Love: Lost and Found
by jakeline
Summary: Jacqueline never told Hamilton her secret. Now they meet again 10 years later. How will Jacqueline tell Hamilton that Jake never really existed and that she was the boy he fell in love with? Chapter 21: Nothing’s Gonna Change My Love For You
1. Bittersweet Memories

**Love; Lost and Found**

A _Young American_- story

By: jakeline

_Summary:__ Jake/Jacqueline never told Hamilton her secret. Now they meet again 10 years later. How will Jacqueline tell Hamilton that Jake never really existed and that she was the boy he fell in love with? _

_Disclaimer:__ I do not own the characters or the plot from 'Young Americans', but this story and the poem are my own. _

**Chapter 1: Bittersweet memories**

A laugh floated over the bar. A laugh that reminded him so much of someone he used to know. Someone he hadn't let himself think about for many years. An image of a boy on a motorcycle flickered before his eyes. Jake. They had been best friends through high school. One night had changed it all. Hamilton shook the memory away. It was too painful.

Hamilton Fleming was in London for a photo shoot. For the past five years he had been traveling the world as a freelance photographer. He knew he was good. All the major magazines were screaming for him, but he was not ready to settle down for just one magazine yet. He was content with the life he led at the moment. It was filled with glamour, charity events, cocktail parties and gorgeous girls. He was in the top ten of America's most wanted bachelors. But Hamilton stayed single. He was still looking for that one. He knew she was out there somewhere.

-xXx-

"Ham?" Hamilton looked up. Scout smiled. "A penny for your thoughts."

Hamilton flashed him his famous crooked smile. "Sorry Scout, ghosts from the past." Scout raised an eyebrow questioningly but said nothing. "It's nothing."

"OK." Scout took another sip of his beer.

The laugh was still in Hamilton's head when he went back to his hotel that night. It couldn't be him. What would Jake be doing in London of all places? Hamilton had not heard from him since that last night at Rawley. The only thing he had left of Jake was the note he had left on his nightstand before he left. The note still puzzled Hamilton. Something was not right.

**.::Flashback::.**

"I think I'm in love with you, Jake," Hamilton whispered as they left the prom. Jake just looked at him with a peculiar face. For some time now Hamilton had felt that there was something Jake kept from him, he just couldn't figure out what it was. Their relationship had been a bit tense for the last few weeks. Hamilton had realized he loved Jake. Against his own will. He was afraid of being gay. He couldn't let Jake know until he was completely sure and now the time had come. He followed Jake to his room that night. As they sat down on Jake's bed Jake turned to him.

"Did you really mean what you said before? That about you loving me?"

"Of course I did," Hamilton answered and leaned closer.

"How can you say that?! I… I'm not gay!" Jake was upset and Hamilton did not understand why.

During their time at Rawley Jake had never had any girls, or boys for that matter. Hamilton had been certain Jake felt the same, but now he wasn't as sure.

"It is not like I planned it!" Hamilton defended himself. "I didn't choose to fall in love with you." He looked at Jake with pleading eyes.

"So you love me against your will?" Jake asked with tears swelling in his beautiful hazel eyes. Hamilton had never seen Jake cry and it broke his heart to see those tears now. He wanted Jake to be happy and to say that he loved him too.

"Yes, you could say that," Hamilton said. He raised a hand in attempt to wipe away a tear that was rolling down Jake's cheek but Jake pushed his hand away.

"I can't do this," Jake said. "There is no way in hell I would want someone to love me against his or hers will. Don't you see?"

"Fine, whatever! I don't care!" Hamilton answered angrily. He was to go from this room with some dignity left. He could not say anything to Jake now without hurting him. Jake's tears were slipping down his cheeks.

"I can't do this, I have to leave," Jake said quietly. "I can't stay here," he continued.

"No, don't, I'm sorry," Hamilton said and put a hand on his arm, he regretted the harsh words. "Stay with me tonight." He did not want the night to end like this. _Just one night…_

"Give me one good reason why I should stay with you. You who love me against your will."

"Just for tonight, then you can leave." Hamilton was not used to beg and now he didn't know why he did it. No, he knew, he did not want to lose Jake.

Jake looked at him intensely with his hazel eyes. It was as if he tried to figure out what Hamilton was thinking. His eyes made Hamilton feel guilty.

"OK," Jake finally said. "But no touching, OK? Just sleeping."

"Fine," Hamilton answered.

They fell asleep next to each other, Hamilton with one arm around Jake. But when he woke up in the morning Jake was gone. All he found was a note with a peculiar poem and it left Hamilton quite puzzled.

_This is goodbye_

_Your wish is granted_

_I'll take my leave_

_Goodbye forever, sweet memories_

_and dreams of what could have been_

_but never will…_

_Mark my word_

_I never said I was a nice person_

_You didn't listen_

_I'm sorry that I let you down_

_I'm sorry I overreacted_

_But that is was I do_

_When I like someone more than what is proper. _

_I hope one day_

_I'll be the center of some boy's universe_

_I bid you, Goodbye. _

**.::End Flashback::.**

Hamilton woke up bathing in sweat. The memory had been so clear, like he had been there once again. He hadn't heard from Jake since. He had often wondered what had happened to him, after a while he stopped and tried to forget him instead. It happened that he sometimes looked at the photos he had taken of Jake. Especially the first one when Jake first arrived at Rawley. He still couldn't figure out what he had done wrong. Hamilton drew a long breath and thought it best not to dwell on the past. I could not have been Jake in the bar. It was impossible. Or was it? He was not sure. He had told Scout he was going to meet him for breakfast. Scout was in London with the law firm he was working with, and Will was going to catch up with them later that week.

Will was now a successful writer. He and Bella had found each other again after high school, but Hamilton suspected Will always had had a crush on her, and she on him. They had always been the best of friends and the step towards loving each other was not big. All their friends were just waiting for them to get married, but still they had not set a date. Bella was running the gas station in New Rawley. Will was coming to London to do some research for his new book

They all tried to find time to meet when they could. The only one missing from the former 'fab five' was Jake. Hamilton had never told the others of what had happened that night, and no one dared to ask.

-xXx-

Jacqueline woke up with a moan. Her head was aching from the night before. The team from her latest model shoot had been out celebrating that it had gone so well. Jacqueline Pratt had paid her way through college by doing some modeling, when she was finished she was one of the top models in America. She was now thinking of staring up her own business in building websites and other computer related things.

She was tired of the life as a model. She had one job left in London and then she would go back to the States to start up her business. She was now 28 and it was time to settle down. Just this one shoot, she reminded herself. The only thing she knew about this shoot was that the photographer was very good and had worked with all the major magazines over the world. The work she had seen had been fabulous and she was looking forward to work with him.

She had been preoccupied since she left Rawley and never thought of it anymore. That last night had hurt her so much. Bella Banks was the only one who had seen through the disguise, and she knew her secret was safe with Bella. Bella was also the only one she kept in contact with. They did not talk about Hamilton at all, though Jacqueline had told her what had happened. She was happy that Will and Bella had finally got it together. She envied them. She had once thought that was going to happen with her and Hamilton, but Jacqueline had never had the courage to tell him her secret.

That last night was engraved in her memory. He had said the words she had been longing to hear, but he had also said that he loved her against his will, against his being. She could not tell him then, not after what he had said. She had left that night and never looked back. No, that was not the whole truth. She had been looking back. She had been dreaming of that night for over a year afterwards. She couldn't understand why she started thinking of him now. His radiant blue eyes flashed before her. She sighed. Just the memory of them made her heart skip a beat.

-xXx-

He came early to the shoot. He wanted to catch a glimpse of the famous Jacqueline before she saw him. Just so that he could start thinking of how he wanted the picture. And there she was. Beautiful creature. During his career as a photographer he had not seen anyone like her. He knew right away how he wanted her. He could see it before him. This was going to be the best shoot ever. The dark curly hair, her slender body, those hazel eyes… Hamilton knew right away that this was the girl he had been waiting for. As she turned fully towards him it was as if someone had stabbed him in the heart. Jake! Hamilton quickly turned away. He did not see that Jacqueline's reaction was quite similar to his own.

-xXx-

_Oh my freaking god! Hamilton is the photographer! God! I hope he doesn't recognize me!_ The thoughts rummaged through Jacqueline's brain. She was shocked to see him there. He looked as gorgeous as ever. Seeing his reaction he must have recognized her or, rather, Jake. But she looked different now. Her hair was all grown out and she wore it all mess up with hairpins that drew the wild curls from her face. There was no way he would see her as Jake. It had been 10 years, she reassured herself. She was Jacqueline, top model. Not the insecure teenager that craved her mother's attention, so eager that she dressed up in boy's clothes. She could face Hamilton. She might even be able to tell him the truth if he mentioned her resemblance to Jake. He still had the same effect on her. She felt drawn to him as a bee to honey.

-TBC-

I actually found the beginning for this in an old notebook of mine. Hope you like it... Reviews are always welcome!


	2. Kiss the Girl

**Love;**** Lost and Found**

A _Young Americans_- story

By: jakeline

_Summary:__ Jake/Jacqueline never told Hamilton her secret. Now they meet again 10 years later. How will Jacqueline tell Hamilton that Jake never really existed and that she was the boy he fell in love with? _

_Disclaimer:__ I do not own the characters or the plot from 'Young Americans', but this story and the poem are my own. _

**Chapter 2: ****Kiss the girl**

**.::Flashback::.**

"Cool bike," a voice said next to her as she stood waiting for crew practice to start. Jake looked up and there he was, Hamilton Fleming, with his piercing eyes that seemed to see straight through her. "Students aren't allowed motorcycles," he continued.

"Well, students aren't allowed a lot of things," she answered. "Hasn't stopped me yet."

"If you continue riding around on that hog, I guarantee you that someone will," he said and continued: "Unless you have an ally, someone with connections high up. Someone who would like to take a ride on that bike sometimes." He smiled a crooked smile. "I'm like a Swiss vault, I can keep a secret." His smile widened and her heart melted, but she played her role.

"Can you?" She looked up at him, but before she had a chance to continue, Finn their teacher came to start practice.

**.::End Flashback::.**

Ah, that summer had been one of her best. Jacqueline sighed. She still remembered how she had sat right in front of him unable to take her eyes away from him. She didn't really have that much of a choice either. He was right there, in all his gorgeousness. Ah, and he was such a sight to be seen. The position as coxswain suited her perfectly. She sighed once more, those were the days. The days of the 'fab five', Jake, Ham, Scout, Bella and Will. They had done everything together. Hamilton had been her closest friend, in spite of her secret. There were so many times she had been close to tell him, but never dared. Oh how she wished she had had the guts. Seeing him now, it was as if nothing had changed. Just his presence made the old feelings swell up. She still loved him like crazy.

-xXx-

Hamilton stood outside the studio and tried to comprehend what he had just seen. Of course it was not Jake, he told himself. It was just that Jacqueline resembled him. Nothing more, no biggie. _Get a grip, man!_ He suddenly remembered the way Jake used to smile, the way he smelled and his hazel eyes. The suppressed feelings bubbled up again. He let out a sigh. He couldn't believe himself. After all these years the thought of Jake still had the same effect on him. Here he was, a successful man who could have almost any girl he wanted, pining after a boy he had not heard from or seen for ten years.

"Hamilton?" He turned around found his assistant there.

"Mmm?"

"We're waiting for you."

"Yeah," Hamilton answered and followed him inside. Everything was set. The models were styled and ready and Jacqueline was stunning. Her dark hair was slicked down on her head; her fringe was parted to one side with one curl slicked down on her forehead. The stylist had let her hair curl up in the curve of her neck. She was wearing a long flashy gown that clung to her curves. The dress was dark ruby red and it fell beautifully from her hips and down her feet and shifted towards blue. He could barely take his eyes off her. Her eyes were shaded with black, her lips glossy and her cheeks slightly red as if blushing. He felt his body responding to the sight of her. He had to look away not to reveal what he felt.

-xXx-

As soon as Hamilton entered the studio again she felt his presence without turning. She could feel his eyes burning her neck. She knew she looked fabulous in the Moulin Rouge-inspired dress. She turned around slowly as if to say something to the stylist. Their eyes locked. He was the one to break the gaze but before he did she saw something in his eyes. Something that made her draw a deep breath and then he turned away. She still couldn't believe that she had never heard of Hamilton being a photographer. She made a mental note to check that out. She had seen his pictures but how could she have missed his name?

"Ok, people, gather around," Hamilton shouted and everyone flocked around him. He told them about how he wanted the models to stand and how the setting and lights should be. Jacqueline could picture it before her. It was going to be brilliant. Hamilton was really good at what he was doing.

The shoot went great. Jacqueline looked and felt gorgeous.

"Great work everybody!" Hamilton said as they were ready to leave. "There is a reservation down in Soho on a Japanese restaurant for those of you that are interested."

Jacqueline didn't know what to do. One side of her told her to get the hell out of there but the other urged her to go to the dinner and try to find time to talk to Hamilton. She longed to get to know him again, to tell him the truth, to hold him... She decided to compromise and make a quick appearance, have a bite to eat and then excuse herself with an early flight to the States the morning after. Which was basically the truth.

-xXx-

"I don't think we've met," a voice said behind her. Jacqueline had been persuaded to follow the gang to a bar for a drink after the dinner. Since she hadn't had the chance to talk to Hamilton yet she was easy to persuade. The hair in her neck curled up by the sound of his voice and she turned around slowly.

"I believe you're right," she said with a small smile.

"Hamilton Fleming." He put out his hand.

"Jacqueline Pra..." she hesitated. "Prescott, Jacqueline Prescott." She took his hand and had a silent conversation with her courage. The feeling of just the formal touch of their handshake made her blood boil and send tingling sensations up her spine. She drew a deep breath and let it out slowly to gain her control again.

"Don't I know you from somewhere?" he said with a silly grin as if hearing how ridiculous the question sounded. She chuckled a little.

"Is that a line you use to pick up girls?" She couldn't help herself.

"Well..." His cheeks turned red.

"It doesn't work you know, at least not on me. Since I've been in basically every magazine around the world." He blushed and Jacqueline nearly let out a moan. _Does he have to be so adorable? _

-xXx-

As soon as he had said the words he bit his tongue. Her half mocking answer made him blush and feel like a school boy again. She was standing in the bar with her Cosmopolitan. After a few drinks he had totally forgotten about her resemblance with Jake.

"True... true," he answered her and laughed a little. She smiled and tossed her fringe out of her eyes.

"Well, we haven't met before as far as I know," she said. "So you can't really know me from somewhere other than my picture." She took a sip of her drink and looked at him from under her fringe. Piercing blue met hazel eyes. Hamilton knew not what to say and that rarely happened. He usually had a good hand with women. They went all putty in his arms, but Jacqueline was something else. She challenged him. He saw that she had finished her drink.

"Can I get you another one?" He motioned towards her empty glass.

"No, actually, I have to be going," she answered.

"Oh…" He tried not to look too disappointed.

"Early flight back to the States." She smiled when she noticed his disappointment. "I have to pack and all that."

"Of course."

"I really enjoyed working with you," she said.

"Dito," he answered with a broad grin. "I hope this is not the last time." Hamilton said a silent prayer for a negative answer.

"I'm afraid it is, this is, was, my last job." _Damn it!_ Hamilton tried to look cool and unbothered by the fact that he was probably not going to see her ever again.

"Oh, that is too bad."

"Mm, I'm starting my own computer business instead." _Computers? Jake was into computers…_ Jake's face flashed before his eyes again. _Leave me alone, Jake… You had your chance!_

"Beautiful and smart?" He raised an eyebrow and flashed her what he thought was his sexiest smile.

"Right…" _Why am I trying all these cheesy lines? Seriously, get a grip, man! She must think you are a moron!_

-xXx-

_He is so hitting on me!_ Jacqueline could do nothing but smile at his attempts to make her fall for his charms. It was hard not to just throw herself into his arms and tell him how much she loved him and who she really was. She toyed with the idea of letting him follow her to her hotel.

"So, where are you staying?" he asked as if reading her thoughts.

"At a small hotel just off Trafalgar Square," she answered. She didn't want to leave him there, but she really needed to go. "I tell you what," she said and reached for a napkin, "here is my email address, why don't you drop me a line sometime?" She scribbled down the address.

"I'll do that," Hamilton said, looking a bit more cheerful.

"Whenever you are in New York," she smiled.

"I might just hold you to that." His smile grew wider. He followed her to the door and was all gentlemanlike and helped her on with her coat.

"I'll see you when I see you," she hesitated, not really wanting to go. Suddenly he was right next to her, his lips on her lips, his body pressed against hers.

-xXx-

He knew he couldn't just let her go so he threw caution to the wind and just kissed her. She kissed him back after just a moment's hesitation. He breathed in her scent, she smelled so good. He felt like he had come home. Then suddenly, Jake's face flashed before his eyes again. She smelled like Jake. Hamilton froze. Jacqueline opened her eyes and she gazed at him in search of some explanation as to why he broke free.

"I'm sorry... it's just... I..." Hamilton stammered backing off. He didn't know what to say. "I have to go," Jacqueline said and backed away towards the door. Pain was written all over her face. Hamilton felt so guilty. He felt as if he betrayed Jake. _But why?!_ He had not heard from him for ten years. He had been with other women since then and that had never been a problem. _Why is Jake haunting me now? After all these years?_

**-TBC-**

**Reviews are always welcome!**


	3. An Invitation

**Love; Lost and Found**

A _Young Americans_- story

By: jakeline

_Summary:__ Jake/Jacqueline never told Hamilton her secret. Now they meet again 10 years later. How will Jacqueline tell Hamilton that Jake never really existed and that she was the boy he fell in love with? _

_Disclaimer:__ I do not own the characters or the plot from 'Young Americans', but this story and the poem are my own. _

**Chapter 3: An Invitation**

_What the hell happened?_ Jacqueline thought as she sat in her cab on her way to the hotel. Hamilton had looked freaked out when he broke off the kiss. Like as if he had seen a ghost. Suddenly she realized, Jake. Of course he must have thought of him. _Oh I have messed him up!_ Tears swelled in her hazel eyes. She could never ever see him again.

-xXx-

Hamilton on his end cursed himself for letting her go. But the memories of Jake had been too much to bear. He remembered another kiss, 13 years ago on a rooftop.

**.:Flashback:.**

They were on the roof messing with the satellite feed, discussing the miscommunication between girls and boys.

"When a girl says 'I really, really like you', what she means is 'I'm ready for commitment, are you?' But when a guy says 'I really, really like you', all he means is 'I wanna have sex with you'." Hamilton explained.

"Well, it sounds like you have a lot of experience in this area," Jake answered.

"Hacking into this satellite feed is gonna be great. I mean it'll be like twenty times faster than 56K." Hamilton said as he unbuttoned his pants for a pee. Jake put the adapter on the feed and darted up as he heard what he was doing.

"What are you doing?" he gasped.

"I got to pee," he answered. "See, when a girl says, 'What are you doing this weekend?' what she means is, 'I want you to hang out with me instead of your friends,' but when a guy says, 'What are you doing this weekend?' what he means is, 'I wanna have sex with you.'" Hamilton didn't notice Jake's glance downwards before he buttoned his pants again. "You know when a girl says 'I wanna know where this relationship is going', what she means is: 'I'm hopelessly in love and pray that you are too.' But when a guy says 'I wanna know where this relationship is going' what he means is: 'I wanna have sex with you'," Jake said the last 'I wanna have sex with you' at the same time as Hamilton and looked straight into his eyes.

"Right," Hamilton said.

"Yeah, right." Suddenly Jake's face drew nearer and he kissed him. Hamilton flew up looking at Jake, this boy, in utter astonishment. "Oh, God I'm sorry, I'm so sorry…" Jake said, backing away from Hamilton who was now moving in, angry and confused. Hamilton wiped his mouth. Looking at Jake bewilderedly. "Oh God, I'm sorry!" Jake exclaimed as he fled, leaving Hamilton behind.

**.:End Flashback:.**

That had been when Hamilton started to fall in love with Jake. Jake had said he had had a sketchy moment and they had left it as that. They had become best friends after that. Rumors about them being gay had flourished but nothing else had happened until prom night and Jake left. He wondered why he had never heard anything about or from Jake. Nobody had as far as he knew.

-xXx-

"Bella!" Jacqueline shouted as she came out in the arriving hall at JFK. Bella had taken a week off to stay with her in New York. Will had gone off on one of his research trips. "Bella, the weirdest thing happened in London!" She hugged Bella tightly. "Oh, I've missed you!" she continued her rambling about her shoot in London and Bella could not make out half of what she was saying.

"OK, slow down, Jackie," Bella laughed and grabbed her hands. "Breathe!"

"I'm seriously freaked out!"

"I can see that, but tell me in the cab!"

"You'll never guess who I met in London," Jacqueline said as they sat down in the cab. "Hamilton," Bella answered.

Jacqueline's eyes widened. "You knew?"

"Well, yes I put one and one together. Will told me he was meeting up with Ham and Scout in London."

"You must tell me these things!" Jacqueline said and glared at her.

"Well, what are the odds of you meeting him in London of all places?"

"But he is a photographer and I am a model, seriously, the odds are not that high. I didn't even know he was in the business!"

"If I had known, I would have told you. But he has worked everywhere but in the States the last years and so, well. It was not likely that you were going to work with him."

"I didn't even know he was a photographer. I have seen the pictures and all, but never his name."

"But you knew he took a lot of pictures at Rawley?"

"Yes, but still, I didn't know he would become a renowned photographer," Jacqueline said. "But then again, I had not planned to become a model either at that time. I was just a messed up teenager looking for some attention."

"And yet you turned out so great," smiled Bella.

Jacqueline laughed. "I guess I did."

-xXx-

All Hamilton could think of was her lips against his. Why did Jake have to ruin everything? He had had girls before and had never thought of Jake. There was something he had forgotten, something that had triggered the memories again. His mother had said something when he last spoke to her. It was not until he arrived at his flat when here realized what it was. An invitation to the Rawley Academy's reunion. His mother had mentioned that invitations had been sent out. He wondered if Jake would be there, if he had even gotten an invitation. But he had left before graduation? He made a mental note of asking his mother the next time he spoke to her. He was sure Jake would have gotten his diploma if he had stayed. All the finals were finished by the time of the prom.

-xXx-

Jacqueline looked horrified when eyeing through the pile of post. She gasped for air.

"What is it?" Bella asked. Jacqueline had a letter in her hand and looked bewildered. She opened her mouth but no words came out. "Jackie?" Jacqueline handed her the letter. "'Jake Pratt, you are hereby invited to Rawley Academy's 10 year high school reunion class of 2000'," Bella read. "Yeah, so?"

"JAKE, Bella, not Jacqueline. I never told them either. Nobody knows besides you and my mum."

"Ok, so you're just gonna skip it?" Bella looked at her.

"Well, what else can I do? I cannot go there as Jake, that is not an option. I can't do that again. Poor Hamilton. I have messed him up pretty good. People are gonna ask questions, Bella."

"Then you have to explain. Call Mrs. Fleming or something. I'm sure she'll understand."

"Actually, she knows. I had to tell her to get my diploma afterwards. She gave my word not to tell anyone else."

"Why did you go to Hamilton's mother instead of him?" Bella looked confused.

"Well, actually she kind of found me out." Jacqueline told her about how Mrs. Fleming had come searching for her to confront her about her little scheme.

"And she did not tell her husband, the dean?" Bella could not believe what she was hearing.

"It was just before the prom and, well, school was kind of over anyways. It says 'Jacqueline Pratt' on my diploma and that was all I wanted."

"I can't believe she did that for you."

"No, neither can I, when I think about it."

"Maybe she can help you now?"

"But how will that look? After ten years of silence. Tada! Hey look guys Jake is a girl. I never told you because... yeah, why didn't I tell them?" Jacqueline sighed disheartened. "No, I'm just gonna skip it. What do you think Will would say? Seriously Bella?"

"I don't know actually. But I'm sure he would understand."

"And Hamilton? He will freak out and never speak to me again. Ever. He won't forgive me. Not if he finds out like that. I have to meet him on my own, and try to explain."

"I think you owe him that no matter what. But how?"

"Well, he has my email address. Let's hope he is going to New York soon."

"You still love him," Bella said with a broad grin.

"Like mad," answered Jacqueline and blushed.

-xXx-

"Mom?" Hamilton said as his mother answered the phone.

"Oh hi, Munchie," she replied.

"How many times must I tell you not to call me Munchie?"

"A few more times, darling," she answered with a giggle.

"I'm 28!"

"I know that, dear, but you are still my little Munchie." He could hear his mom chuckle on the other side of the line.

"Mom!" groaned Hamilton.

"Well, what is on your mind then?"

"I have to ask you about one of my old classmates."

"Ok, but shouldn't you talk to your father?"

"You always know the more social stuff."

"True."

"Do you know what happened to Jake?" He heard his mother draw a quick breath on the other side of the line. "Mom?"

"Jake?" She sounded as if she didn't remember the name.

"Jake Pratt," Hamilton said.

"Hmm, Jake Pratt..." she hesitated. "No I don't know. I cannot recall him at the moment. I have to check the records, dear." Hamilton could hear on her voice that there was something she was not telling him, but he let it slide for now. She must have her reasons.

"Ok, please do that. And check if he is coming to the reunion."

"Ok, I will do my best. Take care, Munchie." She hung up before Hamilton could say another word.

-xXx-

On the other side of the line sat Kate Fleming with a confused look on her face. She was unsure what to do now. She remembered the day when she had searched Jake Pratt out to confront her. And Jake had told her everything, about her mother, about switching schools and this ploy to get her mother's attention. Kate had sworn not to tell anyone, especially not Hamilton. Not to tell him that the boy he was in love with was actually a girl, desperate for her mother's attention, but also a girl very much in love with him. But terrified of letting people in on her secret because of what the reaction might be after years of posing as a boy.

How she managed to fool them for all those years was still beyond Kate's imagination. She couldn't understand how Jake, no Jacqueline, had been able to keep it up. Or why for that matter? Why not just leave after summer session, or at least tell everyone and then transfer to Rawley Girls? It was for Hamilton, Jacqueline had said. She was not sure on how he would react if she told him. And then, well, the right moment had never come. Until the night of the prom. Kate had contacted Jacqueline earlier that day because she had finally seen through her disguise. Jacqueline's plan then had been to tell Hamilton that night, but for some reason it hadn't gone as planned and Jacqueline left, leaving Hamilton still clueless about who she really was.

Now her son asked questions about the boy he once loved. She knew Jacqueline had gotten an invitation but she was not sure if she would come. On the contrary she was rather sure she was not going to show up. Kate Fleming was not sure if she wanted Jacqueline back in her son's life. Even if she came clean about her little charade in high school. Kate had followed her career as a model and she feared the day when Hamilton and she would meet during a job.

-TBC-

**Reviews are always welcome!**

I am psyched to see there are still some YA-fans out there! Thanks for the nice reviews!


	4. To Mail or Not to Mail

**Love; Lost and Found**

A _Young Americans_- story

By: jakeline

_Summary:__ Jake/Jacqueline never told Hamilton her secret. Now they meet again 10 years later. How will Jacqueline tell Hamilton that Jake never really existed and that she was the boy he fell in love with? _

_Disclaimer:__ I do not own the characters or the plot from 'Young Americans', but this story and the poem are my own. _

**Chapter 4: ****To Mail or Not to Mail**

"You could talk to Mrs. Fleming again, Jackie," Bella said.

"Seriously, Bella, I'm not sure I want to mess everything up again." Jacqueline was not sure whether Mrs. Fleming would help her again. She had been rather unwilling back then; she had only helped her because she saw how desperate she was. Jacqueline had poured her heart out and told her everything.

"Jackie, you have to do something anyways. This is a second chance. Everybody deserves to know."

"I know Bella, I know." Jacqueline sighed heavily. "But I don't think Mrs. Fleming is the way to go." She hoped that Hamilton would be in town soon so that she could talk to him then, before the reunion.

"Actually, I think you will get a chance to meet Ham sooner than you think," Bella suddenly said as if reading Jacqueline's thoughts.

"Yeah?" Jacqueline looked puzzled.

"Yeah, Will is coming here in a few days and then we make the trip back to New Rawley together. He said something about meeting Ham here too."

"Interesting," Jacqueline said and grinned.

-xXx-

Hamilton found himself being on his way to New York just a week after getting home. He had not yet heard back from his mother regarding Jake and tried to get him out of his head. The napkin with Jacqueline's email address was safely tucked away in his wallet. He was still unsure whether he should drop her a line or not. He didn't want to come off to strong. She was not the only woman in his life. And thinking of how things had ended at their last encounter, he was a bit hesitant as to how she would react to an email from him.

He was meeting Will later that day. Will was in New York to meet Bella who had been visiting a friend there.

"So, what do you think? Should I send her an email?" Hamilton asked when he and Will had just gotten beers at the hotel bar.

"Seriously, Ham. It's THE Jacqueline we're talking about." Will wriggled his eyebrows."I know," answered Hamilton nodding his head.

"Dude, she's seriously hot. You have to take this chance. If not for you, then for every breathing man out there!"

"I have to, haven't I?" Hamilton smiled. "So, who is this mystery girl Bella has been visiting?"

"An old friend. They get together a few times each year," Will answered.

"But you have never met her?" Hamilton looked curious.

"No, I know it sounds weird, but Bella always travels to meet her at different locations. I don't know why." Will took a sip of his beer and thought of it. "I guess Bella needs to travel too."

"But still… you have never met this girl? I can't believe it." Hamilton laughed. "I wonder why."

Will hit him on the arm. "Stop it Hamilton. I am sure there's nothing wrong with Jackie."

"Oh, so she has a name has she?" Hamilton laughed even harder. _Wait, Jackie? Why does every girl I meet or hear about have names that resembles Jake? _Hamilton went quiet.

"So," Will said, changing the subject, "High school reunion, huh?"

"Yeah. To think it's been ten years." Hamilton smiled.

"Ah, those were the days, my friend," Will said with a goofy smile. "What ever happened to Jake?" Will suddenly asked innocently. Hamilton froze. _What's with all this Jake-crap?_

"I dunno," he answered unwillingly. He did not wish to talk about Jake now.

"Seriously?" Will looked surprised. "I thought you guys were close."

"Well, I guess we weren't as close as everyone thought!" Hamilton said sharply trying to make Will understand that he did not wish to continue on the subject. He shook his head and glared at Will.

"Sorry! Jeez." Will threw his hands up in an I-surrender-kind-of-way. "A bit touchy are we?"

"I'm sorry, Will. I have just been so stressed lately." Hamilton regretted his outburst and smiled apologetically.

"Don't worry, man." Hamilton let out a sigh of relief. "Really it's ok. But you must wonder. I mean I wonder too. Just take off like that and then not a word?" Hamilton shrugged. There was the poem, but he did not feel like telling Will that just now. He didn't know how he would take the whole Ham-loved-Jake-thing.

"Yeah, not a single word in ten years." Hamilton sank in thoughtful silence. He didn't notice that Will studied him intensely with a puzzled face.

-xXx-

Jacqueline frowned when checking her emails. Nothing from Hamilton yet. As far as she and Bella knew he had been in town for at least two days according to Will's report. Jacqueline even checked the spam folder, but nothing. She sighed disappointedly.

"Nothing?" asked Bella and sat down next to her.

"Nope. You'd think a guy would jump to the opportunity of a date with a famous model. But yet again I am wrong."

"Oh, Jackie, you are so love sick, aren't you?" Bella giggled. Jacqueline just glared at her.

"Be quite you! You should talk! Miss 'I have the hugest crush on this guy since like forever but I don't tell him until it's nearly too late'." Jacqueline tossed a pen at Bella, who ducked and laughed.

"I know, Jackie. But I only want what's best for you. And you know Ham is what you want."

Jacqueline sighed. She knew Bella was right.

"Oh, why didn't I just give him my number or at least ask for his?" Jacqueline cursed herself. Oh no she had to be the mysterious girl who only hands out her email address.

"Yes, why didn't you?" Bella asked.

"He didn't offer and well, frankly I thought as I wrote down my address he would give me his. Again, I am sadly mistaken on thinking I have a clue as to how men work." Jacqueline hit herself on the head; feeling frustrated and started tugging at her hair.

"Jackie, seriously. How hard can it be to get hold of his email address? You're the computer ace. He must have a website, right?" Jacqueline just stared at Bella with her mouth half open her hands entangled in her hair. _Why didn't I think of that? _

"Bella!" she shrieked taking Bella's face in her hands. "You're a genius!" She quickly typed in the address for one of the search engines on the net. 'Hamilton Fleming+photographer' she wrote and hit search. Before long she found what she was looking for. She let out and triumphant "Bingo!" But as she opened a new email window she hesitated. "But wouldn't it be too forward?" She looked at Bella as if she wanted her to tell her that it was.

"Of course not!" Bella assured her. Jacqueline started typing.

_To:__ Hamilton Fleming_

_From:__ Jacqueline_

_Subject:__ I found you!_

_Hi, Jacqueline here. I found you_

She hesitated, and then deleted it.

"I don't know what to say."

"How about making it work related?" Bella suggested.

"That is an idea." Jacqueline thought for a moment then started typing again.

_To:__ Hamilton Fleming_

_From:__ Jacqueline_

_Subject:__ Re: The photo shoot_

_Hi Hamilton,_

_I was just wondering how the pics turned out. I forgot to check them before we left for Soho the other week. Since I haven't heard from my agent I grew impatient and hunted you down on the net. ;) I hope you don't think that was too bold of me. I guess you're not coming to NY since I haven't heard from you. _

She stopped writing. Bella was hanging over her shoulder.

"And?" Bella urged her to keep going.

"And…? Should I leave him my number?"

Bella thought about it for a moment. "No, just sign it with Jackie."

"Do you reckon it's enough? Shouldn't I tell him to forward some of the shots to my email? I am asking about the pics aren't I?"

"Yeah, that's true. Ok write that and then end it with, 'I guess you're not coming to NY' and then sign with Jackie." Jacqueline started typing again.

"Just Jackie? No hugs and kisses?" Jacqueline said almost seriously but Bella wrinkled her nose.

"What are you? Fifteen?"

Jacqueline giggled. "I sure feel like it… " She continued writing. "So how about this?" She moved aside to let Bella read.

_To:__ Hamilton Fleming_

_From:__ Jacqueline_

_Subject:__ Re: The photo shoot_

_Hi Hamilton,_

_I was just wondering how the pics turned out. I forgot to check them before we left for Soho the other week. Since I haven't heard from my agent I grew impatient and hunted you down on the net. ;) I hope you don't think that was too bold of me. If you could forward some of the pics to my email account I would be forever grateful! _

_I guess you're not coming to NY since I haven't heard from you. Bummer… _

_Take care __– Jackie_

"Brilliant!" Bella exclaimed, clapping her hands with delight. "I especially enjoyed the 'bummer'. Poor Ham, he's so utterly clueless."

-xXx-

As Hamilton finally sat down to write the email to Jacqueline he saw that the email icon was blinking indicating an unread message. He curiously clicked it and was surprised to see a mail with Jacqueline as the sender. Eagerly he opened not sure what to expect. The last line made him frown a bit and regret that he had not emailed her before he left for New York. He had a semi-good excuse in the fact that the New York trip had come as a happy surprise a day before he was needed on the location. The other intent was disappointedly enough just work related. She inquired after pictures from the London shoot. Wait… _Jackie?_ She had signed the letter with Jackie. Hamilton was totally confused. Bella's friend was also a Jackie. Jackie was of course short for Jacqueline. _Oh, stop it man. You are so over thinking things!_ _You see ghosts everywhere… _Bella was not friends with the famous Jacqueline. She would have told Will if she was. _Right?_

He had not had the time to make copies during his short stay at home, but he still had them in digital format on his laptop. _The wonders of the digital age._ Now the only thing left was to figure out a good reply. In the meantime he looked through the pictures to see which ones he wanted to send her. She looked gorgeous on each an every one of them. He studied them closely. She really could be Jake's sister. Jake had never mentioned any siblings. Hamilton was sure he had been an only child. But she had introduced herself as Jacqueline Prescott, although she had hesitated. He pondered on that pause she had made. Hadn't she started with 'Pra…' and then changed her mind? What could it mean? Was she Jake's sister and actually knew who he was and didn't want him to know? He took out his wallet and searched through it until he found an old battered picture of a smiling young boy. He held it up next to Jacqueline's face. It couldn't be, could it? _What the hell?!_ He shook his head and looked again. The same smile, the same nose, even the same eyes. Hamilton rose slowly, not wanting to see what he was seeing. _No it can't be…_

-TBC-

**Reviews are always welcome!**

I am psyched to see there are still some YA-fans out there! Thanks for the kind reviews!


	5. Ignorance is Bliss

**Love; Lost and Found**

A _Young Americans_- story

By: jakeline

_Summary:__ Jake/Jacqueline never told Hamilton her secret. Now they meet again 10 years later. How will Jacqueline tell Hamilton that Jake never really existed and that she was the boy he fell in love with? _

_Disclaimer:__ I do not own the characters or the plot from 'Young Americans', but this story and the poem are my own. _

**Chapter 5: ****Ignorance is Bliss**

"Still nothing?" Bella asked the next day.

"Nope," Jacqueline answered sulkily. "What's his problem?"

"I don't know. I don't get it." Bella looked compassionately at her.

"Man! How I hate to feel this insecure," Jacqueline exclaimed. "It has never happened before!"

"I'll call Will and ask if Ham has said anything," Bella offered.

"One could think we're back in high school letting my friends run my errands," snorted Jacqueline.

"Didn't we establish that you were mentally fifteen yesterday?" Bella replied mockingly. Jacqueline grunted something about 'not liking people who remembers every single word she happened to say.' Bella giggled: "Oh you are so cute when you are pining and whining do you know that?"

"Shut up!" Jacqueline muttered sourly under her breath. Bella jumped up to fetch her cell. "Don't you dare." Jacqueline glared at her warningly.

"Jackie, you will feel so much better if you know that Ham has told Will all about you. Your gorgeousness and what not." Bella tossed her long blonde hair from one shoulder to the other and dialed Will's number. "Hi honey. It's me," she said and went silent. "What?! Uh huh? Really?" Her face turned white then red and she started pacing the room nervously. Jacqueline stood up mouthing 'What?!' "I see… " Bella said hesitatingly into the phone and held up a hand towards Jacqueline to stop her frantic waving of arms. Jacqueline became still but started chewing her lip instead. "You're sure? I mean, Ham is sure?" Bella looked like she did not know whether to laugh or cry. "A picture? No… Uh huh… I gotta go babe, take care. Yeah, I love you too." She hung up her cell and turned slowly towards an expectant Jacqueline. "We may have a slight problem."

-xXx-

"Are you sure?" Will looked at the franticly pacing Hamilton unbelievingly.

"Yes, of course I'm sure. God, Will! Do you think I would tell you this if I wasn't sure?" Hamilton blurted out the words. He still couldn't believe it. His Jake and Jacqueline was the same person. "Look for yourself!" Hamilton held up the old picture of Jake beside the laptop screen with Jacqueline's face on it.

"Why do you have an old picture of Jake, anyways?" Will looked from one picture to the other, frowning.

"I don't know. I guess it's always been there." Hamilton shrugged his shoulders uncomfortably. Will looked at him suspiciously, and then back at the pictures.

"Yeah, I see the resemblance." Will couldn't deny it any longer.

"I told you!"

"But how? Why?" Will was lost for words.

"I don't know! All I know is that there is no Jake Pratt listed anywhere in the US, nor a Jacqueline Prescott. There is, however, a Jacqueline Pratt. She is born on the same day as Jake. Everything is totally messed up!" Hamilton yelled.

"So what? They could be twins?"

"No, Will, I am sorry, but they must be the same person. There is no other way," Hamilton stated the painfully obvious. "There is no Jake."

"He must have had a really good surgeon," Will said after a while, with a small smile on his lips.

"It's not funny, Will. Ah, that is way low, even for you."

"You must admit that he makes one hot chick." Hamilton just shook his head. He was not so sure that Jake had gone through a sex change. The more he thought of it the more certain he got. He didn't remember one single time when seeing Jake even in shorts let alone in a just t-shirt or trunks. He had always had long sleeves and jeans or sweats, even when it was in the middle of summer. He had been small, almost fragile. No, Jake had never been a boy. Jake had fooled them all. He began to understand why Jake had behaved as he had that last night, the poem, everything. _Why didn't you tell me? Didn't you trust me enough? _Hamilton felt betrayed. Jake had fooled him for 13 years. If he had only known.

-xXx-

"Bella?" Jacqueline wondered what Will could have said that had upset her so. What was the slight problem she had mentioned?

"Ok Jackie. You will be glad to hear that Ham has spoken about you. Oh yeah. He thought you hot and all that. Then your mail came with your inquiry of the photos."

"Go on," Jacqueline urged Bella. She had no idea what was coming. Had she been that wrong in sending him the letter? What?! Jacqueline felt the panic strike and she started fidgeting with her hair.

"Yeah, well, Ham of course looked through the pics to see which ones to send, right." Bella paused.

"And? Spill it girl!" Jacqueline squealed.

"It seems he took a real close look at your beautiful face, and for some reason he had to compare it with an old photo of Jake."

"He has an old photo of Jake?!" Jacqueline looked utterly surprised, then a bit worried again. "Oh, ok, so we look alike, no big deal." She tried to stay positive.

"On the contrary, milady. So you know you look the same, basically. Hamilton searched the net to see if you were siblings but found no listing for a Jake Pratt or a Jacqueline Prescott. But as you know, there is a Jacqueline Pratt. You. And well, he kinda figured the whole thing out. Yeah, so the secret is kinda out." Bella finished her speech a bit out of breath.

"He is crafty, one must give him that. But why does he have a picture of Jake after all this time? Isn't that kinda, I dunno, weird?" Jacqueline tried to smile, but it looked more like a frown.

"Apparently he had an old one stashed away somewhere. Does it matter? On the good side, Will thinks you have gone through a sex change." Bella tried to cheer her friend up.

Jacqueline just sighed. "That's just wrong."

"Beats being the one that cross dressed the whole time, doesn't it?"

"Eh? No, not really, it is basically the same thing but just the other way around and then actually going through tons of surgeries and stuff. God, Bella!" Jacqueline looked like she was going to be sick. "This is so bad. Isn't it? Hamilton must be totally freaked out at the thought of him declaring his love to a freak like me. Oh Bella, he is so gonna need some heavy therapy. Well, that does it though. No reunion for me. End of discussion. I cannot meet anyone from that time."

"You know what you need?" Bella decided to leave the subject completely.

"No," sneered Jacqueline. "Well, ok, yes, as a matter of fact I do come to think about it. I need a good shrink and then a bottle of tequila."

"The shrink I cannot give you, but I can set you up a date with José Cuervo. Let's hit the town, girlfriend."

-xXx-

"Ok, so that was Bella," Will said. "She sounded as shocked about this as we." Hamilton looked miserable. He just wanted to crawl into bed and wake up and find that this was just a very bizarre dream

"Yeah, whatever. I do not want to talk about it. It is just too freaky right now."

"I did not see this coming."

"No and I am feeling so pissed off at the whole thing right now."

"Why? What Jake did after high school is really none of our business. If he felt stuck in the wrong body…"

"Oh stop being so understanding Will! Seriously. Doesn't it bother you?!" Hamilton was annoyed with his friend's compassion for everyone in this world.

"Of course it feels a bit strange when thinking back at all the times one spent half naked in his company, but hey… Hamilton, it was like ten years ago, you have to let it go."

"Yeah, right. Now that I think have found THE one, guess what! She's my best friend from high school. Only then she was a he." Hamilton's face was turning red with frustration.

"Ham, were you two…" Will didn't know how to put it. "Were you ever…?"

"Oh, come on Will! NO, we were not together. I am not gay, and neither was he… or at least he said he wasn't." Hamilton glared at Will. "I mean she… "

"So you discussed it…" Will wouldn't let it go.

"Shut up Will! I am not ready…" Hamilton looked at Will with a painful face. He guessed he had to tell him eventually. "Some other time ok? I'll tell you everything, just not right now. Ok?"

"Ok, Ham." Will looked as if he at least tried to understand.

"All I can say now is that I am pretty sure there are no surgeries involved. Ok?"

"Ok, if you say so." Will gave up.

"I need a drink," Hamilton said and rose to fetch his jacket.

"Yeah, me too." Will followed him out.

-xXx-

"Oh, Bella, what am I to do?" Jacqueline looked at her friend with sadness in her eyes. Before the phone call to Will everything had been great. She had almost had a plan for telling Hamilton the truth. She had even been almost certain that he would have understood why she had done what she had. They might even become a couple again. But now everything felt lost. He would never speak to her again.

"I don't know, Jackie." Bella had no clue as to how to go on from this.

"The ball is really in his court now."

"Is it?" Bella glanced over at her friend.

"Isn't it?" Jacqueline gulped down another shot of tequila. Four empty shot glasses stood in front of her on the bar. Bella stuck to beer.

"I'm not sure. What would you do if you found out that the guy you thought of as your best friend turned out to be a girl?"

"Oh, tell me what to do! You're my friend, right?"

"Yes, of course."

"Was I so wrong in not telling him, then and there?"

"Do you want me to be honest?" Bella asked.

"Yeah, no… ah I don't know." Jacqueline let out long sigh. "I don't know anything anymore." She motioned to the bartender for another shot of tequila. "I am so glad I have José here to help me out." She giggled a little.

"Jackie, haven't you had enough to drink?" Bella was worried for her friend. Jacqueline didn't usually drink too much.

"Nope," Jacqueline said and finished the other shot. "A beer, Mr. Bartender-man," she held up a hand and waved towards the bartender who shortly handed her a bottle. "I wanna get pissed and do something like totally crazy!" She glanced around the bar in search of a good victim. "I need to get laid."

"No, you don't, Jackie," Bella tried to stop her friend for getting off the bar stool. She failed and had to watch her friend strut her stuff over to the dance floor with the bottle in one hand and the other hand over her head.

"Oh, Bella I love this song!" Jacqueline shouted as Macy Gray's 'I try' came on. "Oh the memories… " Jacqueline started swaying her body to the music, lost in memories. Bella sighed. This was going to be one battle for the books.

**.::Flashback::.**

They were having lit. class out on the lawn. Hamilton was reading a poem out loud. Scout and Paige seem to have some more interest in each other than on class.

"'With their fires and their glories and the rest, Love is best.' The end," Hamilton finished reading.

"What does this poem mean to any one of you? Scout!" Finn interrupted Paige and Scouts discussion.

"Yes?" Scout moved his attention towards the class again.

"So you like these coed classes."

"Uh huh," Scout murmured and Jacqueline started laughing.

"Jake!" Finn turned towards her instead. "Had a crush lately?" Jacqueline cursed herself for not being able to shut up.

"Ah, maybe," she finally said. Glancing over at Hamilton who was lying in front of her, his face turned sour. Just a few days before they had argued over this Cali-girl named Lena. Jacqueline was still sure Hamilton was into Lena and Hamilton of course thought she was into Lena and that Lena of course was into Jake. The whole thing was getting out of hand.

"Ok, well, what poem, no what song, makes you feel?" Finn asked.

Without thinking she answered: "I try, Macy Gray." She bit her tongue,_Good one Jackie… Like a guy would choose a song like that?! _

"Let's hear it. You don't have to sing it, just recite it."

"Ok. 'I keep my cool, but I'm fiendin. I try to say goodbye and I choke. Try to walk away and I stumble.'" She looked straight at Hamilton. _Oh, Ham, if you only knew…_ "'Though I try to hide it it's clear…'"

Lena suddenly cut in: "'My world crumbles when you are not here.'" Everyone looked at her. "What?! It's a good song." Jacqueline chuckled. _It's near, not here_. But she remained quiet. No use in putting herself out there more than she already had.

"These words comfort us because we personalize them," Finn said. "Now, let's personalize Browning." He turned to Will, as always when it came to those things. "Mr. Krudski."

"Maybe what Browning is saying is even the strongest armies and empires can be wiped out. No one can stop people from falling in love."_He's such a dork…_

"Spoken like a hopeless romantic," smiled Finn.

**.::End flashback::.**

"Ok, that's it, dancing queen, I'm taking you home," Bella grabbed Jacqueline's arm and dragged her off the dance floor.

"No, just one more dance," Jacqueline begged. "Or another tequila." Jacqueline thought the last idea was splendid and tried to make her way back to the bar, but Bella steered her towards the exit.

"I think you've had enough for one night."

"No," Jacqueline whined. She just wanted forget everything that had happened the last day or two. "Hamilton must hate my guts."

"I'm sure he doesn't," Bella reassured her when finally getting Jacqueline into a cab. "But you will probably hate yourself when you wake up in the morning with a nasty headache."

Bella had to make up her mind, to tell Will or not. Jacqueline would probably hate her for it, but she was sure Jackie and Ham belonged together. Bella needed Will's help in order to fix this.

-TBC-

**Reviews are always welcome!**


	6. The Truth is Out There

**Love; Lost and Found**

A _Young Americans_- story

By: jakeline

_Summary:__ Jake/Jacqueline never told Hamilton her secret. Now they meet again 10 years later. How will Jacqueline tell Hamilton that Jake never really existed and that she was the boy he fell in love with? _

_Disclaimer:__ I do not own the characters or the plot from 'Young Americans', but this story is my own. _

**Chapter 6****: The Truth is Out There**

Will was forced to watch his friend gulp down drink after drink, wallowing in his self pity. Hamilton was totally and utterly miserable. He couldn't stop thinking of all the times Jake could have told him her secret. He still couldn't believe why she didn't trust him. They were close as friends ever could be. Jake had told him everything else, about his acting mother who didn't really know he existed, the scams he had done to make her notice him. He corrected himself, _she, her!__God, that feels way wrong. _

"But, Ham, has it ever occur to you that this might actually be a good thing?" Will had to ask.

"Why, Will? Why is it a good thing?" Hamilton stared at him.

"Well, Jake's a girl" Will said as a matter-of-factly.

"Your point being?" Hamilton didn't understand what Will was getting at.

"There must have been something between you guys, back then I mean."

"Will, I said I don't want to talk about it. Just leave it!" Hamilton finished his drink and quickly ordered another one. Rum was his beverage for the day.

"But now you can be together. And she's hot."

"You are weird, you are. How can you look at the world with such a wide open mind? It's like nothing ever surprises you." Hamilton eyed his friend unbelievingly.

"I dunno, I guess it's a work thing. Just give it some time." Will took a sip of his beer. He was out of Hamilton's league tonight. And he had no interest in getting shit-faced either. Hamilton did such a great job on his own.

"Yeah, I need like a million years. It's too disturbing." Hamilton began having trouble with slurring.

"What happened? Why did Jake leave before graduation?"

"I told him I loved him." Hamilton looked into Will's eyes with sorrowful blue eyes that had lost their spark. "Yeah, now I see why he left. I mean she."

"And?" Will asked.

"Yeah, well I did not really have a way with words back then. I'm not you, you know. And some things came out wrong and Jake got hurt." Hamilton was remorseful; he had regretted the words as soon as he had uttered them ten years ago. He had never had the chance to say sorry.

"How?"

"What part of I don't want to talk about it don't you understand?!" Hamilton blurted out. He didn't feel like pouring out his heart right now. Not when feeling so betrayed and confused and drunk on top of that. He ordered a whisky straight up and drank it as soon as the bartender had poured it. Will looked a bit hurt. "I promise I will tell you eventually."

"Fine."

"Ok. Time to go home I think," Hamilton said and rose on not entirely steady feet.

"Yup, no point in emptying the whole bar, there might be someone else who fancy a drink," Will said with a chuckle.

-xXx-

"Babe, I need your help," Bella said when calling Will the next day. "Can we meet, you know secretly? I have to tell you something." Bella tried to whisper so that she didn't wake Jacqueline from her slumber. "Great, meet you in 15, ok?" She searched for a piece of paper to write a message to Jacqueline on. "Yeah, love you to, babe." She hung up and scribbled down a few lines for Jacqueline.

-xXx-

Hamilton groaned as he woke up the next day. It hadn't been a bad dream. Just to make things better his head felt like an elephant had sat on it and his mouth felt like sandpaper.

"Morning, sunshine," Will said as he saw him stirring. "How is the bottle of rum from last night?" Will chuckled at Hamilton's glare. "I took the liberty of ordering some strong black coffee for you." The thought of something slightly resembling food made Hamilton's stomach turn.

"Bugger off, Will. Leave me to my misery."

"Yep, I will. I'm off to have some breakfast. Catch ya later!" Will left him to his self pity.

Hamilton groaned and threw the covers over his head. "I hate my life."

-xXx-

Jacqueline could not move without the world spinning around her. She sank down in her bed again. Bella had left a big glass of water and a note by her bed. She read it with some difficult, she had some problems with focusing her eyes.

_Morning, sleepy__head. I've gone to get me some breakfast and did not want to wake you. Hope your head is not killing you…_

_Bella._

Jacqueline remembered the vast amount of tequila she had gulped down and felt even worse.

"Somebody kill me please," she grunted into the pillow. She soon fell into a dreamless slumber again, oblivious to the schemes her best friend was planning.

-xXx-

"Hey, babe," Bella said as she met Will at the Starbucks a few blocks from Jacqueline's apartment.

"Hey, honey. I've missed you!" Will scooped her in for a big hug. "So what's the big secret?"

"Well, ok, you have to promise not to be angry with me." Bella was just slightly worried that Will would not like the idea.

"Just tell me. You know I can't stay mad at you for long." Will smiled lovingly at her.

"Ok, let's get something to eat first." Bella ordered a large black coffee and a bagel and seated herself by a window table. Will soon followed.

"So, how's Jackie?" Will asked.

"Well, that's who I need to talk to you about. How's Ham, by the way? Is he ok?" Bella was a bit worried.

"Well, right now he's regretting the bottle of rum he had last night." Will smirked. "He has himself to blame. And Jake of course."

"Yeah, I hear you. Jackie played with tequila…" Bella looked up at Will. "Will, there is no Jake, there never was."

"What are you saying Bella?" Will looked utterly clueless.

"Yeah, that's what I wanted to talk to you about. Jackie, my friend you know, Jacqueline, also known as Jake, he's a girl. Always has been."

"So you're saying… THE Jacqueline is our Jake?!"

"Yes, that's what I am saying."

"How long have you known?"

"Since I dunno, forever?" Bella looked nervously at him. "I saw through the disguise after the cotillion during your first summer session at Rawley."

"Seriously?! How come we never did?" Will gaped open-mouthed with surprise.

"Eh, because you're boys? You don't see things the way we do."

"Poor Hamilton. He's still hung up on Jake. You should have seen him when he found out yesterday."

"Poor Jackie! She was in love with him. But he went on and on about how he loved her against his will. About how he was afraid of being gay and what not. No 'I love you just the way you are' there, nope. So she couldn't tell him, she left."

"So that's why he, I mean she, left? Ham wouldn't tell me, he said he had said some things that had come out wrong, but then he closed like a clam."

"Yes, she had not planned for the charade to go on for so long, but she met Ham and fell in love. You know how it is."

"But why?! Why go through all that trouble just for a guy?"

"It was not just for him. Mainly it was for her mother who was, and in some way still is, so self absorbed that she didn't even notice that her only daughter wrote her letters on stationary with Rawley Academy for Boys-logo on it. And then, well, she never had the guts to tell him. The right moment never came." Will frowned. "Believe me, she tried!" Bella had to defend Jackie's actions.

"But still, to think of all the times we pranced around half naked in his, I mean her, presence. I feel like such an ass."

"You are the cutest ass ever!" Bella smiled flirtatiously towards her husband to be.

"Stop it! Ok so where do we go from here?" Will asked.

"I am quite sure that they are totally right for each other."

"Yeah, Ham did say something about Jacqueline being THE one."

"Excellent. I have a plan…"

-xXx-

Hamilton was still in bed when Will came back after the breakfast with Bella.

"Any better?" Will wondered.

"Nope, still same old story. An elephant sat on my head, Jake's a girl and I hate my life. You?"

"Ah, nothing much really. I ran in to Bella, though. It seems like she's extending her visit in New York with a few days."

"Good for you. I am glad your life is working out for ya. Now that my best high school experience turned out to be a freaking lie." He was so jealous of what Bella and Will had together, no deceit, no lies just plain and simple true love.

"Hamilton, just let it go. There's nothing you can do about it now, is it? The truth is out there."

"I can't handle the truth!" Hamilton who had been watching 'A few good men' couple of days ago exclaimed.

"That is painfully obvious. But still it is good to see that you can make a joke." Will tried a smile. Hamilton flashed a tired crooked smile.

"I think it might still be the rum talking." Hamilton sank down under the cover again. "What time is it?"

"Oh, it's nearly twelve."

"Oh, goodie, I can stay in bed a few more hours," Hamilton said and closed his eyes.

"You realize of course that you will have to face this eventually?" Will looked a bit worriedly at his friend.

"I know, Will, but not today, ok? Can I just be miserable today? And deal with the rest of my life later?"

"Ok, I guess. It's your life. But I'm thinking you might miss out. That is all…" Will said pointedly.

"What is another day of the rest of my life? It's not like there is anything I can do today that I couldn't tomorrow. Right?"

"If you say so." Will had planted the seed of doubt in Hamilton's head, just as planned. Hamilton looked as if he was thinking of his choices. Will just wondered when Hamilton was going to realize that Jake being a girl might be a good thing. It was so obvious that he still cared. They just needed to get to know one another again.

-xXx-

"Hey, Jackie?" Bella called as she got back. "You awake?"

"Silence… I kill you…" grunted Jacqueline from the sofa, to where she had managed to crawl just recently. Her head was killing her and the world had not quite stopped spinning. She stared unseeingly at the TV.

"Good, you're alive then."

"Barely," came Jacqueline's muffled reply.

"I've decided to stick around for a couple of more days."

"That's very nice of you, but quite unnecessary. I can take care of myself."

"I know that, but I've cleared with dad and Will's gonna be here a while longer as well. And face it; you need a friend right now. No matter how well you can take care of yourself. Period." Bella spoke a bit louder than intended.

"Ah, please, Bella, my poor head." Jacqueline threw her hands to her ears. "I can't take this right now, I don't need this right now."

"You have only yourself you blame."

"Oh why did I have to send that email to Hamilton? Good that did… Making him look at the photos again. Who would have thought he had an old picture of Jake at hand." Jacqueline rambled on to herself. "I'm so screwed."

"It's not the end of the world," Bella said briskly, trying to cheer her friend up.

"Just as I have happiness in my grasp I mess it up again. Stupid, stupid Jackie." Tears rose in her eyes, tears of frustration and self pity. "I hate my life."

"Move over," Bella said and squeezed herself down in the sofa next to Jacqueline, who moved as little as possible. Bella took her head in her lap and started playing with her hair. "It will be fine. Hamilton's gonna get over it eventually."

"Yeah, in like a million years maybe, and even then, he would never ever trust me again. I don't blame him," sobbed Jacqueline.

"There is no need for tears." Bella wiped Jacqueline's teary cheeks. "We just have to come up with an idea to win him back."

"It's not meant to be, Bella," Jacqueline sighed heavily, tears rolling down her cheeks. "But I cannot bear to think that he is out in the world thinking ill of me."

"You know he probably would have figured it out eventually? He is not stupid. Doesn't it feel better now that the truth is out?"

"Maybe, but now I've probably lost him forever." Jacqueline let out another sob.

-TBC-

**Reviews are always welcome!**


	7. All is Fair in Love and War

**Love; Lost and Found**

A _Young Americans_- story

By: jakeline

_Summary__: Jake/Jacqueline never told Hamilton her secret. Now they meet again 10 years later. How will Jacqueline tell Hamilton that Jake never really existed and that she was the boy he fell in love with? _

_Disclaimer__: I do not own the characters or the plot form 'Young Americans', but this story is mine. _

**Chapter 7****: All is Fair in Love and War**

"Ham, there's something I have to tell you. Bella said no, but I can't keep this from you." Will said at breakfast the next day. He had been ransacking his mind and found that he could not lie completely to Hamilton. It was not right. He had a right to know.

"What?" Hamilton looked up from his laptop and took a sip of his coffee.

"You know Bella's friend Jackie?"

"Yeah?"

"Well, that is Jacqueline aka Jake." Will dreaded the reaction, he didn't dare look at Hamilton.

"Of course it is," Hamilton said sarcastically. "Kinda makes sense actually. Does Jake, I mean Jacqueline, know that I know?" Hamilton had realized he had not answered her email. He didn't know what to do now. _I'll deal with that later. I'll figure something out._

"I think Bella had to tell her when I told her on the phone. She was at her apartment."

"Fine, whatever. I don't care." Hamilton stared at the computer and clenched his teeth. _Does Bella have to know her?_ _Of course she does…_ He remembered that she and Jake had been close. He had been jealous of Bella and her closeness with Jake. Now he realized that they had clicked on totally another level than him and Jake. Or at least he had thought he and Jake had clicked but now he knew it was all a lie.

"Bella found out during summer session that first summer. Fancy that?! How come we never saw through it?"

"Will, I. Don't. Care," Hamilton said doggedly. "I have to go, to work."

"That's ok. I'm meeting Bella for dinner later, if that is ok with you?"

"No problem, I will not be back until late anyways. Tell her I said hi." Hamilton took his kit and jacket and hurried out the door. He needed to think of something else for a while. He had been obsessing over Jake long enough. _It's finished. It's no more. There is no Jake. I will overcome this._

-xXx-

Jacqueline woke up rather early the next morning and decided to go for a run. She had not been jogging for a while and she needed some alone time to think things over. She left a note for Bella and promised bagels and coffee. The sunny May morning was crisp and Jacqueline breathed in the fresh air with delight. She started jogging along the side walk slowly but when she got to Central Park she increased the tempo. She wanted to be exhausted; she wanted her body to ache. Sweat started trickle down between her shoulders, her breathing became heavier and she felt alive. Her heart pounded to Linkin Park's _Runaway_ on her mp3-player.

She didn't like the fact that she and Hamilton were in the same city. Even though the risk of them running into each other was fairly small it was still there. She hoped he would leave soon.

Jacqueline had been happy with her life until Hamilton came barging in again. She had had a plan. Why had she taken that last job? If she hadn't Hamilton would still be happy unaware of the truth. She didn't know what to do now, where to go from here. There was no future for them together.

After a while she felt most of the frustration fizzle off her. She just had to accept that she and Hamilton will never be. The thought of the kiss in London still lingered in her thoughts. Her body rapidly responded to the memory and she urged her body forward, picking up speed as to make the memory fade away. She wouldn't admit that her body longed for his. The vivid memory of the pressure of his body against hers made her nearly let out a moan but she pushed forward even harder. She was soon out of breath and had to slow down. Sweat had formed a dark damp triangle on the chest of her grey tank top.

When she was almost back to where she had started she flopped down on a green patch to do some strengthening exercises. When she had finished she was completely exhausted and felt pretty good about herself. She made a mental note to do this more often.

Jacqueline remembered her promise of bagels and coffee she had left for Bella and started jogging nonchalantly towards the Starbucks near her flat.

-xXx-

Hamilton's stomach muscles tensed up as he saw an all too well known figure coming jogging towards him on the side walk. Jacqueline was wearing a tight grey tank top and black leggings and was obviously out for a morning run. Or had been, considering the dark damp patches on her top. For one minute he totally forgot who she was and what she had done and just admired her slender figure, long legs and all too obvious female body. His body was not late in its response to the sight in front of him. He drew a deep breath. She was gorgeous. There was no denying it. Her firm breasts were bouncing slightly as she moved. His mind wandered towards more intimate thoughts which included _two_ damp bodies. His heart started racing in his chest.

He suddenly realized he had stopped and was just standing staring at her. People around him started bumping into him on purpose muttering under their breaths. Which also led him realize that he had to move before she came any closer. She seemed caught up in thoughts in her own world and didn't appear to have noticed him yet. Hamilton quickly ducked into the nearest open door, peering out the window as she went by. He noticed she glanced over her shoulder, but he was almost sure she hadn't seen him.

How he ever could have taken her for a guy was now beyond his comprehension. She was all too female and he hated the fact that he found her attractive as hell. It made it so much harder for him to dislike her. There was no way in hell that he would ever forgive her for what she had put him through. What would even compel a fifteen year old girl to do that? And keeping up the charade for so long?

Hamilton was deep in thought when someone suddenly cleared their throat behind him. He was quickly thrown back to reality and swung around to meet the elderly clerk's amused eyes.

"Can I help you at all? Enjoying the view are we?" His dark eyes glittered with humor. "She comes past here all the time," he added with a smile.

"Uhm…" Hamilton quickly glanced around and found himself in a mini-mart. He picked up a package of gum. "I'll just have one of these."

"So, you liked the view?"

"Eh, well…" Hamilton blushed and did not know what to say.

"Well, you are not the only one. Many a young men has ducked in here to watch her in secret." The man behind the counter chuckled. Hamilton handed over some change as payment for the gum.

"Yeah, ok. Thank you for the loan of window," he said as he backed away from the clerk's curious eyes.

"Have a nice day!" the clerk called as Hamilton went out the door and rushed towards the subway.

-xXx-

Jacqueline's eyes widened, and then she squinted just to be sure. A well known figure dashed into a nearby open door. _Hamilton_. She could feel his gazes on her, but she continued on as if she had not seen him, but her heart started pounding a bit faster of the sight of his well built figure. Ah, to be in his arms. She quickly pushed the thought away. _No, stop it Jackie. There is no use in pining after him. Let him go!_ She threw a longing look over her shoulder as she went past the window. She saw his dark shadow behind the glass. If she only could figure out a way to talk to him and make him understand why she had done what she did. There was really no other explanation for her ploy to go on for so long other than her love for him. She had been very close in telling him time after time but as she was about to utter the words 'I am a girl' she either chickened out or was interrupted by someone who imposed on their solitude.

She considered the reunion once again. Hamilton would undoubtedly be present. Her problem lied with facing her former fellow students and that was not a tempting thought. Once again, and probably not for the last time, she regretted not telling Hamilton back then, regretted that she did not transfer to the girls' school when she had the chance and she almost regretted going to Rawley at all.

What Jacqueline did not know, was that her dear friend Bella had accepted the invitation on her behalf.

-xXx-

Hamilton had a hard time concentrating on his work that day. The image of a sweaty Jacqueline in tight training clothes haunted him ruthlessly. Usually the sight of half naked female bodies did not affect him that much, but this was different. His body actually yearned for hers. The more he tried to push the thoughts away the more insistent his brain kept flashing them before him. He tried to keep his thoughts occupied with work related tasks, but none of the models before him could tempt his desires. His cell phone suddenly rang. He saw on the caller id that it was his mother.

"Mom?" Hamilton said with questioning tone.

"Hi, Munchie," came her light voice over the line.

"Lay off the Munchie!" he grunted back and gestured for the crew to take five.

"So, when do I get to see my son's pretty face again?" his mother asked.

"At the reunion?" Hamilton suggested lightly, knowing too well that his mother would persuade him in coming earlier.

"Aw, but that's three weeks from now," said his mother disappointedly. "Can't you take a week off and get here early? I haven't seen you in months!"

"I have to check my schedule. But if you really want to it shouldn't be a problem."

"By the way," his mother said quickly, "you friend Jake?"

"Yes?" breathed Hamilton, eager to hear the continuation.

"Apparently he's coming to the reunion," his mother said.

"Really?" Hamilton was surprised. _How will she manage that? She can't come dressed like a boy this time, can she? _

"Yeah I got the answer slip today."

"I see."

"We'll talk more when you get here. There is something you need to know."

"What? Tell me now!" Hamilton demanded.

"No, I don't want to take this matter over the phone." Hamilton wondered what his mother was referring to. Were his parents getting a divorce or what?

"Fine," he finally answered. "Ok, I really have to go now, mom. See you soon, ok?"

"Yes, bye Munchie!" She hung up and left her son with even more thoughts of Jacqueline.

-xXx-

Kate Fleming was wondering why Jacqueline was coming to the reunion. There must be a reason for it; maybe she finally had decided to come clean about her charade in high school. Kate wondered if she ought to tell her husband about Jake aka Jacqueline's little scheme or not. She felt the need to tell someone before the reunion. She had already decided that Hamilton had the right to know.

Kate had been keeping the secret long enough, and she had to share it with someone else before telling her son. There was really only one person she knew she could trust with this. Finn. He had always been her confidant in matters she could not discuss with her husband, regardless of their romantic past. Finn had also been the boys' closest teacher back in the day. He would know what to do.

-xXx-

"Hey, Bella?" Jacqueline called as she got home after her run.

"Hey, Jackie," Bella answered and came out in the living room. "I was getting worried."

"I bring food and beverages." Jacqueline smiled and handed over the bag from Starbucks.

"Oh good! I'm starving! Feeling better today then, I take it?" Bella started unloading the continent of the bag on the table.

"Yeah, that run did me a lot of good." Jacqueline sat down in the sofa. "I saw him today."

"And?" Bella said with urging tone.

"And… Nothing, he darted into a mini-mart when he saw me. It's obvious he doesn't want anything to do with me." Jacqueline let out a sigh and took a bite of her bagel.

"That's so weird. I mean, why can't he be a man about it and just confront you? You would think you being a girl would be considered a good thing."

"Yes, yet again he surprises me! Does he know that I know that he knows?" Jacqueline giggled a little when she heard how awkward her question sounded.

"I think Will might have told him."

"Does Will know that I am your friend Jackie? I mean we have never met during all these years. Do you think he would tell Hamilton that you know me?" Jacqueline kept nibbling on her bagel.

"I have told Will about you being, you know, you. But I don't know if he has told Ham. Does it matter?" Bella took a sip of her coffee and looked up at Jacqueline with raised eyebrows.

"Guess not. He doesn't want to talk to me anyways as it seems. I don't blame him."

"So make him!"

"Bella, I cannot just jump him and force him to talk to me," giggled Jacqueline. "Not matter how tempting that might be."

"No, perhaps not, but I can arrange a meeting between you two," Bella suggested.

"Oh, Bella, when will you stop?"

"At your wedding day!"

"Can't you just accept that Ham and I will never be?" Jacqueline had finished her bagel and coffee and stood up to hit the shower. "Just leave it. I'm gonna take a shower."

"Ok, ok. If you say so," Bella surrendered for now. "But I still think you two would make the most adorable couple ever!"

"No, that would be you and Will," Jacqueline said before closing the bath room door. The thought of her jumping Hamilton stayed with her. _How can one man who clearly doesn't want to have anything to do with me have such an effect on me? _

-TBC-

**Reviews are**** most welcome, as always!**


	8. Come What May

**Love; Lost and Found**

A _Young Americans_- story

By: jakeline

_Summary__: Jake/Jacqueline never told Hamilton her secret. Now they meet again 10 years later. How will Jacqueline tell Hamilton that Jake never really existed and that she was the boy he fell in love with? _

_Disclaimer__: I do not own the characters or the plot form 'Young Americans', but this story is mine. _

**Chapter 8: Come what May**

"So are you in?" Bella asked Will at dinner.

"I don't feel totally ok with luring Ham out like that," Will answered. "Ham would kill me if he found out. He hasn't even told me the whole story yet."

"Typical men," Bella snorted. "You never share stuff."

"And you do?" Will asked.

"Yes we do, between ourselves. Not necessarily between men and women… " Bella smiled. "We have to have some mystery about us, how else will you boys stay interested?"

"But how do you know that they are right for each other?" Will asked. Bella knew he had a point, but she had to believe that love conquers all.

"They love each other for starters. That must count for something," Bella said.

"Yeah, ten years ago when Ham thought Jake was a guy, he loved HIM," Will pointed out, though he knew Hamilton was interested in Jacqueline, he knew that Ham would not forgive her easily for deceiving him.

"What has happened to my Mr. Romantic?" Bella asked with a frown.

"We have to be realistic here, babe. Seriously Bella, do you really believe this could work out?"

"I know that it is a small possibility that it won't work but then we have the reunion."

"And exactly how will you convince Jackie to go to the reunion?"

"I don't know. I will figure it out. Don't you want Ham to be happy?"

"Yes, of course! But I am not sure he's ready to forgive Jake. Hell, I am not ready to forgive her. And I am the understanding one!" Will exclaimed. "It's gonna bother me for a while."

"What are you saying? You don't think it's a good idea at all?" Bella looked at him with disappointment in her eyes.

"I actually don't know," Will sighed. He didn't want to argue over this with her. He just wanted to enjoy a nice dinner with his girlfriend.

"Fine," Bella said and pursed her mouth.

"Aw, don't be like that!" Will said.

"Can we just try it?" Bella said with begging puppy eyes and pouting lips. "They need to meet and talk things out anyhow."

Will sighed. He knew she was right. "You are right. Of course."

"I know!" Bella's face lit up again. "So we take them out on Friday, call it a goodbye dinner or something."

"Yeah, ok." Will took her hand across the table. "You like being the match maker don't you?"

"You know, Jackie was the one who convinced me to go for you."

"Is that why you want her and Ham to get together?"

"Yes, partially anyway. I want them to be as happy as we are."

"I guess there is no harm in trying."

-xXx-

"Don't make plans on Friday, Jackie, I'm taking you to dinner," Bella said as she came home from her dinner with Will.

"Uh, ok," Jacqueline answered as she looked up from her laptop. She had been programming her new web page for her business and was happy for the interruption. She had been staring at the screen for hours.

"Yeah I'm leaving on Saturday so, I want to do something for you before I go."

"You don't have to, you know," Jacqueline objected.

"I know, but I want to," Bella answered with a sly smile. "So how's the web page coming?"

"Oh, just fine," Jacqueline smiled. "So, how was Will?" She could see that Bella was in a great mood.

"He was great! I cannot believe I still miss him like crazy as soon as he has been gone a few days." Bella blushed.

"But that's how it should be! I envy you," Jacqueline said sincerely. She did envy them. She longed for having that closeness with somebody. Her biological clock had started ticking and she had recently started thinking about babies. It was not because friends around her had started reproducing in any larger extent, but something inside her was telling her it was time. "So, have you two love birds set a date yet?"

"No, not yet. I believe we have to wait until Will has been out on his promotion tour. I'm guessing like next year or so," Bella answered dejectedly.

"And children?" Jacqueline watched her intensely.

"In due time. You have to have sex to make babies, remember?" Bella snorted. "And with him being away all the time, well, you get the picture."

"Yes, I imagine it may be a problem."

"Oh, well, hopefully things will slow down soon," Bella said with a half smile. "What about you? Do you want children?"

"Yes, I do want children soon." Jacqueline laughed. "I just don't seem to be able to find anyone who wants children with me."

"Really?" Bella looked surprised.

"What? Don't look so surprised, Bella. Just because I am a career woman it doesn't mean I don't want children."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean…" Bella looked regretful.

Jacqueline cut her off: "It's ok, don't worry about it." It was not the first time people had questioned her want of children.

"How long have you felt this way?"

"Not very long, a year maybe. I just don't want to end up like my mom."

"I thought you and your mom got along now?" Bella said.

"We do, but still, we have never had anything in common. Sometimes I feel she just had me because it was expected of her. Not because she wanted me."

"Oh, Jackie, I'm sure that is not true."

"I don't doubt she loves me, but as you know she is not what you call a typical mother. I was basically raised by Consuela you know."

"And my mother?" demanded Bella. "She left us when I was like seven to live with someone else. Someone who later turned out to be my real dad. Seriously, Jackie, you are not the only one with messed up family."

"I know, but you had Charlie. I had no one."

"But what happened to your dad?" Bella asked. They had never talked about Jacqueline's dad, more than he was dead.

"He died." Jacqueline was a bit hesitant. She didn't even know the whole truth about his death.

"If you don't want to talk about it, tell me," Bella said.

"You know, my mom has never told me the whole story. But he died when I was little. I have very vague memories of him. But that's all. She says I look like him though. I do think she loved him very much."

"I'm sorry, Jackie," Bella said and took Jacqueline's hand.

"It's ok. I've managed not to know so far, I will manage a bit more. But remind me to have a chat with my mom about it someday. I think I deserve to know." Jacqueline laughed. "Time to go to bed I think."

"Yeah, it's been a long day." Bella hugged Jacqueline tightly. "I just hope that you one day will be as happy and in love as I am!"

-xXx-

"How was dinner with Bella?" Hamilton asked as Will came back that night.

"Great!" Will answered. "We have decided to leave for New Rawley on Saturday so don't make any plans for Friday! I'm taking you to dinner."

"It's not a date, is it?" Hamilton grinned sheepishly. A memory of a Jake before the cotillion that first summer session at Rawley flashed before his eyes. His face darkened. _It's a date…_

"God, Hammie, of course not!" Will laughed nervously. "Why do you ask?"

"Oh, nothing," Hamilton answered. He could not tell him what he was thinking at the moment.

**.:Flashback:.**

It was their turn to stash up the equipment after crew practice. As Hamilton was turning with one of the oars he accidentally whacked Jake in the ribs.

"Ow!" Jake exclaimed.

"Oh, dude, sorry you all right?" Hamilton asked quickly. Jake held a hand over his left side.

"Yeah, I'm tougher than I look, I'm fine," he answered putting on a brave face. It must hurt like hell, Hamilton thought. "So, are you renting or do you own?" Jake asked out of the blue.

"Neither. Still mooching of the parentals," Hamilton answered, thinking Jake meant his housing situation.

"I meant tuxedo," chuckled Jake.

"Oh, for the Cotillion?" Hamilton looked over at Jake, wondering if Jake had a date. "I'm gonna do the dinner jacket thing. You know, like Boagie in Casablanca."

"Not bad."

"You?" Hamilton watched Jake in wait for his answer. _Please don't say you have a date._

"Don't know." Jake fiddled with his head set. "If I go at all it'll probably be a drop by solo kind of thing." Hamilton exhaled; he hadn't realized he had been holding his breath.

"Yeah, me too, solo," he said nonchalantly. He looked away as to hide his relieved expression.

"Could be fun," said Jake and Hamilton could feel his eyes on him.

"Yeah, lots of chicks in taffeta." Jake laughed at that statement, then he became silent.

"Um," Jake started, then hesitated, but continued: "why don't we just go solo together?" Hamilton glanced over at Jake. Was he serious? He didn't know what to say.

"Yeah, ok," he finally said after thinking it over. He didn't want Jake to go with anyone else so, there was really nothing else for him to do.

"Great! It's a date," Jake said with a satisfied smile. Hamilton froze_. A date?_ Jake shook his hand in their usual way and strolled off before Hamilton could say anything to take him out of the notion that they had a date.

**.:End flashback:.**

They hadn't gone together. Lena, the Cali-chick, had asked if Hamilton had a date and since he didn't want anyone to get the wrong idea about him and Jake he had said he was free. Jake had interrupted them just as they were settling things about the Cotillion. Hamilton still remembered Jake's disappointed face as he realized that Hamilton had found a date. Jake had decided not to go since 'the only person he had his eye on was going with someone else'; as Hamilton remembered he had put it. Jake never came to the Cotillion, and for a few days afterwards Hamilton remembered he had been quiet and avoided Hamilton.

Now, considering the recent events, he realized why. What would have happened if Hamilton had turned Lena down and stayed true to his word? Had Jake told him then?

"Hamilton?" Will drew his attention back to reality.

"Yeah?"

"You seem so distracted lately," Will said.

"Yeah, I know, it's the whole Jake-being-a-girl-thing," Hamilton excused himself. "I'm just so frustrated! She had all the time in the world to tell me, but didn't!" He sighed.

"Maybe she had a good reason not to?" Will suggested. Hamilton glanced at him. _Can I tell him? _

"Yes, you are right. She probably had a good reason." Hamilton's speech about loving her against his will. "It makes me a bit sad that she didn't trust me enough when she was so quick in telling Bella," Hamilton said with a frown.

"Bella says she saw through her and confronted Jackie on the spot."

"Have you been discussing this with Bella?" Hamilton looked both shocked and angry. "You have no business talking about this with her!"

"Ham, chill out! We merely discussed the fact of Jake being a girl, nothing more. Except when Bella told me that she knew and had been friends with her ever since… " Will let the sentence hang unfinished in the air.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to lash out at you," Hamilton said. "I think it's time to call it a night."

"Yeah, you're right," Will said. "I'm off to my room then."

"Good night, Will."

"Night." Will disappeared into one of the suit's two bedrooms. Hamilton sighed. Had he been so wrong in turning his back at Jacqueline now that he knew the truth? He glanced over at his laptop. The image of a jogging Jacqueline came to his mind once more. _Maybe I should send over some pictures after all…_

-TBC-

**I like reviews! ;) You are all so sweet to me! **


	9. Good Things Come to Those Who Wait

**Love; Lost and Found**

A _Young Americans_- story

By: jakeline

_Summary__: Jake/Jacqueline never told Hamilton her secret. Now they meet again 10 years later. How will Jacqueline tell Hamilton that Jake never really existed and that she was the boy he fell in love with? _

_Disclaimer__: I do not own the characters or the plot form 'Young Americans', but this story is mine. _

**Chapter 9: ****Good Things Come to Those Who Wait**

As Jacqueline opened her inbox the next morning she found a mail from Hamilton. She rubbed her eyes in disbelief. She stared at the screen, not sure whether she should open it or not. It was a reply to the mail she had sent him.

She was still sitting in the same position with her coffee mug half way to her mouth when Bella came in ten minutes later.

"Jackie?" Bella asked when she saw her friend's motionless staring.

"Huh?" Jacqueline looked up, a bit startled.

"Good morning," Bella said.

"Yes, morning," Jacqueline replied with her gaze back at the screen. "What do you reckon?" She turned the laptop so that Bella could see the screen.

"Eh, ok?" Bella said slowly. "So Hamilton finally answered your mail?"

"Yeah, just a week late… "

"Well then, open it!" Bella commanded.

"Do I really want to see what's inside?"

"It looks like some attachment in any case. Don't you want to see your pictures?"

"Yes, but what if he has written something nasty? Like 'I really, really hate you I do not want to see you ever again!' Do I really want to read that?" Jacqueline looked up at Bella. "You read it!"

"No, it's your mail, I can't read it," Bella said.

"Please?" Jacqueline looked at her with pleading eyes. "I'll read it if it's not a hate-letter, promise."

Bella sighed: "Fine," and took the laptop and sat down with it on her knee. She clicked the email open and read its content.

"Well?" Jacqueline demanded when she saw that Bella was finished.

"Read it yourself," Bella said and handed the laptop back to her.

"Do I want to read it?" Jacqueline looked anxiously at Bella, who smiled reassuringly.

"Yes, you want to read it." Jacqueline looked at the screen and braced herself for what she was about to read.

_To:__ Jacqueline_

_From:__ Hamilton_

_Subject:__ Re: Re: the photo shoot_

_Hey, Jacqueline, _

_Sorry for the late reply__, it's been some hectic days. I enclose a few pics for you; the rest will be forwarded to your agent. Need I say that I am very pleased with how they turned out? _

_About me coming to New York, well I am here… But due to recent unfolding of secrets I am sure you understand when I say that I need some time. I'll just see you at the reunion. OK? I'm not angry, just a bit frustrated and confused. Why didn't you tell me? _

_//Hamilton. _

Jacqueline sighed: "See, he doesn't want to see me!" She clicked on the attachment to download the pictures. Then she realized what he had written. "But, wait, I'm not going to the reunion!" Jacqueline looked over at a giggling Bella with large questioning eyes. "What?"

"I might have sent in the rsvp-slip saying that you were going," Bella said with an apologetically look on her face.

"You did WHAT?!" Jacqueline looked dumbfounded.

"I'm sorry, but, you don't have to go," Bella said, looking really sorry about what she had done.

"Bella, what the hell were you thinking?! How did you think I would manage that? I'm invited as Jake Pratt, not Jacqueline!" Jacqueline's face turned red with frustration. What the hell had Bella been thinking?

"I just thought you needed a push."

"I said I didn't need your help! I was just going to forget the whole Hamilton-thing and go on with my life," Jacqueline said with raised voice. "You had no right!" She looked angrily over at Bella.

"Jackie, it's not a big deal!" Bella tried to calm her down.

"But now I have to go, Hamilton wants to meet me there, although I'm not the one who attended Rawley. I cannot dress up as Jake again; my body kinda blossomed after high school you know!" Jacqueline looked down at her chest. "It's not like I can hide these anymore." She gestured towards her breasts. "God, Bella!" Her eyes filled up with tears of frustration.

"I'm sorry," Bella whispered.

"I have to get out of here. I feel like I can't breathe!" Jacqueline went for the door and hopped into a pair of sneakers, took her jacket and left the flat. Her sight was blurred with tears. She was really upset with the decision Hamilton had made, though she had told herself that he didn't want to see her after the secret was out, there had always been a faint glimmer of hope down deep inside of her. A faint hope of him understanding her choice. But now she didn't know what to think. He wanted to meet her at the reunion, among his family and friends. How would she manage that? She had less than two weeks to figure something out.

Jacqueline hurried down the side walk without seeing where she was going. Suddenly she bumped into someone and nearly fell over, but a strong arm caught her before she hit the ground. A familiar scent found her nostrils. _Hamilton._

-xXx-

She looked like she had just woken up after a long night's sleep. Tear filled hazel eyes blinked up at him and met his piercing blue. A pang of guilt rushed through his body; she must have seen his email by now. His arm was still around her tiny waist. It was torture being so close to her and not kiss her. Her scent nearly drove him crazy.

"Hamilton," she breathed with a hand on his chest. He was sure she could feel his heart beat rapidly beneath the shirt he was wearing. He couldn't find anything to say. As soon as she had regained her balance he let go of her waist as if she was burning hot. His body sent him mixed signals. He both wanted to stay close to her and just get the hell away from her. Now was not the time to begin a conversation about the past.

"I'm sorry," was all he found to say. She looked into his eyes, as if searching for something. "I can't do this." Her eyes narrowed. He backed away from her; he had to get away before he did something they'd both regret. He turned away from her and tried not to look back. She had looked so vulnerable, pale and even fragile. Hamilton had to restrain himself not to rush back and scoop her in his arms and never let her go again.

-xXx-

Jacqueline turned back home in a complete daze. The way he had been looking at her. Pain and sorrow had shot out of his radiant blue eyes. His scent still lingered in the air around her. The feeling of his arm around her waist. She had felt so safe in his arms. Just to be near him made her body burn with desire. She hoped he would listen to what she had to say at the reunion. Hopefully he would forgive her then. He looked so hurt and confused. _Adorable_. She wanted to run after him and just hold him forever. Tell him that everything would be alright. Tell him that she loved him like a mad woman. But she had to play along with his rules now. He had asked to see her at the reunion and that was what she'd do. No matter what.

-xXx-

"Do you know where Bella is staying?" Hamilton asked as he came back to the hotel.

"A couple of blocks from here," Will answered without looking up from his laptop. "Why?"

"I seem to run into Jacqueline a lot," Hamilton answered with a frown.

"And?" Will looked up at him.

"I'm not ready to face her. I told her we could meet at the reunion in the email I sent her."

"You emailed her?" Will looked surprised.

"Yeah, yesterday after you went to bed. I realized it would seem rather inconsiderate not to send the pictures she had been asking for."

"True, but I didn't think you wanted anything to do with her."

"I may be angry with her, but I'm not a jerk," Hamilton replied with a hint of a smile playing on his lips.

"When are you going to tell me what happened between you two?" Will asked urgently.

"It's not that much to tell really. I said some ill-chosen words after confessing I loved him. I was just so confused about my feelings towards him. Afraid of what others, you lot, would think about us being gay," Hamilton said with sadness in his voice.

"Do you really think we would have cared?" Will asked.

"Yeah, I thought so then, now I know you wouldn't but everything just felt wrong. I hurt his feelings; I told him I loved him against my will. I didn't want to be gay. And then he said he was straight. That's why he, I mean she, didn't tell me. I blew it. If I had just…" Hamilton sighed. "I convinced her to spend the night with me, 'no touching,' she demanded and we fell asleep next to each other. Next morning when I woke up she was gone," Hamilton finished with another deep sigh. The meeting with Jacqueline a few moments earlier had shocked him quite a bit. Feelings he thought he could never feel towards her had risen again. Hamilton looked down at his hands.

"You still care for her." It was not a question it was a statement. Hamilton looked up, feeling his cheeks turning red.

"No," he exclaimed at first, but then realized the truth. It dawned on him like lighting from a clear sky. "I think I do," he confessed. "But how can I trust her? Everything from our past was a lie!"

"Bella says she has always been the same, maybe you just need to talk to each other…"

Hamilton cut him off: "No! Not yet. I will see her at the reunion."

"And you are sure she will come?"

"Yes," Hamilton said resolutely. "If she cares about what we had she will be there."

-xXx-

Kate Fleming waited for Finn by the docks after crew practice. It had been some time since they had spoken to each other.

"Mrs. Fleming?" Finn looked at her with quizzically dark blue eyes. "I haven't seen you in these parts in a while." He smiled. Kate tossed her blond locks and felt the familiar tension in her stomach. He still made her feel like a teenager though she had been married for 30 years. Finn's hair was turning gray and he had lately let his beard grow.

"Yeah, well, there's something I have to talk to you about. Something no one else must know."

"Walk with me and I might tell you who the father of cubism is," he said with a joking tone in his voice. She smiled. It was an old joke they had shared since high school. "So what's on your mind?" He asked as they were in a safe distance from curious ears.

"You know the reunion for class of 2000 is coming up?" She heard how distressed she sounded and breathed deeply as to calm herself down.

"Yeah, Hamilton's year, right? Is he coming home soon?"

"Yes, I think he will arrive next weekend." Kate smiled when she thought of her greatest accomplishment. "Well, ok here's the deal. Remember Jake Pratt?"

"Yeah, dark, small, good student, straight A's if I remember correctly?" Finn said.

"Yes, that's the one. There's something I never told anyone." Kate looked up at Finn. "I don't know what to do anymore. I haven't even told my husband."

"Really?" Finn looked surprised.

"Yeah, well I promised not to tell. Jake is a girl," she blurted out, just to have it over with.

"Come again?" Finn stopped abruptly in a step.

"Jake Pratt is a girl, has always been. She played up a sweet little charade in high school, fooling us all, including Hamilton." Kate sighed. There it was said.

"That explains a few things," Finns said thoughtfully.

"And now, she's coming to the reunion."

"So?"

"I don't want to put Hamilton through that. I was the one who helped him last time she disappeared. He was heartbroken. I don't really know what happened. Jake told me that she was coming clean to Hamilton, but something went wrong. I never had the heart to ask Hamilton about it. Imagine what finding out that she is a girl would do to him!"

"Don't you think that's his choice?" Finn asked.

"Not if I can't help it!" Kate said heatedly.

"So, what are you going to do? Ban Jake from the reunion? You can't do that."

"I know that, I just talk to Hamilton when he gets here."

"Kate, there's nothing you can do. You must let him make his own mistakes. He's not 15 anymore." Finn put a hand on her arm. "It's going to be fine. Don't worry."

"Let them figure things out themselves?" Kate looked at him. "I should think not!"

"Kate, you can tell Hamilton if you like, but you cannot forbid Jake from coming here. You must let Hamilton live his own life."

"You're not helping," she said in a sort of singsong voice. This was not the response she had been expecting. How could he be so forgiving?

"It's in the past, Kate. I'm sure Jake has a good reason for coming here. If not to set things straight. You too have made some mistakes in your time, Kate. Did anyone ban you from anything?"

"This is not the same! She fooled the whole school, you, me, my husband! It was fraud. A crime," Kate was nearly screaming with agitation.

"And you and me in the boat house?" Finn asked meaningly.

"You and I in the boat house," she corrected without thinking.

"So, you DO remember. You are not flawless, my dear Kate. Leave Hamilton to discover his own true path in the world. You cannot protect him forever." Finn looked at his watch. "Got to go." He waved good bye and left Kate alone on the lawn. She was frustrated with Finn not taking her side, but deep down she knew he was right. She couldn't protect Hamilton anymore. The fact that Jacqueline was coming to reunion might be a good thing after all. Then Hamilton would find out himself of what sort of person Jake really was. When he found out the truth he wouldn't forgive Jacqueline, Kate thought with a sly smile. Good riddance.

-TBC-

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	10. Relight My Fire

**Love; Lost and Found**

A _Young Americans_- story

By: jakeline

_Summary__: Jake/Jacqueline never told Hamilton her secret. Now they meet again 10 years later. How will Jacqueline tell Hamilton that Jake never really existed and that she was the boy he fell in love with? _

_Disclaimer__: I do not own the characters or the plot form 'Young Americans', but this story is mine. _

**Chapter 10: Relight My Fire**

"I am really sorry I yelled at you!"

"I'm so sorry I accepted the invitation for you!" Bella and Jacqueline said almost at the same time when Jacqueline came back home. Jacqueline ran over and hugged Bella tightly.

"I had no right," Bella said.

"No, but I probably needed a nudge in the right direction." Jacqueline smiled.

"Friends?" Bella asked and released Jacqueline from her embrace.

"Friends." Jacqueline held out a hand with a broad smile.

"Good. So we're still on for dinner tomorrow?"

"Yup."

"Great," Bella beamed.

"I think this calls for a shopping-spree!" Jacqueline smiled. "I'm gonna need something for the reunion anyways"

"I bet we're gonna find something breathtaking so that Hammie-boy can't take his eyes off of you!" Bella and Jacqueline put shoes and jackets on and left the flat. Jacqueline suddenly looked concerned.

"But how does he know I'm going to the reunion?" Jacqueline looked at Bella with a puzzled face.

"I don't know. I haven't told him," Bella assured her.

"Have you told Will?" Jacqueline looked at Bella.

"Yes, but I don't think he has told Hamilton about that," Bella said truthfully.

"Then how does he know?" Jacqueline looked puzzled. "He must have called his father or someone at the school. But why?"

"Maybe he asked about Jake, before he found out?"

"Yeah, maybe. That means he has talked to his mother, of course. Shit." Jacqueline's eyes widened with concern.

"Why is that so bad?"

"I'm pretty sure she does not like me that much. I'm not really daughter-in-law-material in her eyes since I fooled a whole school back in the day. What if she tells him that I told her?" Jacqueline looked worriedly over at Bella. "Hamilton would so not like that." Hamilton's face flickered through her mind. _Shit, shit, shit._ She really needed to speak with him before he met his mother.

-xXx-

The sadness in Jacqueline's face and eyes haunted Hamilton. He realized that she had never intentionally meant to hurt him. The only thing that was still hurting was that she had not trusted him enough to tell him. Not even in her note. His frustration was wearing off and he was starting to look forward to meet her at the reunion. The sensation of her body pressed against his was too much. The frustration was turning into desire. A burning want of holding her close and breathe in her scent, kiss her and hug her. Love her.

-xXx-

"So, Will and Ham are staying quite near my flat?" Jacqueline asked after a while.

"Yes, why?" Bella glanced over at her.

"Bumped into Hamilton when I was out. Literally."

"And?"

"And he backed away and said 'I can't do this'." Jacqueline sighed. "Why can't he just talk to me? All this bumping into him is driving me crazy! There was unwanted bodily contact today!"

"Unwanted?" Bella smirked meaningly.

"On his part anyways, I nearly fell and he caught me."

"A knight in shining armor?" Bella giggled.

"Hardly. He let go of me as if he got burned," snorted Jacqueline. His blue eyes filled with pain flickered through her mind again, his muscular body pressed against hers set her blood on fire.

"Well, we're gonna find you a gorgeous dress and make you look awesome and then he'll be sorry he hasn't made a move on you sooner!" Bella laughed.

"Yeah, right. We'll have to see about that. I just wish I told him sooner. Then we wouldn't be in this situation."

"It's in the past, Jackie, nothing you can do about it now. Now let's focus on the present and the future!"'

"You're right. Now let's find a killer dress that will make Ham forget that I ever dressed up as a boy!" Jacqueline laughed; she pushed away the troublesome thoughts about Kate Fleming for the moment.

-xXx-

"You ready soon, Ham?" Will called as the time drew nearer seven on Friday.

"Yeah." Hamilton came out of his bedroom dressed in dark jeans and a white shirt. "Is this ok or do I need a suit?" He raised an eyebrow quizzically.

"You're fine," Will said. "It's not like we're going on a date." Will sniggered at Hamilton's darkened face. "I'm kidding, Hamilton! Don't take everything so seriously!"

"I'm not! So where are you taking me anyways?" Hamilton asked as he put on a black leather jacket.

"I was in the mood for Italian. I hope that's ok."

"Yeah, no problem." Hamilton wondered what Jacqueline was up to on a night like this. He shook his head and pushed the thoughts away. He was not going to let that bother him tonight. His body and mind was in conflict. His heart screamed YES but his brain yelled NO. What was a man to do?

-xXx-

"You look great," Bella said as Jacqueline emerged from her bedroom. She was wearing a black halter necked dress, with deep v-cut and half bare back that fitted her like a glove. It hugged her gorgeous body tightly and ended a bit above the knee. A small diamond glittered on a thin necklace around her neck and her ears had matching earrings. Her eyes were shaded with black, her cheeks glowing and her mouth glistening with red gloss. "No wonder you became a top model!" Bella remarked and Jacqueline laughed softly looking down at herself feeling rather good.

"Ah well, I did learn a few tricks of the trade. By the way, you should talk!" Jacqueline gestured to Bella's appearance in a midnight blue dress that fitted her perfectly, low cut with thin straps to hold it up and a wide skirt with black taffeta underneath. She had put her long blond hair up in a loose bun and strings of hair played around her delicate face.

"Aw, this old thing?" Bella giggled and blushed a little.

"Oh, please! You bought it yesterday!" Jacqueline said mockingly.

"I have always wanted to say that! Ok, you ready?"

"In a moment," Jacqueline replied and went into her bedroom again and came back with a pair of black high heeled pumps. "Now I'm ready! So where are we going?"

"I found a cute little French restaurant not far from here, and then Joe's for drinks and perhaps some dancing?"

"Sounds great!" Jacqueline smiled. She needed something else than Hamilton to think about. He was preoccupying her thoughts most of her waking hours and came to her in her dreams. Until the reunion she was not to think about him at all.

-xXx-

Hamilton and Will was finishing their tiramisu when Will's cell beeped, indicating a text message.

_Are you ready for drinks? We're going to Joe's in half an hour. XOXO, Bella. _

"What?" Hamilton asked, as Will sent a reply to the message.

"Oh nothing," Will said nonchalantly. Hamilton peered suspiciously at him, but said nothing. His head was filled with almost irresistible images of Jacqueline. The reunion felt a life time away. He needed to get away from New York and fast. He was not sure how long he could keep a clear head. He could most definitely not concentrate when she was only a few blocks away.

"Are you and Bella going to New Rawley directly tomorrow?" he asked.

"Yeah." Will was still typing on his cell.

"Is it ok if I tag along?"

"I thought you weren't going for another week?" Will looked at Hamilton with a puzzled face.

"Change of plan. I need a change of scenery. Clear the head before the reunion."

"I see. I'll ask Bella, but I'm sure there won't be a problem. Maybe we can rent a car. Do the road trip version."

"Yeah, why not? I haven't seen Bella for a while. Could be fun!"

"I'll call her and see what she says, ok?"

"No problem. I need to use the gents anyway." Hamilton rose and left the table. In the bathroom he splashed his face with cold water. _Get a grip, man!_ He said to his reflection in the mirror. Thick dark lashes framed the intensive blue eyes that stared back at him. He shook his head. _What the hell am I doing? Why can't I just talk to her? _

-xXx-

"Who are you texting?" Jacqueline asked when she got back from the ladies. Their chocolate soufflés had just arrived and she dug in with large appetite.

"Oh, no one," Bella smiled and tried to look normal.

"You know you are the worst liar, right?" Bella's face turned red on the remark.

"Ok, fine. I sent Will a message telling him to stay clear of Joe's since you don't want to meet Ham." Bella pouted.

"I don't have a problem with seeing him. He is the one with the problem." Just hearing his name sent shivers down her spine. She found herself wondering what he was wearing. Who was she kidding? She couldn't stop thinking about him. Her thoughts were interrupted by Bella's phone which started ringing. Bella's cheeks turned red with excitement when she saw the caller id.

"Oh! It's Will! I got to take this!" Jacqueline just nodded and gestured towards her to go. Bella hurried away through the tables in the restaurant.

-xXx-

"Hey, Bella," came Will's voice over the line.

"Hey, babe, what's up?"

"Hamilton wants to tag along home to New Rawley tomorrow. I thought we could rent a car."

"Ok, did he say why?"

"He needs a change of scenery, but I think that the closeness to Jackie is driving him crazy. He doesn't know how to handle that yet." Bella giggled.

"That's good! I don't mind him tagging along! Do you fix a car?"

"Yes, leave that to me. Still on for drinks and some intentionally bumping?" Will chuckled.

"Oh, yeah. I long to see you, darling. See you in a bit!"

-xXx-

Will hung up his phone just as Hamilton returned from the bathroom.

"So what did she say?" Hamilton asked.

"No problem as I told you." Will put the last spoonful of tiramisu in his mouth. "This was so good. I haven't eaten like this in a while."

"I'm surprised you aren't bigger when thinking of the amount of food you can pile in," Hamilton smiled.

"Sometimes I surprise myself!" Will laughed. "So drinks?" Will gestured for the check towards a waiter.

"Yeah, that would be nice." Hamilton smiled. Everything was going to be fine, as soon as he left the city and Jacqueline behind him. As Will had paid they took their jackets and left the restaurant. They didn't have to walk far before they were at the club. They were lucky there was not a queue, it was a popular club, but they were rather early. They made their way to the bar and ordered beers. Hamilton looked around as he stood hanging on the bar. Lots of chicks to look at, but none of them had the slightest impact on him. Although they tried their best to get his attention, their efforts were worthless. He had only one woman in his head. Jacqueline.

The bar was getting crowed and Will was looking for someone.

"Who are you looking for?" Hamilton shouted over the music.

"I thought Bella would be here," Will answered without thinking.

"So, she and Jackie are coming here?" _Why am I not surprised?_

"Maybe," Will tried to seem nonchalant about it.

"That's my cue to leave," Hamilton said and put his beer down. He could not believe he had fallen for this.

"No, Hamilton, please don't go. I'll tell them to go somewhere else!" Will looked anxious.

"Too late," Hamilton said as he saw Bella and Jacqueline walking down the stairs. Jacqueline took his breath away. She looked stunning in a black tight fitting dress that didn't leave too much to the imagination. Her half messy dark hair was pinned back with glittering hairpins. Hamilton could say nothing.

"Wow," he heard Will gasping beside him before he rushed over to his girlfriend's side. Jacqueline's eyes locked with Hamilton's and he gasped for air. He didn't know what to do. She was walking over to him on high heels and seductively swaying hips. His body was on fire. He took the bottle again and gulped down the rest of his beer to cool himself off.

-xXx-

"I thought you told them to stay out of Joe's," Jacqueline whispered to Bella when she spotted Will and Hamilton by the bar. Bella's cheeks turned red and she looked at Jacqueline with pleading eyes.

"I'm sorry; I just wanted to see Will. And we have to talk about our trip home tomorrow," Bella replied. "Admit that you want to see Hamilton once more before he leaves."

"He's leaving?" Jacqueline looked surprised. Of course he could not stay in town for ever, but she had not had the chance to speak to him yet. She really needed to speak with him before the reunion

"Yeah, he's tagging along home to New Rawley with me and Will," Bella said. "Apparently you are driving him crazy," she added with a smile.

"Yes well, I was not expecting to see him tonight." Deep inside she was glad to see him. Perhaps now they could have that talk. She felt the familiar flutter in her stomach. She wanted to be near him again. To breath in his scent, kiss him… Love him.

"Then who did you dress up for?" Bella asked innocently.

"Myself," Jacqueline giggled. _I am such a liar! I was hoping to run into Ham again. _

"Yeah, right!" Bella snorted, and then she saw her boyfriend. "Oh, Will!" Bella hurried over to her boyfriend and left Jacqueline behind. Jacqueline looked over at Hamilton and their gazes locked. She drew a deep breath. He looked dashing in a white shirt and dark jeans that showed off his great body. He made her feel like a school girl again, and not the soon 29-year-old she was. She started moving towards him, swinging her hips as she went. She kept his gaze and her glossy red lips turned into a small coy smile. _You do not know what you are missing, Hammie-boy. Let's relight the fire… _

-TBC-

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	11. Lightning Crashes

**Love; Lost and Found**

A _Young Americans_- story

By: jakeline

_Summary__: Jake/Jacqueline never told Hamilton her secret. Now they meet again 10 years later. How will Jacqueline tell Hamilton that Jake never really existed and that she was the boy he fell in love with? _

_Disclaimer__: I do not own the characters or the plot form 'Young Americans', but this story is mine. _

**Chapter ****11: Lightning Crashes**

Hamilton could not take his eyes off of the beautiful creature that was coming towards him. He found himself having trouble breathing properly and he swallowed repeatedly as to clear his throat. His heart pounded in his chest. He couldn't deny his feelings any longer. Not to himself at least. To the rest of the world he had to remain unbothered by Jacqueline. Her smile grew wider as she came closer and observed his predicament. The effect she had on him was greater than he could have thought. His gut tightened. He had still not forgiven her completely but he was willing to at least speak to her. Even though he had said they'd meet at the reunion. But there she was, in all her glory, he couldn't just be silent.

She must know what an impact she made on every male in the club. Most eyes where set on her and followed her as she walked over to Hamilton. He felt singled out. He was overpowered by a sudden urge to make love to her then and there. The thought made his cheeks burn.

"We have to stop meeting like this," she said with husky voice as she came to a stop right in front of him. Her perfume filled the air and made Hamilton's head spin. He forced himself to smile politely, though all he wanted was to rip that dress off her body.

"Hello, _Jake_," Hamilton said sardonically with emphasis on the Jake-part. She puckered her brows slightly at the remark.

But she just smiled ever so sweetly and said, with the silkiest of voices: "Hello, Munchie." She glanced very coolly at him with one raised eyebrow and then turned to the bartender. _Game on_, he thought.

-xXx-

She knew how much he hated to be called 'Munchie' but when he called her Jake she hadn't much choice but to play the game. She was not going to give in that easily. She turned to the bartender.

"A Cosmo," she ordered. She placed herself next to Hamilton with her back turned on the bar. At least he is not running away. Jacqueline took a sip of her drink and glanced over at Hamilton's grim looks and clenched teeth. Hamilton turned and ordered another beer. She realized what impact she had on him and that made her feel a bit superior in the game. He on the other hand had no idea of what feelings and thoughts were stirring in her body. She had a very hard time to keep her cool look and not to just throw herself at him. She could feel the warmth of his body next to her and the smell of his after shave lingered around him. She felt dizzy.

They remained silent. Jacqueline could not think of one clever thing to say. Her brain had had a little melt down as a result of his closeness. She swirled the reddish drink in her glass while watching Bella and Will on the other side of the room. They looked very much in love and so happy to be with one another. Jealousy struck Jacqueline and she frowned. She glanced at Hamilton again and saw that he was equally distracted by Will and Bella as she.

-xXx-

Hamilton remained quiet. He found that he couldn't think of anything to say. He had his head filled with questions but none of them came out. He frowned and glanced darkly at Will and Bella who had left him alone with Jacqueline. He sure could use some back up, at least someone else to talk to. Hamilton wondered why she didn't say anything. He realized that he may be the one should start a conversation.

"So…" the both said at the same time. He looked up and met her eyes, both smiling awkwardly.

"You first," he offered.

"No, you first," she said. He lost himself in her eyes.

"So, Will and Bella, huh?" was all that he could find to say.

"Yeah, about time!" Jacqueline glanced at the two they were discussing.

"Really?"

"She has been in love with him since she was like six, but never admitted it until he thought of asking Caroline Busse to marry him."

"I see," Hamilton said. They stood silent for a while. Both deep in thought.

"Do you think I'm a freak or something?" She suddenly asked. He was not prepared for that question. He looked down at his feet, not sure what to say. When he didn't say anything she said: "You do!" He looked up and found her eyes filled with tears. She turned to walk away but he grabbed her hand.

"No, I don't think you are a freak," he said heatedly, drawing her in. "But I am confused, a bit angry and very hurt." She was dangerously close to him. If he tilted his head a bit forward their lips would meet. The taste of her lips, the kiss in London, flashed in his head. He clenched his teeth.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered. "I never meant to… It got out of hand…" She looked sincerely regretful. Hamilton felt for her. "Hamilton, there is something you need to know. But you must promise not to be pissed off at me, ok?"

"There is more?" His blue eyes were wide open with disbelief.

"Your mother knows. She found me out just before the prom." Jacqueline looked at him with a very anxious face. _That's why she sounded so weird when I asked about Jake. But she knew all this time and never said a word._ He suddenly realized he was still holding on to her hand. He let it go quickly. She took a step backwards and looked away, but he caught a glimpse of a tear rolling down her cheek. He had to muster all his self control not to wipe it away.

"You let her know but not me?" he asked unbelievingly. She kept looking away.

"She pulled me aside and asked me. I couldn't very well lie to her face. She is your mother after all. And I needed her help with my diploma." She glanced at him.

"But why didn't you tell me?" he whispered.

"I was going to, but then you had your little speech about loving me against you will." She looked into his eyes with eyes filled with tears and pain. His heart melted, but he had to fight his feelings. He would not forgive and forget that easily.

-xXx-

Jacqueline cursed her tears but they kept coming. She could see that they had a long way to go before he would ever forgive her completely.

"Our friendship was built on a lie! I don't even know you!" he exclaimed.

"When I was with you I was myself," she whispered and lowered her tear filled eyes.

"Apart from the Jake-part, you mean," he smirked sardonically.

"Even the Jake-part," she sighed and he snorted, looking away. "I cannot do this." She turned away from him, started to make her way through the crowd in front of the bar. Silently she prayed for him to follow her and make her stay. But she knew he would not do that. She got to Bella and Will. "I'm leaving."

"No, Jackie," Bella said, taking her hand.

"Yes, I was a fool to think we would ever going to get past the Jake-thing," Jacqueline said and then turned to Will: "Hi Will, nice to see you. By the way, I'm sorry for everything."

"Then you have to come to the reunion! Hamilton will be there, we're all gonna be there. It's gonna be fine!" Bella exclaimed.

"Bella, I'm sorry, but love does not conquer all. Especially not when there's only one with loving feelings." Bella looked at a spot on the left of Jacqueline's head.

"Don't be so sure. He's coming over."

"I'm leaving." Jacqueline left them and started going up the stairs. She was going to walk out of there with her head held high. Not letting Hamilton know how much she was hurting. Or how much she loved him.

-xXx-

Hamilton watched Jacqueline walk up the stairs. He knew he had been a jerk, again. She had tried to make everything alright again. She had apologized and he would not listen. All he could think of was his mother's silence. Too late he realized he had to run after Jacqueline, but by the time he came out of the club she had disappeared. He sighed.

He went back inside to Bella and Will. They were looking anxiously at him. They looked rather disappointed when he did not bring Jacqueline with him.

"You must make her come to the reunion!" he demanded of Bella.

"Don't worry, Ham. She will be there. She bought the perfect dress and I bet she can't keep away," Bella said reassuringly.

"I'll see you later, I'm still coming with you tomorrow," Hamilton said to Will and Bella.

-xXx-

"They are two souls lost without each other. I can't believe they are fighting it so hard!" Bella said and gazed after the retreating Hamilton. "Why can't they just kiss and make up?! Any fool can see that they both have to restrain themselves not to throw their arms around the other!"

"You have read too many Jane Austen-novels," Will said and pecked her on the nose. "But I love that you are so romantic."

"And I love you too!"

"May I buy my lovely wife-to-be a drink?" Will offered her his arm and escorted her to the bar.

-xXx-

"Jackie?" Bella called as she got back from the bar. She heard a muffled 'yes' from her bedroom. "Are you ok?" Bella opened the door and found Jacqueline in her bed with teary eyes and red nose. "Oh, my poor baby," she whispered and crawled into the bed next to her and held her. Jacqueline sobbed. The tears wouldn't stop coming.

"What was I thinking?"

"He went rushing after you, you know, but you had already left," Bella said encouragingly.

"He did?" Jacqueline looked up with new found hope in her eyes.

"He is crazy for you. Anyone could see he was drooling all over you. He demanded that I make sure you came to the reunion."

"Really?" Jacqueline wiped her face with a tissue. "I wonder what his mother will say if I show up."

"If you really worry about it, why don't you contact her?" Bella suggested.

"Oh, I don't know really. As I said, she does not think of me in the best ways, I imagine."

"You will never know if you don't try."

"What do I say? 'Hey, it's Jake, I mean Jackie, you know the cross dressing she-man from Rawley. Guess what? I'm madly in love with your son and he asked to meet me at the reunion. I hope you don't mind?' Really, Bella?" Jacqueline looked at her.

"Why not?"

"Newsflash Bella, when she found out she made it quite clear that she did not approve. She didn't even pretend to understand!"

"What if I had some dirt on her? Something to bargain with?"

"Bella, I'm not going to blackmail my potential mother in law!" Jacqueline looked appalled. "I'll just go and hope for the best. What can they do? Toss me out? If Hamilton wants me there he'll sort it out."

"I can promise you that both Will and I are going to help Ham as much as we can."

**-TBC-**

**Thank you for encouraging me to write! I love reviews!**


	12. You are Always on my Mind

**Love; Lost and Found**

A _Young Americans_- story

By: jakeline

_Summary__: Jake/Jacqueline never told Hamilton her secret. Now they meet again 10 years later. How will Jacqueline tell Hamilton that Jake never really existed and that she was the boy he fell in love with? _

_Disclaimer__: I do not own the characters or the plot form 'Young Americans', but this story is mine. _

**Chapter 12: ****You are Always on my Mind**

Hamilton and Will met Bella outside their hotel the next morning. Hamilton had slept very ill, haunted by the fact that he had treated Jacqueline that bad. Why did he do that when all he wanted to do was to kiss and make up? He didn't even recognize himself. Sure, he was afraid to trust her again, but anyone could see that she was truly remorseful. And she had admitted that she had done wrong. He regretted his stubbornness. He regretted not kissing her. He regretted not telling her that he loved her. He felt totally miserable and did not know what to do about it. _I have to fix this!_

"So, how's Jacqueline?" Hamilton asked quietly. Bella looked at him, puzzled.

"She'll be fine. Don't worry," Bella assured.

"But she's coming to the reunion?" he asked anxiously.

"I think so. But she's a bit worried, though."

"Why?"

"Your mother," Bella said.

"I'll talk to her." _I'll tell her that I finally have found the girl of my dreams. She cannot argue with love. _

-xXx-

Jacqueline had seen Bella off and was now uncertain as to follow them within the week or wait until the reunion weekend. She felt lost without Bella as her rock. She hadn't been totally alone for some time now and found that she had no clue what to do. She longed to get out on the road with her loyal motorcycle that had followed through the years. To feel truly free.

And then there was Hamilton. There was so much she had wanted to say to him, but hadn't. He had been so resentful, unwilling to listen. If he only knew what power he had over her. Of course she saw that she has some affect on him as well, but he was fighting it. He didn't want to give in to her just yet. She kind of understood, but it was so tiresome. Why couldn't they just kiss and make up? She couldn't stop thinking about his lips against hers.

The only thing she had decided on was to visit her mother for a couple of days. She had been the one Jacqueline had run to when she left Hamilton at Rawley, she had been the one that picked up the pieces and comforted her when she cried herself to sleep. Jacqueline was very thankful for that time with her mother. They had become very close, for a while at least. They hadn't spent time together for a long time now and she needed her support before making her debut at Rawley Academy. Monica Pratt was finally back in the States after months of travelling the world with promoting her latest accomplishment on the big screen. Jacqueline actually looked forward to spend some time with her mother.

-xXx-

"Surprise!" Hamilton said and held his hands over his mother's eyes. He had found her in her study at Rawley. The trip from New York had taken its time and they had enjoyed themselves a lot on the way. He couldn't hardly remember the last time he had felt so free and unbound, so happy!

"Hamilton!" she squealed and swung around and hugged him tightly. "I didn't expect you until this weekend!" She looked very pleased to see him.

"Slight change of plan. I hitched a ride with Will and Bella."

"I'm glad! I have missed you so much!"

"Of course you have," he flashed her a smile. "If you had your way I would still be living with you and dad."

"True," she smiled up at him adoringly.

"So what was it that you wanted to tell me before? That you couldn't tell me on the phone?"

"We'll talk over dinner."

Hamilton shrugged. "Sure." He knew what she was going to tell him. Finally, after all these years of silence she would tell him about Jake. Most of his anger towards his mother had eased off and now he wondered how she would tell him, about her reasons to keep quiet.

He wondered what he would have done if she had told him. Tried to find Jake? He wasn't sure. Maybe he had been more forgiving back then. He could have done anything for Jake. He would do anything for Jacqueline, he realized. The thought of losing her now… he didn't even want to think about it. He would not let that happen. He would not lose her again! Her tear filled hazel eyes flickered before his and he sighed. He had been an idiot.

Hamilton could hardly wait to hear what his mother had to say for herself. He wondered what she would say about him meeting Jacqueline. From what he gathered she had treated Jackie with a contempt that was unlike her. He was actually surprised. His mother had always been the considerate one. The one people came to for help with their problems. That was probably why Jackie had confided in her. Of course his mother must have been as surprised and felt as foolish as he had when she found out. Hamilton could put himself in Jackie's shoes, but he would never dress up as a girl to get his father's attention. He acted out in other ways.

-xXx-

"Hey, mom? I'm here!" Jacqueline called as she let herself into her mother's apartment. She heard a distant 'in here' from the other side of the apartment. She wondered why her mother insisted on living in such a spacious place when there was only her living there now. And she was rarely home. There was too much room for just one person. But her mother liked to throw parties and inviting people from around the world and liked the fact that she also could offer them a place to stay while they're were visiting.

She found her mother in her old bedroom, making her bed.

"Hey honey!" Monica Pratt hugged her daughter tightly. "Long time no see!"

"Likewise!"

"So how've you been?" Her mother held her at arm's length and examined her intensely.

"Ok, just fine. Been to London, seen Bella, met Hamilton… " Jacqueline trailed off.

"Hamilton?" Her mother looked like a question mark. Jacqueline's face turned red. "Oh… _Hamilton!_" she said when she realized who Jacqueline was referring to. "The guy from Rawley right?"

"Yep, that's the one," Jacqueline grinned, feeling her cheeks burning.

"And?" her mother urged.

"Yeah, well, now he knows I'm a girl."

"Good. Or is it bad?"

"Well the fact that I have lied to him doesn't really make it any easier."

"I see. So…"

"Now he wants to meet me at the reunion."

"Interesting!" Her mother looked delighted.

"Really?"

"You get to make your life's performance! Now, what are you going to wear?"

"Are you serious?" Jacqueline looked dumbfounded.

"Of course I'm serious! Honey, I know how much you loved him and worried about telling him."

"Yes, well he kinda found out himself," Jacqueline said, and then continued on the dress-subject, "And, there is this one dress," Jacqueline said and thought of the sexy ruby red dress she and Bella had found.

"Really?" Her mother looked surprised.

"Oh, please! I don't always wear jeans and tank tops you know." Jacqueline laughed at her mother's surprised face. "I have even bought new ones."

"I see. Well, that's good then. You have to tell me everything over dinner!"

-xXx-

"Since when do you cook, mom?" Hamilton asked as he joined his mother in the kitchen where he found her stirring in some pots.

"I have a lot of spare time you know, since you left. I took a cooking class," his mother said, shrugging her shoulders. When he was living at home the only thing he was fed was oven heated or micro waved, at special occasions she catered or ordered take out and maybe made a salad.

"I'm impressed." Hamilton laughed and stuck his nose into the pots. "Smells really nice too."

"Oh please, I used to cook some things when you were still living here."

"Mother, I'm sorry but to put something already made in the oven does not count as cooking."

"But I made a mean salad!" His mother laughed.

"I cannot argue with that." He joined in her laugh.

"Can you set the table, please?"

"Sure, is dad coming?"

"No, it's just you and me."

"As usual," Hamilton snorted and opened the cupboard and took out two plates.

"He's pretty busy with the reunion and other things regarding the school you know. Besides, I want you to myself. We have a lot to talk about."

"Stop defending him, mom. He has not change. I don't think he ever will."

"You're right," his mother answered with sadness in her voice. "But let's not talk about that now! I want to hear about you! What you've been up to lately. Have you met anyone?" Hamilton was startled by the question. His cheeks reddened when he thought of Jacqueline in that black dress, so close but yet so far away from him. He was not really prepared to start answering questions about him and Jackie. "So you have met someone," his mother said pointedly.

"Yeah, well…" he averted his eyes. "It's complicated." He shrugged and left the kitchen to set the table in the dining room. He was glad to be away from his mother's queering eyes. She would want to hear everything about this new girl in his life and he didn't know how to answer her questions. He didn't know what his mother would say about his love for Jacqueline. He wondered if he could get away with just calling her Jackie or if she would make the connection with the person formerly known as Jake. He sure hoped not. He had to played this well. He had no idea of what his mother thought of Jacqueline at the moment. But he was rather sure that she was not happy with Jacqueline deceiving everyone. He hoped that she would forgive her as he had.

"Come and help me with the food, Munchie!" his mother called from the kitchen. He gritted his teeth at the sound of 'Munchie' but he kept quiet.

They sat down and begun eating in silence, enjoying the meal and the chilled white wine. Neither of them knew where to begin.

"So tell me about this girl. How did you meet?" his mother finally asked.

"We met in London, but she lives in New York," Hamilton said evasively, he knew his mother would not settle for that. He braced himself for the storm of questions that he knew was coming.

"How old is she? What does she do? Is she pretty? Oh silly question, of course she's pretty! When do I get to meet her?"

"Mom! One question at the time!" He put in a mouthful of the chicken stew. "This is great, by the way," he mumbled as he chewed.

"Oh no! You don't get off that easily, young man! Tell me everything about her!"

"It's all very new, mom. She's the same age as me," he said. "But was what it you wanted to tell me that you couldn't say over the phone? I'm dying to know!" He tried to sound interested and curious although he knew what was about to come.

"We can talk about that some other time."

"No, we will talk about it now!" Hamilton urged and stared at her. She averted her eyes, not wanting to meet his queering eyes. "What is it?"

His mother sighed. "I should have told you this ages ago, but I promised not to." _Here it comes. _

"Go on."

"I shouldn't be the one to tell you, really, but…" she hesitated.

"What, mom!" he urged, she took a sip of her wine.

"Jake's a girl," she blurted. He was surprised that she just said it like that. So simply.

"I know," he replied. Her eyes widened. _Now why did I have to say that?_

"You know?!" She looked chocked.

"Yes, Jackie's the girl I met in London. The one I love." His mother's face turned red.

"And you just forgive her? You're not angry?"

"I was at first, but then I realized, well actually just a few days ago I realized that I love her. I have always loved her."

-xXx-

Kate Fleming felt utterly bewildered. Her son loved that little scheming fraud. She couldn't believe how that happened.

"Although she deceived you and everyone else for years?" She couldn't believe it. "She lied to you Hamilton!" Kate nearly yelled.

"Well, you should talk!" he answered meaningly. "You knew for all these years and you didn't tell me! We could've been married by now!" The word married made her shrug. She didn't want to lose him to Jacqueline. She didn't trust her one bit.

"How did you find out?" she asked, trying to be calm. She could see on his resolute face and gritted teeth that this was one battle she was not going to win easily.

"She was one of the models in London. She looks quite the same besides she had longer hair now. It wasn't that hard to see really." Hamilton took a sip of his wine and leaned back in his chair.

"She cannot be trusted! She will lie to you again!" She felt frustrated with him for not seeing Jacqueline for what she really was.

"That may be so, but that is a risk I am willing to take. She is sorry for what she did."

"Have you talked to her?"

"Only a little. I was too stubborn to let her explain." Hamilton sighed and looked at her with eyes that were filled with sadness. "Mom, this has nothing to do with you. It is my life."

"It has everything to do with me! I am the one who will be here to catch you when she leaves you," Kate said.

"She won't do that! I cannot believe you! God! You have always been so understanding!" He stared at her with cold piercing eyes. "I'm gonna marry Jackie and there's nothing you can do about it! Stop treating me like I'm fifteen! I'm old enough to make my own mistakes!" With that he stormed out, leaving her alone at the dinner table. She must admit that she did admire him. He was ready to fight for the one he loved, even if that meant going against the wishes of his mother. Maybe she could learn to like Jacqueline after all. She had certainly made an impression on her son.

**-TBC-**


	13. I’ve Been Thinking about You

**Love; Lost and Found**

A _Young Americans_- story

By: jakeline

_Summary__: Jake/Jacqueline never told Hamilton her secret. Now they meet again 10 years later. How will Jacqueline tell Hamilton that Jake never really existed and that she was the boy he fell in love with? _

_Disclaimer__: I do not own the characters or the plot form 'Young Americans', but this story is mine._

**Chapter 13****: I've Been Thinking about You**

"So tell me. How did he find out?" Monica Pratt asked as they were finishing their meal. Jacqueline took as sip of wine and sighed. She hardly knew what to say.

"Well, as it turns out, Hamilton is a renowned photographer. And he happened to be the one shooting the London-job. I didn't know of course, and was truly chocked to see him there. He didn't recognise me until he was selecting pictures to send to my mail. And, boy, was he angry and feeling betrayed. I heard everything from Bella who had direct contact with Will who was staying with Ham. We bumped into each other in New York, litterary," Jacqueline paused and took another sip of wine.

"Go on," her mother urged.

"And he is gorgeous as ever. But he wouldn't talk to me! Bella tried her best to set us up, she even said yes to the reunion in my name. The last night before Bella and Will went back to New Rawley we all met at this club and he made it quite clear that I was not forgiven and that he needed more time. He got really upset when I said his mother knew."

"No wonder."

"I know I behaved badly, but it was ten years ago! One would think that he could forgive me."

"I'm sure everything will work out at the reunion."

"I don't know. How will I face the rest of my former classmates?"

"I'm sure you'll manage."

"I'm not so sure mom."

"You will have friends to support you, right? Bella and Will? And Hamilton, since he wants to meet you at the reunion."

Jacqueline sighed. "You're right. But I have never been this nervous in my life!"

-xXx-

Hamilton walked the grounds at Rawley feeling frustrated and angry. He couldn't believe that his mother was so unforgiving. He would have thought that she would put his happiness first. Of course he had been devastated when Jake had left ten years ago and his mother had been the one to comfort him. If only she had told him. He felt like she had robbed him of ten years of happiness. He sort of blamed himself for not trying to find Jake again. But what was done was done. There was nothing he could do about that now. He had been an idiot for not listening to Jacqueline at Joe's. If she knew what impact she had on his life…

Hamilton sighed. He found himself by the docks. The campus was quite at this hour and he was alone by the lake. He sat down and gazed out over the water. The sun was setting and the sky was painted with pink and purple. He wished Jacqueline was there with him to share that moment. He actually missed her even though they hadn't spent more than half an hour together the last ten years. Maybe he should call Bella and ask for Jacqueline's number. Just to hear her voice. Nah, he needed a plan. And a good one. He had to win Jacqueline's heart again. Now that she was finally back in his life he was not prepared to let her disappear on him again.

-xXx-

"This is the man I can see myself grow old with," Jacqueline said. She recalled the feeling of his arms around her. She had felt completely safe.

"Then you'll have to fight for him! Show him that you are the one for him!" her mother said.

"Mom, this is not one of your many romantic movies," Jacqueline said and glared at her. Her mother had turned out to be quite the romantic. Jacqueline was not so romantic, but she liked the thought of being courted, the thought of being special to someone, to be someone's wife.

"I know, honey, but sometimes people need to be swept away."

"Is that what daddy did to capture you?" Jacqueline asked quietly. They hadn't talked about him for a while.

"Yes, in a way. He was very persuasive in his courting." Her mother smiled.

"So, how did you meet?"

"I believe he saw me on stage one day and decided to wait for me afterwards. When I came out after the show he was just standing there with the biggest bouquet of roses I have ever seen."

"You loved him very much."

"I did, but not at first. He waited for me every night for weeks before I even considered going out with him. But then he finally wore my defense down and he took me to the sweetest little restaurant you can imagine and we sat and talked until the owner almost threw us out!" Her mother giggled like a schoolgirl at the memory.

"How did he die?" Jacqueline asked cautiously. She could see the tears forming in her mother's eyes. She reached over the table and took her mother's hand and squeezed it.

"It was the stupidest thing!" The tears started rolling down her mother's cheeks. "He was hurrying to see me perform. It was opening night and I had begged him to come even though he didn't really have the time. He usually came to my opening nights. He didn't see the truck pulling out in front of him because he was rushing to see me…" her voice cracked. "It was my fault…"

"Mommy, of course it was not your fault!" Jacqueline said. "He wanted to see you, the woman he loved."

"But he could have come another night," her mother sobbed. Jacqueline rose and walked over to hug and comfort her mother. Her mother had always been the rock and never shown herself as vulnerable. Being a single mom and actress was not the easiest life in the world. To be widowed that early in life was never easy.

"I love you, mom," Jacqueline whispered.

"I love you too, honey. I know I haven't been the best mother to you."

"I don't care. I'm glad I still have you and Consuela."

"Well, you did some pretty stupid things to get my attentions when you were younger." Her mother smiled through her tears.

"Yeah, well, I grew out of it didn't I?" Jacqueline laughed. She had been totally messed up before going to Rawley. Thanks to Hamilton she had stayed through out high school at the same place. "Oh God! How will I get through the reunion?"

-xXx-

The following day Hamilton decided to go see Will and Bella, who was staying at Bella's. Will and his father had reconciled, but Will wanted to stay with Bella as often as he could. Hamilton wanted to hear their thoughts of the plan he had formed during the night. He knew they would help him. He was madly in love with Jacqueline. His heart and body was filled with uncontrollable joy. Now he only had to hope that she would have him despite his behavior these last weeks. He had found love, a love he had thought he'd lost ten years ago.

He ate a quick breakfast, his mother was long gone to teach, and took his old bike and went over to the gas station.

"Hey Bella! Is Will up yet?" Hamilton shouted as he saw Bella sitting on a stool outside the station.

"Yeah, he's sitting at the table writing," she called back with a bright smile. "You're looking quite pleased with yourself."

"I am! I have a plan!" Hamilton said as he hopped off his bike and put it next to Bella's stool.

"Do tell!" Bella looked intrigued. "I suppose it has to do with the reunion and Jackie? Talked to your mother yet?"

"Yup, had a big argument about Jackie at dinner yesterday. I stormed out. She was totally out of line. When I woke up this morning she was already gone."

"Ok, I take it she was not too happy to hear that her son was totally and utterly in love with Jacqueline, also known as Jake."

"That is correct. But I have a plan. Eventually she will come around to my way of looking at things anyway. I am her only child. I've got some power."

"So what's the plan?"

"Let's go inside, I am dying for a cup of coffee! And I'm gonna need Will's help as well." Bella led him into their kitchen where Will sat in front of his laptop typing away. Will was so concentrated at his work that he didn't even realize he had company until Bella placed a kiss on his cheek.

"Hey, babe, look who I found! And with a plan!" Will looked up.

"Let's hear it," Will said. Bella poured Hamilton and herself some coffee and they sat down at the table.

"Ok, so I have been an idiot," began Hamilton, bracing himself for Bella's mockery.

"Yes you have. But if you are willing to change, I am willing to let it slide," Bella said, giggling.

"That is very generous of you," Hamilton scolded. "Well, here's what I've planned…"

-xXx-

Jacqueline stayed with her mother a couple of days before her mother had to leave the country to go abroad again. It was still a week before the reunion and not feeling to tempted to go back to her own place she phoned Bella.

"Hey, gorgeous," Bella answered.

"Hi, Bella."

"What's up?"

"Nothing much, you?"

"Nothing here either. Same old same old," Bella giggled. Jacqueline could hear there was something her friend hid from her.

"So I was thinking. I have basically finished the founding of my company and I am so bored of the city."

"And?"

"Mom's left again. I have been with her these last couple of days and now I cannot wait till next weekend. God! I just want the reunion over with!" Jacqueline exclaimed, frustrated. "I miss you. And I miss Ham."

"I'm pretty sure Ham misses you too. He had a big fight with his mom about you, you know."

"Really?" Jacqueline smiled to herself. "I can still come to the reunion, right? I mean she hasn't banned me or something?"

"No, that's all good, at least as far as I know," Bella giggled.

"Ok, spill it, Bella. You know you can't keep things from me!"

"No, I'm not going to say a thing. You will have to find out at the reunion."

"Gah! This waiting is torture. Do you think he has forgiven me?"

"Yes, I can safely say that he is not angry with you anymore." Jacqueline's face lit up with a huge grin. There might be a chance for them after all. Her heart started racing in her chest. The thought of being close to Hamilton again…

"I was thinking of hopping onto my bike and cruise the country up to New Rawley. See some sights and so. I should be arriving on like Wednesday or something. Do you have a bed to spare?"

"Always room for you here, Jackie," Bella said.

"I can't wait! I'm psyched!"

"You should be!" Bella said before hanging up. Jacqueline giggled to herself and started packing her trunk. Her hands slid over the ruby red dress she was going to wear at the reunion. She hoped Hamilton would like it. She had some plans of her own…

**-TBC-**

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	14. Back to the Scene of the Crime

**Love; Lost and Found**

A _Young Americans_- story

By: jakeline

_Summary__: Jake/Jacqueline never told Hamilton her secret. Now they meet again 10 years later. How will Jacqueline tell Hamilton that Jake never really existed and that she was the boy he fell in love with? _

_Disclaimer__: I do not own the characters or the plot form 'Young Americans', but this story is mine. _

**Chapter 1****4: Back to the Scene of the Crime**

Hamilton tried to keep himself busy for the following week. He found some things to do around the house, painting and stuff, basically things to keep out of his mother's face. Bella had told him that Jacqueline was driving across the country on her bike and that she should arrive just in time for the reunion. He realized he would eventually have to speak with his mother. They hadn't spoken since that first night when they argued over Jacqueline. His father didn't notice the tension between his wife and his son, simply because he was rarely home. Hamilton had to reconcile with her, however, for his plan to work.

Hamilton was quite sure she would see his side of it and find it in her heart to forgive Jacqueline as he had. He needed her to help him convince his father. He just didn't know how to persuade his mother to give Jacqueline another chance. He knew that they would get a long perfectly. Of course he realized she was only looking out for him, but it was getting tiresome since he was nearing his thirties. He didn't want to have to choose between his love and his family. How he wished Jacqueline was here. He was driving himself insane with replaying the kiss in London his head. The feeling of her soft lips brushing gently against his, her scent, her smile, her… Hamilton sighed.

-xXx-

Jacqueline had no rush to get to New Rawley, being on the road brought a feeling of complete freedom. She loved it. During her years as a model she had made friends all over the country and a bed was only a phone call away. But as she came nearer her final destination, she felt more and more nervous about the reunion. What would Mr and Mrs Fleming say? Had Hamilton made peace with his mother or not? She wished she could just call him and ask, but she still had no number for him, and emailing seemed so… Impersonal.

Funnily enough she missed him. They had barely had a full conversation since London, but she couldn't help herself. He was _the one_. He had always been the man she had seen herself marrying. She had lost him once and had no intentions of letting him go this time. His radiant blue eyes flickered in her head and she sighed. _Hamilton, I am yours! I will never let you go again!_ Bella's romantic notions had rubbed off on her. She felt like one of those romantic heroines Bella was always on about. Jacqueline smiled to herself. Perhaps her mother was right. People do need to be swept away sometimes.

-xXx-

Kate Fleming had once again turned to Finn for guidance. Hamilton had not spoken to her since that night when he stormed out from dinner. She didn't even try to talk to him. He was stubborn when he wanted to. She had never seen him this passionate about a woman before and it surprised her. She was not ready to lose him, but she realized there was nothing she could do but to reconcile with Jacqueline. For her son's sake she would be willing to do almost anything.

"Finn, Hamilton is going to propose to Jake. I mean Jacqueline," she said as he brought her a cup of coffee from the cafeteria.

"Is he now?"

"Yes, he told me the night he came here. I knew he had met someone. I told him about Jacqueline's charade in high school and he said he had already found out."

"I see," Finn said.

"I got really upset, because he has forgiven her completely! No questions asked!" Kate was still surprised.

"Love does that to a man, or a woman," Finn said pointedly. Kate realized he was thinking of her marriage to Steven. The things she had put up with over the years… She wouldn't even go as far as calling it a marriage anymore. He was rarely home, and they had had separate bedrooms for years. Perhaps Hamilton's passion would rub off on her so that she would have the courage to put and end to the charade.

"I guess. And I was so hard on him for that, I said things I shouldn't have and he stormed out with 'I'm gonna marry Jackie and there is nothing you can do about it!' He also accused me of treating him like a child."

"Well, you can be very over protecting. That is not necessarily a bad thing. But in this case I have to go with Hamilton. You cannot keep him from following his heart. If he loves her…" Finn looked straight into her eyes and came closer. His blue eyes were filled with desire and her heart started racing. This was not the time.

"Finn, I…" She started but was interrupted by her son.

"Mom, we need to talk," Hamilton said as he entered her art room. He looked surprised to find Finn there as well. "Finn." Finn nodded a greeting. Finn took a step back. She realized how it would look to her son. She felt all flushed. _I am a grown woman for heaven's sake!_ Finn still made her heart skip a beat. But she had to be sensible now.

"Yes, we do," she acknowledged. "I have talked this over with Finn. And he seems to think that I should let you make your own mistakes. I'm sorry that I have been so…"

"Uncaring? Unreasonable? Unsympathetic? Bitchy?" Hamilton suggested.

"I was going to say 'over protecting', but your words are better I guess." She smiled.

"I get that you care for me, but seriously, I'm an adult you know."

"I know honey, but I'm still not sure that Jacqueline has changed."

"Mom, it was 10 years ago, you have to let it go," Hamilton said.

"Yeah, Kate, she didn't know what else to do. I think she panicked," Finn said. "Jake never seemed to be the lying type. He was, I mean,_she_ was a good student."

"And she is really sorry about what she did," Hamilton said. Kate found that she was convinced that Jacqueline had changed and that she was ready to make it all right.

"Ok, Hamilton, so what do you propose we do?" Kate finally asked. Hamilton's face lit up in a broad grin and he hugged her.

"I knew I could count on you, mom!" And then he told her about his plan to make everything right.

-xXx-

Jacqueline finally arrived at New Rawley rather late on Wednesday evening. She had called Bella from Carson to let her know when she could expect her. It felt strange coming back to the sleepy town she had left in haste ten years ago. When she thought of facing her class mates again her stomach tensed up in a tight knot. Although she could count on Bella and Will, and hopefully even Hamilton, she was nervous as hell.

"Hey, Jackie!" Bella called as she pulled in at the gas station and got off her bike. "Oh my God! Is that old thing still running?" Jacqueline took off her helmet, surprised to not be alone. She hadn't seen Bella sitting in the shadows.

"Hi, Bella!" They hugged. "Yep there is still some life in this old thing. God! I've missed you!"

"Me too, it's quite boring here you know." Bella laughed.

"You've had Will."

"Yes, but he's been busy writing all the time," Bella said and pouted.

"What is he working on now?"

"Something new. He's very secretive about it!" Bella frowned and looked far from pleased.

"Well, now I'm here!" Jacqueline smiled and put an arm around her friend's shoulders.

"Yes, I need some drama in my life!"

"What do you mean?" Jacqueline's eyes narrowed when eying her friend. "What are you up to now?"

"_I_ am not up to anything!" Bella defended herself. Jacqueline sighed. She knew better than to press Bella for more information. When Bella herself was up to something she could barely shut up, but when she was sworn to secrecy by another she was like a Swiss vault.

"Fine."

"You hungry?" Bella asked.

"Starving!"

"The diner's still open," Bella said and nodded towards Friendly's across the street.

"Yeah, I could kill for one of their burgers!"

"Ok, let's get your bag inside then." Jacqueline was to sleep in Bella's little sister's old room.

At the diner Will and Scout sat and enjoyed a sundae. To Jacqueline's disappointment Hamilton was nowhere in sight. _Maybe it's for the best. I want to make an impression at the reunion. First impressions are vital. _

"Does Scout know?" Jacqueline asked quietly before they reached their table.

"Yeah, Will told him. He's fine, chocked, but fine," Bella whispered back.

"Oh, good."

"It'll be fine," Bella reassured her. Jacqueline felt very awkward meeting Scout, but to her surprise he greeted her with a wide grin.

"I always knew there was something odd about you." They shook hands and Jacqueline ordered a burger and joined them at the table.

"God, I have actually missed this place!" Jacqueline said.

"So, what do we call you now?" Scout asked.

"You can call me Jackie," she smiled.

"Is Hamilton coming?" Jacqueline asked hopefully. The other three looked at each other, not sure what to say.

"No, he's helping out to set up for the reunion," Bella finally answered.

"Of course," Jacqueline said. The bell rang as the door opened, the four friends glanced towards the door, half expecting to see Hamilton walk in, but it was Ryder, the obnoxious Brit who had made the years at Rawley a living hell. "I thought he had died of cancer by now," Jacqueline snorted quietly. Inside she was a mess. Ryder had made fun of her and Hamilton all the time. He was the one who started the gay-rumor. In his trail came a blond girl with a very skimpy dress.

"So this dump's still here then," Ryder remarked. "And so are the locals," he continued as he spotted the quartet in the corner. "But without our lovebirds Ham and Jake I see." Jacqueline felt her face go completely red. But she kept looking straight at Ryder who didn't seem to recognize her. "Hello, I'm Ryder Forrest." He held out his hand towards Jacqueline. "I do not believe we've met," he said flirtatiously. Jacqueline's eyes narrowed.

"Jackie Pratt," she said with a broad smile. She let the name sink in, but Ryder still didn't seem to get it. If he had seen her pictures he didn't let it show.

"Lovely to meet you, did you go to Rawley girls?" He was the same, didn't seem to have changed one bit.

"No…" She was cut off by the blond in the skimpy dress.

"Aren't you gonna introduce me, honey?" she said with an accusing tone.

"Oh, sorry, love. Everybody, this is my wife, Amber." All around the table turned to look at the young blond girl who was hanging on Ryder's arm. Everyone was surprised to hear that he was married. He didn't seem the marrying type. Well, he didn't seem the faithful type anyway. Jacqueline felt sorry for the poor girl who was obviously in love with the asshole Ryder. To be married to a man who even flirts with others when you are present. Couldn't be easy.

"Nice to meet you all. Always pleasant to meet friends of my hubbie," she said and shot an adoring smile towards Ryder, who clenched his teeth. They mumbled their names and 'nice to meet you'.

"So where are the two love birds?" Ryder asked with a smirk. Nobody answered him. The doorbell rang again and in came Hamilton. "Talk of the devil. Here's one of them now!" Ryder said and Jacqueline's heart stopped. She looked over at Hamilton and fought the urge to run over and throw herself into his arms. He walked casually over to them, shot Ryder a glance. "Where's your side kick, bat girl?" She could see that Hamilton clenched his teeth, but he remained silent. He sat down next to her.

"So you're still alive, cancer boy?" Hamilton said coolly. "And not any wiser I see." Ryder's smile froze at the remark. He seemed to realize that he could not push them around as he used to ten years ago.

"Whatever," he snorted and escorted his wife out of the diner.

"I thought you were busy with the reunion?" Bella said.

"Yes, well I got hungry. Are they still serving food? Or is the kitchen closed?" Hamilton answered with a crooked smile that made Jacqueline completely and utterly fall for him once again. He was too adorable. She had to avert her eyes so he didn't see the flame of desire that was burning in them.

"I think I can convince them to make another burger," Will said and rose to talk to the man behind the counter.

"So…" Bella said and glanced meaningly at Scout.

"Yeah," Scout said.

"What?" Hamilton looked at them.

"I'm gonna go home and sort Jackie's room out. I totally forgot to put sheets in the bed." Jacqueline glared at her friend, not really wanting to be left alone with Hamilton.

"Yeah, I come help," Scout said. They were so obviously leaving them alone.

"Will! We're going to the garage. I need your help," Bella called to her boyfriend.

"I'll be right there," Will said and left the counter, waved to Hamilton and Jackie. "Your food should be finished soon. See ya, when I see ya!" And then he was gone and they were left alone.

-xXx-

Hamilton could not help himself, he just had to see her. Bella had mentioned that they'd probably get something at Friendly's. And soon enough, after helping his mother with the decorations, he found that he was standing outside Friendly's looking in at her. Bella, Will, Scout and Jacqueline were sitting at a table talking to a blond man with a girl hanging on his arm. He soon realized it was one of the biggest jerks that ever went to Rawley. _Ryder_. He could see Jacqueline's face turn red as she shook his hand. Ryder had made the life at Rawley very hard for them, mocking them, calling them gay and so on. That did it. He had to go in there.

"Talk of the devil. Here's one of them now!" he heard Ryder say as he entered the diner. "Where's your side kick, bat girl?" Hamilton clenched his teeth but kept silent. He walked and seated himself next to Jacqueline.

"So you're still alive, cancer boy?" Hamilton said with an ice cool tone in his voice. "And not any wiser I see." He could see Ryder freeze. Hamilton realized that Ryder had not recognized Jacqueline as Jake. Which probably was a good thing.

"Whatever," he snorted and escorted the blond girl, who Hamilton realized must be his wife. _Poor girl_.

"I thought you were busy with the reunion?" Bella said.

"Yes, well I got hungry. Are they still serving food? Or is the kitchen closed?" Hamilton smiled.

"I think I can convince them to make another burger," Will said and rose to talk to the man behind the counter.

"So…" Bella said.

"Yeah," Scout said.

"What?" Hamilton wondered what they were up to now, nothing good he suspected.

"I'm gonna go home and sort Jackie's room out. I totally forgot to put sheets in the bed." He could see Jacqueline's glare at her friend. He smiled a little.

"Yeah, I come help," Scout said. Hamilton realized that they were going to leave them there alone.

"Will! We're going to the garage. I need your help," Bella called to her boyfriend.

"I'll be right there," Will said and left the counter, waved to Hamilton and Jackie. "Your food should be finished soon. See ya, when I see ya!" And then he was gone and they were left alone. Hamilton found it hard to speak to her. Everything he could think of sounded ridiculous. Now that he had realized he was in love with her he didn't know how to act around her. He didn't know what she thought of him now. He glanced over at her, she was looking away. Just sitting there next to her made his heart pound uncontrollably and his blood was boiling. She was wearing a pair of tight blue jeans and a white tank top underneath a black cardigan. Her hair was pulled back with hair pins and fell in wild curls down to her shoulders.

Their food came and they started eating in silence. He really was starving.

"Could you pass the ketchup, please?" he mumbled between the bites. She handed him the bottle and their fingers met. The touch made a jolt of electricity spark through his body. She must have felt it too because she looked up, right into his eyes. They were still holding the bottle of ketchup.

"So…" Jacqueline let go of the bottle and broke the gaze. He didn't know what to do. He splashed some ketchup on his fries.

"Yeah." Hamilton felt his face go red. He felt hot. _How could I have been so blind?_ He wanted to just hold her and tell her that he never wanted to let her go again.

"So, how've you been?"

"Good, just good. And you?"

"Oh, fine. Just fine." A awkward silence followed. They busied themselves with their food. He glanced at her from time to time, but she kept looking down.

-xXx-

Jacqueline didn't know what to say. He was as gorgeous as ever, looking really awkward and unsure about himself. _God, why did they have to leave us here alone?_ She finished her burger and fries. Her fingers were still tingling after the touch of his. She didn't know where to look. He shifted in his seat and suddenly their thighs came in contact. She drew a deep breath. This was torture. To be so close to him and not being able to do anything made her yearn for his touch. She knew she had to let him take the first step. She took a large sip of her coke to cool her senses down.

"I should be getting back," he said.

"Yeah, me too," she glanced at him. He was wiping his hands on a napkin. She finished her drink and stood up. She found herself looking up into his piercing blue eyes. Her lips quivered. She could feel his breath on her face. He was dangerously close.

"So…" He smiled crookedly. She found herself leaning towards him. She tilted her head upwards. His mouth was very close. She had to kiss him. Her head was spinning. His face came closer and suddenly their lips met, carefully at first. Then ten years of buried emotions was put into that kiss. Her hands found his face and she entangled her fingers in his hair. His arms drew her closer and her body was pressed against his. He had one hand on the small of her back and the other caressed her jaw line. She couldn't get enough. A small cough behind them brought them back to reality and they realized that they were not alone. They glanced shyly at each other. Both were a bit embarrassed about the passion that was put into that kiss. They looked even more embarrassed when they looked at the waiter.

"Eh, we're closing now," he said.

"Yeah, we'll get out of here," Hamilton said. He took her hand and they left the diner, both blushing like teenagers.

**-TBC-**

_Reviews make my day…_


	15. The Maddest Kind of Love

**Love; Lost and Found**

A _Young Americans_- story

By: jakeline

_Summary__: Jake/Jacqueline never told Hamilton her secret. Now they meet again 10 years later. How will Jacqueline tell Hamilton that Jake never really existed and that she was the boy he fell in love with? _

_Disclaimer__: I do not own the characters or the plot form 'Young Americans', but this story is mine. _

**Chapter ****15: The Maddest Kind of Love**

His heart sang with joy. She most certainly felt the same. The way she had kissed him and with such passion. He had never felt anything like it. Ten years he had waited for that kiss. He had gotten a taste of it in London, but this was something else. The surroundings had disappeared. He had let go of her reluctantly when the waiter had brought them back to reality. He could hardly believe she was there with him right now, holding his hand. They left the diner and wandered aimlessly through New Rawley in silence, both afraid to break the enchantment. She put her head on his shoulder.

"God, I've missed you," she whispered.

"Yeah, me too," he whispered back and squeezed her hand. "I cannot believe I was so blind!"

"I am so sorry for everything, Hamilton."

"I shouldn't have let you go so easily."

She giggled softly, "I didn't leave you much choice."

"I should have tried harder. I regretted almost everything I said that night."

"I regret not telling you," she said and stopped. She turned and faced him. "I was so afraid of what you would think of me. Afraid of telling everyone I had lied to them for three years." She looked down. He took her face in his hands and tilted it up so that their eyes met.

"It will be alright, Jackie," he said and kissed her again. She put her arms around his neck.

"I'm seriously dreading the reunion. I mean, what will people say? Do I tell them or what? Ryder didn't recognize me at all. Not even from magazines."

"We will do what we must. We'll get through it together. Bella, Will and Scout will also be there. You don't have to worry about anything."

"Promise?"

"I promise!"

"Okay," she said. "I trust you."

"I will never let you disappear on me again!" he exclaimed and threw his arms around her and hugged her tightly.

-xXx-

Jacqueline's heart raced in her chest. _He loves me!_ She felt deliriously happy. She broke free from his embrace and gazed into his beautiful blue eyes that were filled with love.

"I have loved you since the day I met you," she whispered truthfully. "Never stopped. I am yours!" A smile grew wide in his face and he looked relieved.

"Me too. I mean, I love you too. I meant what I said at prom night. I loved you then and I love you now."

"So I am forgiven then?" she asked.

"Yes, you are." He smiled at her, his eyes glittering in the moonlight.

"So, what now then?"

"Well, we need to see my mom before the reunion. I kind of promised that I will bring you to dinner tomorrow night. If that is okay with you, of course." Jacqueline frowned. To meet his mother was not something she looked forward to. He noticed her frown. "I have talked to her. It will be fine. She wants a second chance to get to know you better. And she is in charge of the welcoming committee. You know, the name tags and so on. We kind of need her."

"Okay, I will have dinner with you and your mother. Will your father be there?"

"I doubt it," Hamilton snorted.

"He hasn't changed?" She looked up at him.

"No." Hamilton looked away.

"I'm so sorry." Jacqueline caressed his cheek.

"It's okay. I gave up on him a long time ago." He started walking again.

"My mom and I finally found our way back to each other."

"I'm glad." He smiled. "What did she say when she found out about your adventures as Jake?"

"Well, she realized of course that she didn't know me at all. The fact that she hadn't visited me at all at Rawley kinda took her by surprise. And she still thinks I'm pretty strange." Jacqueline giggled. "But we get along fine now."

"Good for you." He put an arm around her shoulders and kissed her on the cheek. "Oh, by the way, maybe it is time we exchanged numbers now?"

"Yeah! Of course!" She picked up her phone from her pocket and held it up to his face and took a picture. "Oh so cute!" she said as she inspected the result. "Your number, handsome." Hamilton said his number and she saved it on her phone before calling his cell up. "That's me," she said as his phone started ringing.

"Yeah, I figured." He smiled. "Great, now I won't lose you again!" He saved her number.

"You can try!"

"I cannot believe you're here with me." He hugged her again, holding her so tight she nearly lost her breath. "I will never let you go again." She kissed his neck and breathed in his scent.

"I'm not going anywhere, Munchie." He groaned slightly as she called him 'Munchie', but she silenced his objections with a deep kiss.

-xXx-

At Bella's the rest of the gang was peering out the windows.

"Oh, they are so cute!" Bella squealed as she saw Jacqueline and Hamilton walking towards the garage with their arms around each other. She couldn't believe how good this had turned out. This had not been part of the original plan, but this was better. Hamilton had come to Jackie's rescue. A knight in shining armor. Not that Jackie really needed rescuing, but Ryder was an ass.

"I'm still in chock," Scout said. "It takes some time to get used to the thought of Jake as a girl."

"Tell me about it," Will said. "But it kind of makes sense."

"Oh, please. You both think she's hot," Bella giggled. "I've seen the way you two drooled over her pictures in the magazines."

"But that was before we knew," Scout defended himself.

"She is the same you know. I really hope you get over it, because Jackie is not going anywhere soon."

"We know, Bella," Will said. "Don't worry! Hamilton and Jackie belong together. I have seen the way they look at each other. They are madly in love with each other. We will help them in any way we can."

"Good, hopefully they won't need our help, but you never know," Bella said. "Hamilton seems to think everything will be alright."

"Do you really think Hamilton can pull this off?" Scout asked.

"If he has his mother on his side, everything's possible," Bella answered. As Hamilton and Jacqueline came closer she quickly stepped away from the window. "Here they come." Will and Scout followed her example and moved away from the window. Bella tried to peek down to see what they were doing, but she couldn't see them anymore.

-xXx-

"Don't look now, but we have an audience," Hamilton whispered as they came back to the gas station. Jacqueline giggled as she saw the dark shadows behind the curtains in Bella's room.

"Yeah, Bella is a bit curious I suppose," she answered. He spotted her bike.

"Oh, my God! Is that still running?" Hamilton asked surprised.

"Why is everybody so surprised?" Jacqueline asked. "I have taken really good care of it."

"That is so cute!" Hamilton kissed her again. "I love that you still have it."

"If you are really, really nice, I might let you take it for a ride sometime."

"I'd love to! Or I can use the bitch pad as I used to back in the day." He smiled crookedly. Jacqueline recalled how she had loved taking Hamilton for a ride, the feeling of his strong body pressed against her, his arms around her waist. She had loved those rides; especially because they allowed her to be embraced by him without people shooting them awkward glances or came with remarks about them being gay. Now she could hug him as much as she wanted to. Jacqueline was once again filled with almost overwhelming joy. She could almost not believe he was here with her now. Loving her, hugging her, kissing her… It was almost too much.

-xXx-

Hamilton was also reliving the countless times they had gone off on that motorcycle. As they had accelerated down the road he had grabbed her waist and held on for dear life. The sensation the closeness had sent through his body had been torture back then. He still couldn't believe he had been so blind. How had she hidden this gorgeous female body? Of course he had wondered why Jake always wore several layers of clothes, but he had not suspected it was to hide a pair of female breasts.

He took in the beauty that stood before him. The dark curls that danced around her shoulders when she moved, the hazel eyes, generous mouth, slender body and long legs. This was the woman he was going to marry. Tomorrow he was taking a trip to Carson with the guys to pick out a ring for her. He had it all figured out now. The reunion was going to be the day he asked Jacqueline Pratt to marry him. Funnily enough it was the same date as when she had left him ten years ago. He realized this was moving a bit fast, but he couldn't risk loosing her again. And she had said she loved him, and had done so since the day she met him. So had he. _What have I got to lose?_

"I think it is time to say good night," he said reluctantly after a glance at his watch.

"Yeah," she answered. "There is a day tomorrow. And I must prepare myself to meet your mother."

"She won't bite," he laughed. "I'll call you tomorrow then, okay?"

"Yeah, sure."

"I have some errands to run, but I'll be back in to pick you up for dinner."

"Great!" She kissed him once more. He really didn't feel like leaving her there, but he had no choice. It was getting really late and his mother probably wondered where he had gone off to, not that he really cared, but he hadn't said anything when he left.

"So…"

"I could take you, you know," she said suddenly, motioning for her bike.

"Only if you let me drive," he smiled crookedly and looked hopefully at her.

"Yeah, why not?" She smiled, she could never say no to that smile of his. It melted her brain.

"Hop on, baby!" he smiled as he mounted the bike. She giggled and did as he said. He had only driven it once or twice back in high school. She wrapped her arms around his waist and held on tight as he accelerated up the road towards the grounds of Rawley Academy and his parent's house.

-xXx-

Jacqueline rested her head against his back and enjoyed the ride. She had only suggested taking him because she didn't want the night to end. When she had checked her phone she had noticed that it was well past midnight and she was exhausted after being on the road for days. She really needed her beauty sleep if she was to meet his mother the next day. She had to look her best. She had felt so sorry for him when he told her that his father had not changed. But she was glad his mother was finally coming to her senses.

They got to their destination all too soon for Jacqueline's liking. She let go of Hamilton's waist most reluctantly and stepped off the bike.

"This hasn't changed one bit," she said and looked around at the house. She remembered the countless of times they had sat on the porch discussing all small and large matters and gazing at the stars above.

"Look," Hamilton said and pointed to the sky. "It's a full moon." He placed himself behind her and put his cheek on her shoulder.

"Yeah, look at that." She leaned back into his arms. It was a beautiful night, the stars shone bright and Jacqueline couldn't help herself from thinking that there was someone up there watching over her.

"Beautiful," he mumbled against her hair.

"Very," she answered and turned to him. "I still can't believe that I am here, with you."

"You better start believing it, because I'm not letting you out of my sight again!"

"Well, we'll have to see about that. I really have to get some sleep now," she said and yawned.

"Yeah I can see that," he smiled and kissed her nose. "I just don't want to let you go."

"You'll have to. I'm not the kind of girl that you get into bed on the first date." Jacqueline giggled. "And I think me sleeping over would be something your mother would frown upon."

"You are absolutely right. My mother is actually quite old fashioned when it comes to that."

"So am I, in some ways anyway," she smiled. Hamah

"Okay then," he said and let her go.

"Yeah," she said, not wanting to go. "See you tomorrow then." She took up her helmet and began putting it on when he scooped her in his arms and kissed her passionately. It left her completely breathless.

"Yeah, see you," he breathed as he let her go. Jacqueline walked over to her bike on shaky legs. She waved to him as she drove down to the road. Hamilton waved back. She smiled to herself. Everything was going to be fine.

-xXx-

"So tell me everything!" Bella demanded as Jacqueline came back to the garage.

"Are you still up?" Jacqueline blinked in the light Bella had turned on.

"I couldn't sleep since I knew you where out with Ham," Bella said.

"What are you? My mother?" Jacqueline scolded.

"No, but I am your very curious friend," Bella giggled.

"Of course you are." Jacqueline sat down at the table. "I don't know what to say…"

"Oh, Jackie, stop it! I saw you, you know."

"I know you did."

"And?"

"Well…" Jacqueline started. "I am forgiven."

"Yes, I know. But that is not what I wanted to hear."

"I know, Bella. You want to hear every little horny detail," Jacqueline giggled.

"Yeah, that's right! Now tell me, is he a good kisser?"

"What are you? 15? Yes he is an excellent kisser. And he loves me." Jacqueline laughed. "Now I really need to get some sleep. I'm meeting Mrs Fleming tomorrow."

"Really?"

"Yeah, apparently she wants to meet me and, I don't know, get to know me better. Makes me wonder what Hamilton has been saying about me and him."

"Well, which mother would not want to meet the woman their son loves?"

"True. But that means that he has told her that he loves me!" Jacqueline grinned.

"I believe it does!"

"Oh, Bella," Jacqueline breathed. "Is this really happening to me? It's just too much. I never thought it possible to be this happy!"

"You better start believing it, Jackie. The fairytale isn't over yet!"

"What do you mean?" Jacqueline looked at her friend with searching eyes.

"You will see at the reunion."

"Bella, come on! What is it?"

"I'm not telling. You'll have to wait."

"You know I hate surprises, right?"

"I am pretty sure you will love this one!" The two friends giggled and finally went off to bed. Jacqueline fell asleep almost as soon as she put her head on the pillow.

**-TBC-**

**You've read it, now you know the drill…**


	16. Something Old and Something New

Love; Lost and Found

**Love; Lost and Found**

A _Young Americans_- story

By: jakeline

_Summary__: Jake/Jacqueline never told Hamilton her secret. Now they meet again 10 years later. How will Jacqueline tell Hamilton that Jake never really existed and that she was the boy he fell in love with? _

_Disclaimer__: I do not own the characters or the plot from 'Young Americans', but this story is mine. _

**Chapter 16: Something Old and Something New**

Hamilton woke up the next day with a content smirk on his face. He found it hard to believe that last night really had happened. His cell beeped announcing the arrival of a new text message. His smile grew wider as he saw that the sender was Jacqueline.

_Morning handsome. I'm missing u already. Can't wait till tonight. xoxo Jackie._

He chuckled. She loved him. He replied with:

_Me neither, but I must go to __Carson__. I'll pick u up at 6. xoxo, Ham. _

He got dressed quickly after a short shower and joined his mother at the breakfast table.

"You're looking quite pleased with yourself," his mother remarked.

"Well, I am," he replied with a goofy happy smile.

"Where did you go off to last night?"

"I went to Friendly's."

"I didn't hear you get back," his mother shot him a puzzled look.

"I was walking with Jackie," Hamilton answered with a wide grin.

"Ah, I see. Is she coming tonight?"

"Yes she is. Is dad gonna be here?"

"I don't think so, no. Perhaps it's best to start with one parent at a time," Kate smiled.

"True."

"So, what do you want for dinner?" his mother inquired.

"Don't know. I think she'll eat anything you put on the table," Hamilton replied with a smile. "She's like me."

"I see. What about lasagna?"

"Yeah, I haven't eaten that in ages! That would be awesome," he grinned and took a sip of his coffee and glanced at his watch. "Oh, I really got to be going now."

"Where are you going?"

"To Carson. I need to find a ring for Jackie." Kate seemed to ponder on that for a moment.

"You know what? Wait here for just a moment!" she said and left the kitchen. He could hear her rummaging around in her bedroom on the second floor. He wondered what she was up to now. He took another sandwich in waiting for her return.

She came back with small blue velvet box in her hand.

"Is that what I think it is?" Hamilton asked with eyes widened in wonderment.

"Yes, grandmother's ring. I want you to have it. To give to Jackie." She handed over the box. He wiped his hands before taking it.

"Are you sure about this?" he asked as he opened the box. He wondered what had brought this on. He took the ring out and admired the beautiful simplicity of the champagne diamond that was flanked by four marquise cut diamonds set on a ring in white gold. It was flawless and would suit Jackie perfectly.

"Are you really sure about this?" he asked again.

"Yes I am sure. They don't do rings like that anymore. I want you to have it." He got up and threw his arms around her, hugging her tightly.

"You are the best. I love you so much."

"Don't get too excited. This means you'll have to do the grocery shopping." Hamilton just grinned and looked at the ring again. He could see it on Jackie's finger. She would love it.

-xXx-

As Kate saw her son's face as she gave him her grandmother's ring she knew she had made the right decision. He really loved Jacqueline and that called for a perfect ring. She started to look forward to meet the woman who had captured her son's heart.

Now she had to do the other task for the day. Talk to her husband. She had made up her mind. She could not go on living this lie he called a marriage. Hamilton's determination had opened her eyes and she was sure he would support her in the process. She would be happy to leave Rawley Academy and start afresh someplace else. She had some money put away. It would be alright.

Kate knew she could count on both Hamilton and Finn, for obvious different reasons. She had always wondered why Finn had never married, though deep inside she knew the reason. Apart from being devoted to the school and its students he had always been holding a torch for her. Hoping she would come to her senses and leave her husband.

She knocked on her husband's office door.

"Come in," came his reply from the other side of the door. She entered the room and studied the man behind the desk. The man she had been married to for almost 30 years had now become like a stranger to her. His hair was turning grey but his blue eyes were piercing as ever as he looked up at her when she sat down in the chair opposite the desk. Kate drew a deep breath.

"Steven," she started, wondering where to begin.

"Kate?" he said with a surprised tone in his voice and slightly raised eyebrows. "Is anything wrong? Is it Hamilton?" he asked beginning to look worried.

"No, nothing's wrong. Well, yeah, but Hamilton's fine. He's met this girl and they are getting married," she threw the news out almost casually. Her husband's eyes widened.

"How come I haven't heard of this wedding before?"

"Well, it's kind of sudden and no date is set yet. He hasn't even proposed to her yet." Steven let out a sigh of relief. "And, if I may be frank, Steven, how much have you seen of your son since he arrived almost a week ago? When could he have told you?" She eyed him intensely.

"I've been busy, grading and getting ready for the reunion," Steven shrugged his shoulders, unwilling to meet her eyes. "So who's this girl then? I didn't even know he was dating anyone?"

"That is kind of the problem," Kate started, then hesitated unsure how to continue. "Do you remember Hamilton's friend Jake from school?"

"Was that the one with the scholarship?" he asked.

"No, that is Will," Kate sighed. Steven knew nothing of Hamilton's friends.

"Oh, sorry. The one that left then?"

"Yes, that is the one. Hamilton was devastated."

"So?"

"Well, as it turns out, Jake is a she. Her name is Jacqueline. That is the one Hamilton is marrying"

"What?" Steven's eyes widened in disbelief. "Say that again?"

"Jake Pratt's real name is Jacqueline Pratt. She fooled us all for three years in think she was a boy. I found her out just before the end of their last semester."

"You knew?! And why is my son marrying her?"

"Because he loves her, and has done since she left. That's why she left, by the way. She couldn't face the school and come clean then. She promised that she would tell him when I put her against the wall. But Hamilton apparently said some wrong things and she never told him either. But Hamilton believes she is truly sorry and wants to set everything straight."

"You are okay with this?!" Steven exclaimed, his face reddening with anger.

"You haven't seen the look on his face when he speaks of her. Who are we to stand in his way?"

"Kate, you cannot honestly say that you are totally okay with this?"

"I wasn't at first, no. I think she behaved very badly and that she perhaps isn't the most trustworthy, but if our son believes she is, I have to believe him."

"Are you serious?"

"Yes, and now we need to change Jake Pratt in the records to Jacqueline Pratt and put in that she attended Rawley girls and not the boys' academy."

"Kate, you realize that this is a felony?"

"Steven, please do this one thing for you son?" Kate said, starting to get annoyed with his stubbornness.

"I still can't believe that you are okay with this," Steven objected.

"Well, if you had been around more often you would have noticed the change in Hamilton. But since you're not, I don't believe you have anything to say in this matter!" Kate exclaimed heatedly. He was really starting to piss her off. "You're never there, Steven. You gave up your right to interfere with Hamilton's life a long time ago."

"Kate," he pleaded.

"Save it, Steven. It is too late." He looked at her with a puzzled face.

"What do you mean?"

"I can't go on living this lie, Steven."

"What are you saying, Kate?" Steven asked cautiously.

"You know what I mean," she spat. "We both know we can't go on like this. I think we should get a divorce. This marriage has been dead for years."

"That is not true, Katie," he said in a soft tone. He hadn't called her Katie since they were young. She glared at him.

"Oh, please, you haven't shared a meal with me since, God knows when! I don't even see you on a daily basis! I almost have to make a freaking appointment through your secretary to see you!"

"I can change..."

"It's a bit late for that. You've had years to change, but nothing has happened. You haven't even listened to me when I have tried to speak to you about it! I'm contacting a lawyer. And fix Jackie's record!" she snapped and left the room slamming the door shut behind her. When she got out of the building the tears started flowing. She couldn't believe that she had finally taken the step. She was free.

-xXx-

Jacqueline made an inventory of what she had in her bag. Meeting Mrs Fleming had not been something she had packed for. She had no idea of what to wear. Should she go for 'sweet and innocent' or her usual rock-chick-look? Jacqueline sighed. Bella was busy attending the gas station so Jackie was on her own. There was only one person left who could help her. Her mother. She took her cell and dialed her number praying for her to pick up. After three signals her call was transferred to voicemail.

"Hey, mom! Where are you? I really need your help. I'm meeting Ham's mom tonight and I have a clothing crises. By the way, he loves me!" she said and hung up. She really hoped her mother would call her up real soon. Not that she was in a hurry. It was only noon and Hamilton wasn't going to pick her up for another six hours but she was already nervous.

When her mother didn't call back for an hour she went down in search of Bella. She found her sitting outside in the sunshine reading a book waiting for customers.

"Hey, Bella. We've got a problem," she said.

"What is it?"

"I've got nothing to wear tonight!"

"Of course you have," Bella said.

"No, nothing suited for meeting Mrs Fleming. The only more festive I packed was the dress I'm wearing tomorrow."

"We'll figure something out," Bella promised.

"Maybe I should take the bike to Carson and check out the shops," Jacqueline pondered.

"That is one idea," Bella said.

"So, what should I go for? Do I want to look my normal self or like real daughter in law material? Id est… sweet."

"Like you with, perhaps, a sweet touch. Maybe I should come with you?" Bella said pointedly.

"Can you leave the station?"

"Will's home, he'll have to step up and show he's worthy of the family business," Bella chuckled. "We can take my truck instead. A bit more comfy than riding that hog."

"Yeah, I could really use some advice. It's easier for you two. You have known Mrs Krudsky since you were little. You don't have to impress her. I'm not exactly Mrs Fleming's favorite person in the world."

"Yet," added Bella with a smile. "If she loves her son, which she does, she will love you too. You don't have to worry, Jackie."

"I can't believe I'm this nervous! Well, yeah we did establish that I was mentally 15," she said with a faint smile. "This is worse than the reunion!"

"You will get through it, like you always do. Come on, let's get Will out here so we can get going!" Bella said briskly. She hurried inside to fetch Will and was back in two seconds with a boyfriend who didn't look to happy to be dragged outside to mind the gas station while his fiancée went shopping.

"Sorry, Will," Jacqueline said.

"It's okay," he answered and held up his laptop. "I can still work out here."

"What are you writing now?" Jacqueline asked curiously.

"Oh, nothing really. You will see when it's ready."

"I told you he was very secretive about it!" Bella pointed out before giving Will a kiss on the mouth. "See you later, babe." She took Jacqueline by the arm and drew her with her to the truck.

"I'm coming," Jacqueline said. They started driving in silence. Jacqueline tried to remember what kind of shops she had seen when she drove through Carson the night before. It felt like a lifetime ago. So much had happened since then.

"So what do you need? Skirt? Dress? Slacks?"

"I don't want to look like I have tried too hard. Black slacks, I think."

"Yeah, that's probably the best. Not to fancy," Bella agreed. They arrived at Carson and got out of the car.

"You'll have to lead the way, I haven't been here since, yeah well… you know," Jacqueline said.

"I know just the place," Bella said and took her under the arm and escorted her to a little shop that had a nice mixture of basic and more exquisite garments. Jacqueline soon found a pair of nice pinstriped black slacks that fitted her perfectly.

"Now, for the top," she mumbled as she searched through the racks of clothes.

"How about this?" Bella held up a pink laced top.

"I don't do pink," Jacqueline said and continued her search.

"Okay," Bella said and rolled her eyes. "What colors do you do?"

"Almost anything but pink," Jacqueline replied. "Well, I don't care for pastels really," she added.

"I see."

Suddenly Jacqueline found exactly what she was looking for. It was a top in dimmed green, low cut and trimmed with a lace sash just under the bust.

"Bella, I think I've found it!" she squealed and held the top up for her friend to see.

"Perfect! Now, can we go get some lunch? I'm starving!" Jacqueline laughed.

"You're sounding like me!"

**-TBC-**

**Happy Easter! You know what to do…**


	17. An Unexpected Lunch date

Love; Lost and Found

**Love; Lost and Found**

A _Young Americans_- story

By: jakeline

_Summary__: Jake/Jacqueline never told Hamilton her secret. Now they meet again 10 years later. How will Jacqueline tell Hamilton that Jake never really existed and that she was the boy he fell in love with? _

_Disclaimer__: I do not own the characters or the plot from 'Young Americans', but this story is mine. _

**Chapter ****17: An Unexpected Lunch date**

"Isn't that Bella's truck?" Hamilton asked Scout as they drove pass a familiar blue truck that was parked in Carson.

"Yeah, I think it is," Scout replied.

"I didn't know she was coming here," Hamilton said. He was kind of hoping Jackie was with her. He really did miss her already and thought it felt like an eternity until tonight.

They were on their way to the supermarket to buy what was needed for the dinner tonight. Hamilton had asked Will to join them also but he was busy writing. And since Hamilton didn't need his friend's advice for a ring anymore, well he let that one slide. Scout had promised to follow him to the shops anyways. Hamilton's mother had provided him with quite the list of things to get from the supermarket.

"Are you hungry?" Scout asked as Hamilton parked the car by the supermarket.

"Yeah, now that you mention it, I am. Lunch before shopping?" Hamilton grinned.

"Sounds like a plan!" They went off towards the mall where there was a nice food court.

-xXx-

Jacqueline and Bella sat in the food court inside the mall when Jacqueline saw Hamilton coming that way. Her face lit up in a grin.

"What?" Bella asked and followed her eyes. "Oh." She waved at Hamilton and Scout. Hamilton grinned as widely as Jacqueline and hurried over to them.

"Fancy meeting you here," he said and gave Jacqueline a deep kiss on the mouth. "God, it feels so nice to be able to do that!" Jacqueline giggled like a school girl, suddenly feeling very shy. She didn't really know where to look.

"Yeah, it's awesome! Care to join us?" She patted the seat next to her.

"Of course, we're just gonna go grab something," Hamilton said and went to one of the food stands with Scout in his trail.

"God, I love that man!" Jacqueline said to Bella, blushing slightly with sparkling eyes.

"I can see that on your goofy smile and your 15-year-old-attitude," Bella said mockingly.

"Yeah, I really need to grow up, don't I?" Jacqueline took a sip of her coke and then gulped down a bunch of fries. "But I can't help it!"

"To be honest, I am the same around Will, when he gives me the time of day that is," Bella scolded.

"So, what's with Will these days, Bella?" Scout, who had heard her latest remark, asked as they came back with their treys.

"Don't know," Bella shrugged. "He's not telling me anything either!"

"Bummer," Hamilton said and dug into his pizza slice.

"Hopefully he'll be his old charming self by the reunion tomorrow or I'll kick his ass," Bella laughed.

"Speaking of the reunion," Jacqueline said. "Is everything alright with your mom now? I mean I can go as me, and not Jake?"

"Yes she said she would take care of it," Hamilton said. Jacqueline let out a sigh of relief.

"Oh good. I cannot really pull off the whole Jake-thing anymore," Jacqueline said and glanced meaningly towards her bodily appearance.

"You won't have to. You're going as my girlfriend anyways," Hamilton said and kissed her neck. "You won't even have to tell who you are if you don't want to."

"Eew! Stop it, we're eating here," Scout said and threw a napkin at them.

"Who are you taking, Scout?" Jacqueline asked.

"Didn't you know? I'm going with Paige."

"Really? I thought nothing happened between you two," Jacqueline said with raised eyebrows.

"Not then, but I ran into her a couple of months ago, and well, one thing led to another. And yeah, we're getting married!" Scout grinned.

"Love is in the air," Bella said in a sing song voice which made the others stare at her and then burst out laughing. "Yeah, everyone's getting it, but me!" She frowned.

"I'm sure Will will come to his senses and realize what he's missing," Jacqueline said.

"If I didn't love him to bits I would leave him," Bella said but everyone around the table knew she would never leave him. She wouldn't even consider leaving him. She loved him too much and knew he would be making it up to her when he was finished writing his new novel.

-xXx-

As they came out of the mall they went their separate ways, but not without a make out session between Hamilton and Jacqueline. They let go of each other most unwillingly.

"Until tonight, then," Jacqueline said and took Bella under the arm. Hamilton and Scout went to the supermarket at Jacqueline and Bella went back to New Rawley.

"You really love Jackie, don't you?" Scout said as they watched the two women walk towards Bella's truck.

"Like mad," Hamilton answered with a grin. "That is why I'm proposing to her tomorrow."

"Really?" Scout raised a questioning eyebrow.

"Yeah, really. At the same place where she first kissed me."

"In London?" Scout said mockingly.

"No, Scout. On the roof." Scout looked confused. "Oh yeah, I never told you, but Jackie kissed me up on the rooftop once during summer session's first week. That's when I started to fall for her.

"I didn't know."

"No, no one knew. We decided to not talk about it then. And yeah, well, then nothing else happened. I thought I'd fix something up there. With a little help of course." Hamilton winked meaningly.

"Oh, and with a little help you mean of course me and the others?" Scout smirked.

"Yes, of course," Hamilton answered with a crooked smile. "Just to set everything up." Hamilton made a mental list of what he needed to get; lots of candles, preferably of different sizes, champagne, strawberries, some kind of music, nice glasses and a few other things.

"I can't believe you're actually going to propose tomorrow," Scout said admiringly.

"You should talk. You're getting married in August," Hamilton replied.

"I know, but that was a mutual decision. You're actually going to make a thing of it. I mean you are going to propose! Are you going down on one knee and everything?"

"Yes, well, Jackie deserves something special," Hamilton said with a loving smile.

"Dude, you are such a pansy!"

"I prefer the term romantic."

"What ever you call it, you make us other guys look bad," Scout said with a grin. Hamilton laughed. He couldn't help that he wanted tomorrow night to be special. "You realize of course that you're setting a standard for the rest of your life together?"

"I like to maintain a certain standard," Hamilton replied. They entered the supermarket and started to fill their trolley with food and stuff.

-xXx-

When it was two hours till Hamilton was going to pick her up her mother finally had the courtesy to call back.

"Finally!" Jacqueline exclaimed.

"So what's your status?" her mother asked.

"Sorted," Jacqueline said with a snort. "Like two hours ago!"

"I'm sorry, I've been really busy."

"It's okay, I dragged Bella away from the station. Seeing as I didn't pack anything for meeting the parent."

"I can't believe you're actually like together now!" her mother said.

"I know, me neither!"

"I am so happy for you, you know?"

"I know."

"So, what did you decide on wearing?"

"I found a pair of really nice pinstriped black trousers and a lovely top in dimmed green."

"Sounds perfect. You don't want to look as if you have tried to hard."

"Exactly what I thought. I bought a nice bottle of wine as a gift and a flower. Do you think it's too much?"

"No, I think that's very thoughtful of you."

"God! I'm so freaking nervous."

"You'll be fine. It's of course a big step to meet the parent, but it will be fine."

"Yeah, probably. Her inviting me shows that she really loves her son and makes an effort to get to know me. She can't be all bad. I mean she did raise an extraordinary son practically on her own."

"True. Okay, hun, I have to go. Call me on Saturday and tell me everything about the reunion and tonight, okay?"

"Yeah, talk to you later! Love you, bye."

"Love you too!" They hung up. Jacqueline studied herself in the mirror and was happy with the result she saw. Perfect for the first dinner with the parent.

-xXx-

"Hey mom! I'm home!" Hamilton called as he got back from Carson with a loaded car. He heard some muffled sobs from upstairs. "Mom? You okay?" He hurried upstairs and found her lying on her bed with her face buried in her hands, sobbing. "What's the matter?"

"We're getting a divorce," came the muffled response.

"What? Why? When?" Hamilton stuttered, dumbfounded.

"As soon as possible," Kate answered and sat up, wiping her face with a Kleenex. "I mean, who are we kidding? This hasn't been a marriage since you were little, Hamilton. It's better this way."

"Then why are you crying?"

"Lots of reasons, relief, sadness… exhaustion." Hamilton sat down on the bed and put his arm around her for comfort. "You have detested him for years, you shouldn't be so surprised."

"I know, but still, I always thought you'd work it out."

"It's better this way. You inspired me with your going after what you wanted, no matter what I or anyone else said."

"As long as you are happy, I'm happy. But how come you decided on it now?"

"The whole changing Jake into Jacqueline thing. He didn't want to. I got angry and found myself wondering why I haven loved him in the first place. He was so… He thought he still could interfere in your life even though he has not been a part of it for ages. And yeah, well, it kind of went downhill from there."

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay, don't worry about me. I'll be fine. I'm glad I finally had the courage to take the step. It will be fine. Don't worry about me."

"Do you want me to call Jackie and tell her to come another night?"

"No, of course not! You've already bought everything."

"So, Jackie's records are sorted?"

"Yes, everything is fixed." Hamilton sighed with relief.

"I'm gonna need your help tomorrow as well."

"Of course! We'll have to be cautious. You're not really allowed on the roof you know."

"I know. But that's the place where she first kissed me, and I want it to be special. I mean I'm going to propose for God's sake!" Hamilton exclaimed with widened eyes as the insight hit him. He really needed to write something down to make the proposal perfect.

"You'll do great!"

"Thanks, mom," he said and kissed her cheek. "Now, I really have to get ready for tonight."

**-TBC-**

**Reviews are as always most welcome and make me write faster…**


	18. Meet the Parent

Love; Lost and Found

**Love; Lost and Found**

A _Young Americans_- story

By: jakeline

_Summary__: Jake/Jacqueline never told Hamilton her secret. Now they meet again 10 years later. How will Jacqueline tell Hamilton that Jake never really existed and that she was the boy he fell in love with? _

_Disclaimer__: I do not own the characters or the plot from 'Young Americans', but this story is mine. _

**Chapter 18:**** Meet the Parent**

The closer it came to six o'clock the more nervous Jacqueline got. She was pacing outside the station, unable to sit still.

"Jackie, you're wearing out the pavement!" Bella exclaimed.

"I'm sorry, but I am just so nervous. What if she doesn't like me?"

"She will like you, don't worry!"

"Do I look ok?" She fidgeted with her hair which she had let hang free apart from pulling her bangs to the side with a hairpin.

"You look great!"

"Meeting the parent is not usually the second date thing, Bella. It's more of a I don't know, a tenth date thing."

"Jackie, you have been in love with the guy since you were 15. You can't back out now," Bella said as Hamilton pulled in infront of the garage.

"Hey, Bella, Jackie!" he called with a sunny smile.

"Here goes nothing," Jacqueline waved and hugged Bella before hurrying over to the car. She hopped into the passenger seat and placed a small kiss on Hamilton's cheek.

"You nervous?" he asked as he saw her tensed smile.

"Like hell," she replied.

"Don't worry. It will be fine." He drove up the road. "Oh, and don't ask about my father, unless she says anything. They're getting a divorce."

"Oh, no! Hamilton, I'm sorry."

"No, it's good. You know my father, he's had it coming for years. And it really was my mother's decision. Apparently my determination to have my way rubbed off on her," Hamilton smiled.

"But is it okay that I come? I mean, shouldn't you, I don't know, comfort her or celebrate or…"

"But we are celebrating, we're celebrating that I have found you!"

"You are such a dork, Hamilton Fleming," Jacqueline giggled lovingly.

"True, but a cute dork."

"A gorgeous dork," she admitted. He pulled in on the drive way to his former home.

"Are you ready to meet the parent?" he asked as they stepped out of the car.

"As ready as I'll ever be," Jacqueline said and took hold of his hand, in the other she had the bag with the wine and the flower. She smiled up at him and leaned towards his broad shoulder.

-xXx-

Kate peeked out of the window as she heard the car pull up. She was curious how Jacqueline behaved when she thought they were alone. Kate saw the loving smile she shot her son as they walked towards the house. That was all it took. Jacqueline Pratt was to be welcomed with open arms. Kate could not deny that Jacqueline's face looked sincere and that she most definitely loved Hamilton. She checked on the lasagna in the oven as she heard the two come inside.

"Hey, mom? We're here," Hamilton called.

"In the kitchen," Kate called back. She tossed the salad to make sure it was mixed properly. Hamilton led Jacqueline inside with a proud smile on his face.

"Mom, may I present Jacqueline Pratt." Kate took the hand Jacqueline held out and smiled towards her.

"Very nice to meet you," Kate said.

"Likewise, Mrs Fleming," Jacqueline replied with a nervous smile.

"Oh, call me Kate. Mrs Fleming makes me feel old!" Kate laughed.

"Okay, Kate it is," Jacqueline said with a grin. She suddenly thought of the bag she was holding. "I bring gifts!" Kate took it and found a bottle of red wine and a really nice flower.

"You shouldn't have."

"I wanted to. Can I help with anything?" Jacqueline asked and looked around.

"No, everything is set and the lasagna is ready any minute now. Hamilton, why don't you show Jacqueline into the dining room?"

"Okay," her son answered and took Jacqueline under the arm and ushered her towards the dining room.

-xXx-

"See, I told you not to worry," Hamilton said and placed a kiss on her cheek. He was so happy that his mother seemed to be fine with Jackie.

"I know, but it's still a bit intimidating meeting the parent at such an early stage of a relationship."

"But we have known each other since for ever," Hamilton objected.

"I know. But this, us, is still very new," Jacqueline said. "I'm not complaining, mind you! I love it!"

"Yeah, why waste any time?" Hamilton grinned, thinking of what he was going to ask her the next day.

"Very true," she admitted and kissed him passionately on the mouth. A slight cough brought them back to reality and they turned to find Kate in the doorway with the lasagna in her hands.

"Aren't you a bit old for making out sessions?" she remarked with a sly smile.

"Mom!" Hamilton blushed. Jacqueline was even redder.

"Anyway, dinner is served," his mom said and gestured towards the table that was set by the window. They sat down and Kate served the wine.

"So, Jacqueline, I understand that you have been working as a model?"

"Yeah, but only to pay my way through school. Now I've just started my own business."

"Doing what?"

"I'm a web designer, making solutions on the web, building sites, a bit of support, that kind of stuff," Jacqueline answered.

"I don't know anything about that sort of things," Kate smiled.

"Jackie has always been into computers," Hamilton smiled.

"Perhaps she can help with you website," his mother said.

"Yeah, I think you need it too," Jacqueline giggled. "It's kind of amateurish."

"Shut up!" Hamilton said and rolled his eyes. "I've done it myself."

"As I said; amateurish," Jacqueline said and nudged him in the side. "I will fix it for you, free of charge, of course."

-xXx-

To her surprise Jacqueline found that it was very easy to speak to Kate once the first awkwardness disappeared. Jacqueline admitted that she had been thinking very nasty thoughts about her all these years. But she realized Kate had only acted as was expected of a wife of a dean and a concerned mother. They chatted freely now and soon came to like each other. Jacqueline helped Kate clear the table and followed her into the kitchen, feeling the need of saying something about her scheme in high school.

"Look, I'm really, really sorry for what I did in high school. Let's just say I panicked when I was going to tell Hamilton about who I really was," Jacqueline said and put down the plates by the sink.

"It's okay. I was kind of being a bitch, anyway," Kate smiled. "I don't even remember why I was so angry with you." Jacqueline smiled.

"Well, I did fool you into thinking I was someone else for like three years. I don't blame you," Jacqueline said. "But I did love Hamilton then, as much as I do now."

"I know," Kate said and took her hand. "And I am glad that he found you again. He was heartbroken when you left. It pained me to see him cry and not be able to tell him why you left or who you really were. Perhaps if I had told him, he would have tried to find you. I don't know…"

"I am so very sorry for putting you though this for all these years."

"I know you are. But you are here now and apologizing. That's what matters."

"Yes, I will make it up to you. I'm coming clean at the reunion tomorrow."

"You don't have to do that you know," Kate objected.

"No, I know, but I want to, for my own sake."

"Hamilton and I will be there to support you," Kate said and actually hugged her. Jacqueline was startled by the other woman's action but hugged her back.

"I think we're going to get along just fine, you and I," Jacqueline said.

"I am sure we will," Kate smiled back.

-xXx-

"What are my two favorite women talking about in here?" Hamilton asked as he came out to the kitchen founding them hugging.

"Oh, this and that. Girl talk," Kate said and turned to him.

"Really?"

"Yeah, Hammie, girl talk," Jacqueline walked over to him and kissed him on the cheek whispering: "I love you."

"I love you too," he whispered back and was once again filled with the most delicious feeling of joy. He was so glad that his mother had accepted Jackie and they seemed to get along just fine now. He was really looking forward to the reunion and the little surprise he had in store for Jackie. He was fairly certain that she would say yes to him.

"Time for dessert people," his mother giggled taking out a large bowl of ice cream and chocolate sauce.

"Lovely," Hamilton said with a wide grin. He could not get enough of ice cream. They sat down at the dinner table again and dug in.

-xXx-

"I'll walk you home," Hamilton said to her as the time drew near midnight. "We'll have to get our beauty sleep."

"You perhaps, but I am naturally pretty with or without sleep," she answered with a playful nudge at his side. "Thanks ever so much for dinner, Kate. It was delicious." She shook Mrs Fleming's hand.

"Oh, come here," Kate said and scooped her in for another tight hug. "I'm so glad for you both." Jacqueline wondered what she meant by that, but didn't ask.

"I see you tomorrow!" She took Hamilton's hand and walked off in the night.

"I'm so glad you get along with mom," Hamilton whispered.

"Of course, I'm quite lovable, when I want to," she giggled.

"Like always?" Hamilton remarked with a sly smile.

"Perhaps." She nestled her arm around his waist.

"Are you ready to meet the rest of the school tomorrow?"

"With you, Bella, Scout, Will and your mom to back me up? I am ready to meet anyone." She kissed him on the cheek, utterly happy that he was in her life again.

"You will of course have to face my dad as well," Hamilton said.

"I have a way with men," she giggled. "Fathers tend to like me more than mothers."

Hamilton's face darkened slightly. "You have done this before, I take it? Meeting the parents?"

"I am 28… and not a nun," she giggled playfully.

"I see…"

"Haven't you?" She looked up at him.

"Well, no, not really. I mean, I've come close." He shrugged.

"To tell you the truth, no one has ever come close to meeting my mom." His face brightened up again. "No one I've ever met has stood a chance compared to you," she admitted, violently blushing, which was rewarded with a wet kiss on her mouth.

"Me too," he whispered. "Nothing compares to you."

**-TBC-**

_Yes, I know, two rather boring chapters… But the next one will be more __intense. _

_Lots of things happen during the reunion. I promise!_


	19. The Reunion

Love; Lost and Found

**Love; Lost and Found**

A _Young Americans_- story

By: jakeline

_Summary__: Jake/Jacqueline never told Hamilton her secret. Now they meet again 10 years later. How will Jacqueline tell Hamilton that Jake never really existed and that she was the boy he fell in love with? _

_Disclaimer__: I do not own the characters or the plot from 'Young Americans', but this story is mine. _

**Chapter 19****: The Reunion**

Hamilton kept himself busy the whole day with preparations for his proposal that night. The rooftop had been decorated and furnished beyond recognition. His mother had really helped him a lot and so had the rest of the gang, but taken turns so that Jackie wouldn't suspect anything. He also helped his mother with setting up the refreshments in the ball room. He was getting really nervous about tonight.

"Are you all set now?" Bella asked as they walked down from the roof.

"Yes everything's done," he smiled widely. "The ring is safe and sound in my tux."

"She's gonna be so surprised."

"You think?"

"Yeah, she has absolutely no idea of what you're planning," Bella assured him.

"Do you think it's too fast?" he asked worriedly.

"Perhaps a little, but she had been pining over you for 10 years," she said mockingly.

"Has she really?" Hamilton shot her a surprised look.

"She won't admit it if you ask her, but I know she has had you as her ideal man to compare everyone with."

"But you think she'll say yes?"

"Of course! Which girl could say no to such a romantic gesture? She's gonna swoon!" Bella assured him. "She's really a hopeless romantic when it comes down to it, though she would never ever admit to it, of course."

"I figured," Hamilton smiled. Jackie didn't really seem the romantic type up front, she was kind of a tomboy and that was kind of what he liked about her. His stomach fluttered with anticipation when he thought that he would actually ask her to be his wife tonight.

-xXx-

Jacqueline was both exited and terrified when thinking of the reunion that night. She was kind of regretting that she had said that she would come clean to the whole student body at once. But it had to be done. She had to make everything right. She was kind of looking forward to see Ryder's reaction since he had been the one spreading the gay rumors. _Payback's a bitch_. She admitted that she was going to enjoy his chocked face as she declared that she was Jake. Perhaps he would remember hitting on her the other day and think she had gone through a sex change. That would satisfy her immensely. Then she could say that she had been a girl all along. She wanted to see him wince.

Jacqueline and Bella were ready to be picked up by the limo Will had rented. They were going to arrive in style. Hamilton was meeting them outside the entrance. Jacqueline felt great in her dress and she had put her hair up with hairpins and sprayed it with glitter. She hoped Hamilton was going to like it.

"Do you think people will recognize you?" Bella asked.

"I don't know. Trouble is, will they know me as Jacqueline the model or Jake the boy? How do I tell them?" Jacqueline asked nervously.

"I dunno. I suppose it must include a microphone and a stage to make it worth while."

"I know. I better work on my speech." Just as she said that the limo pulled in in front of the station and Will hopped out to open the doors for them.

"My ladies," he said with a small bow.

"Thank you, Will," Bella said and took the hand he offered her and entered the car. Jacqueline did the same. Scout and Paige were already in there.

"Hi, I'm Paige," Paige said and held out her hand to Jacqueline.

"Yeah, I know, I'm Jackie also known as Jake," Jacqueline said and studied Paige's reaction. Scout had obviously not told her.

"Oh. Okay…" Paige looked completely confused.

"You haven't told her?" Jacqueline said to Scout.

"Sorry, haven't had the time," Scout shrugged.

"Told me what?" Paige asked.

"Jackie is Jake Pratt, she's a girl, she and Ham are together and they are not gay," Bella said.

"Huh?" Paige looked lost.

"My name is Jacqueline Pratt, also known as the Jake Pratt you knew in high school. I dressed up as a boy to see if my mother even cared for what I was doing. I will explain everything tonight," Jacqueline said. "Congrats on the engagement by the way."

"Oh, thanks," Paige said still looking confused. "I finally got him hooked!" She looked like she was beginning to understand that she had known Jacqueline for years.

"That is a beautiful ring," Jacqueline said and admired the large rock on her finger.

"Guess Bella and Will are next?" Paige said pointedly.

"Oh, well, um, yeah," Will stuttered with flushed face.

"Perhaps we just elope to Vegas or something," Bella said and kissed Will on the cheek.

-xXx-

Hamilton was standing outside the entrance to the school and grew more impatient by the minute. He could not wait to see Jackie and hold her in his arms again. He checked his pocket to make sure the little velvet box was still there. He drew a deep breath to calm his nerves down. Everything was going to be fine. He saw the limo pull into the driveway and he walked down the stairs to meet it. He opened the door and found that Jacqueline was the one to exit it first. He took her hand and drew her in for a big kiss.

"I've missed you!" he breathed.

"Oh, Ham, you saw me yesterday," she giggled.

"You look like, totally foxy," he said after taking her appearance in, the ruby dress fitted her perfectly and was halter-necked with half bare back.

"You think?" she said with a content smile and twirled around before him.

"Yeah, totally," he scooped her in for another kiss. "Now, let's make an entrance." They walked up the stairs and into the school building. He wrapped his arm around Jacqueline's waist and smiled to some former class mates. He felt so lucky that she was back in his life and wanted the whole world to know. They all walked to the welcome table and searched for their name tags.

As his mother had promised Jacqueline's name was on one tag, not Jake's. They took a glass of punch and entered the large ballroom and had a look around. Hamilton saw a few familiar faces in the crowd but none he really wanted to say hi to. He had his friends around him now and his girlfriend by his side. He smiled at Jacqueline.

Hamilton spotted his father next to the built up stage but didn't acknowledge his presence. His mother was on the other side of the room, talking to Finn. Hamilton suddenly saw a red head he recognized making her way towards them.

"Hi Hamilton, remember me?" she smiled flirtatiously and Hamilton felt Jackie's grip on his hand tightened.

"Eh, no?" he said even though he knew who she was. It was Lena, the girl he and Jake had fought over, or well, Hamilton had been jealous of Lena's interest in Jake.

"It's me, Lena, you know? The Cali-chick?" That was what they had called her in high school.

"Yeah, right, Lena," he said hesitatingly, faking to search his memory.

"We went to the Cotillion together that first summer session," Lena helped him.

"Oh yeah, that's right," Hamilton smiled.

"Great! So, how've you been?" Jackie nudged his arm.

"Oh, just great. Hey, Lena, this is my girlfriend, Jackie," he said and noticed Lena's face turn slightly redder.

"Oh, hi," Lena said and held her hand out to Jacqueline.

"Hi," Jacqueline said ant took the hand and shook it.

"Don't I know you from somewhere?" Lena asked.

-xXx-

There it was, the question Jacqueline had been dreading. She felt her face go first red and then white wile thinking of what to say.

"Perhaps," she said nonchalantly to buy some time.

"Did you go to Rawley Girls?" Lena asked.

"Not really," she said evasively. Before Lena could ask any more questions they were interrupted by Ryder. Lena continued eying Jacqueline intensely.

"Hello lovelies and Batgirl," he smirked. "Still no Jake huh? I am so sorry Ham, looks like we won't be having a teary gay-reunion after all," Ryder continued with a fake sad voice. Hamilton glared at Ryder.

"Shut the fuck up, Ryder," he said through gritted teeth. Suddenly Lena's eyes widened and her mouth dropped open in shock.

"Jake!" she exclaimed, pointing at Jacqueline, "You're Jake!" Jacqueline went red.

"What?" Ryder's shocked face was a sight to be seen.

"Yes, that's me," Jacqueline finally said. Ryder stared at her with disgust, obviously thinking of how he had hit on her the other day.

"How? Why? What?" he stuttered looking completely horrified.

"I'm a girl. I've always been a girl. I was going to tell everyone later, but I might as well do it now," Jacqueline sighed and nearly laughed at Ryder's relieved look. She gulped down the rest of the punch and made her way to the stage. She took the microphone and called for attention.

"Hey, everybody! May I have your attention for a couple of minutes, please?" The room went silent and all eyes turned to the stage. Someone put on the stage lights. "Some of you might recognize me from magazines and stuff as Jacqueline Pratt, the model." Someone started clapping and then someone whistled but was hushed. "Eh, yeah, well. Then there might be some of you who recognize me from my time at Rawley, but not as Jacqueline, but as Jake Pratt. Yes, that was me," she said as she heard the crowd gasp. She laughed nervously. "I know what you are thinking. Great surgeons, right?" There was a hesitant chuckle from the crowd. She sought out the faces of her friends in the back. They were all smiling encouragingly.

She drew a deep breath and continued: "But no, no surgeries. I'm all woman. Always have been. I enrolled at the Boys' Academy as Jake just to get my mother's attention. Yes a bit desperate, I admit, but there it is. I was meant to leave as soon as she had found out. But then she never did, and I met friends here. And someone else, someone special. That was not part of the plan." She smiled shakily. "And I just stayed and let the charade go on, just because I didn't dare to tell. I didn't want to be kicked out. This was the best thing that ever had happened to me. I couldn't lose the friends I had met here. I couldn't lose Hamilton." She gestured towards the spot where Hamilton and her friends were standing.

The crowd turned to Hamilton who was just beaming.

"Yes, that's my man. I have loved him since I was 15. It's true. And I am so, so very sorry for whatever harm that may I have caused. Dean Fleming, I am so sorry I lied to you and your wife and the rest of the teachers here." She sighed. "Well, that's all that I wanted to say, really. Have a continued pleasant evening." She bowed slightly and the crowd started clapping sporadically. She could see that they didn't know what to think.

She made her way to her friends. Some stopped her on the way, saying how cool that was to say that in front of everybody.

"You are so brave!" Bella said and hugged her.

"Oh I need a drink!" Jacqueline said, feeling how she shivered throughout her body. "That was probably _the_ scariest thing I have ever done. But I'm glad that the truth is out."

"Yeah, me too," Hamilton said and kissed her. "Let's get something to drink and then I have a surprise for you."

"You have? Really?" Jacqueline asked astonished and glanced towards Bella who just gave her two thumbs up.

"I just need to take care of something, okay?" Hamilton said as they had gotten their drinks. "Don't go too far. I'll be back soon."

"Okay," Jacqueline promised and smiled. During the time Hamilton was away a few of her old class mates came forward to say that they had always known something was odd with her. No one seemed mad, no one really seemed to care.

"Are you ready?" Hamilton whispered in her ear.

"Yeah," she said and turned to him.

"Put this on," he said and handed her a dark scarf.

"What is this? Where are you taking me?" she asked at looked suspiciously at him.

"Trust me," he smiled. Jacqueline put the scarf over her eyes and Hamilton led her away.

**-TBC-**

_Only two more chapters to go… _


	20. Marry Me?

**Love; Lost and Found**

A _Young Americans_- story

By: jakeline

_Summary__: Jake/Jacqueline never told Hamilton her secret. Now they meet again 10 years later. How will Jacqueline tell Hamilton that Jake never really existed and that she was the boy he fell in love with? _

_Disclaimer__: I do not own the characters or the plot from 'Young Americans', but this story is mine. _

**Chapter 20: Marry me?**

Hamilton ushered her carefully through the empty hallways of Rawley and up the stairs to the roof. Hamilton felt a rush of adrenaline surge through his body as he led Jacqueline through the door and outside on the rooftop. He let his eyes sweep over the setting he had made. The champagne was chilling in the bucket on ice, every light was lit and the stereo played soft music in the background. The ground was covered in rugs he had borrowed from his parent's house. He was satisfied with what he had accomplished with a little help from his friends and mother.

"Where are we?" Jackie asked.

"You'll see," Hamilton whispered in her ear as he led her to the middle of the rooftop. "You ready?"

"Yes, of course!" Jacqueline exclaimed. He untied the scarf and let it fall. "Oh my god!" she breathed as she looked around. "Where are we?"

"Don't you remember?" he asked. She inspected her surroundings.

Suddenly it dawned on her: "Are we on the rooftop?"

"Yes we are," Hamilton answered and put his arms around her. "The place where you first kissed me." She giggled softly.

"So your remember that?"

"How could I forget?" He kissed her on the mouth.

"You have totally gone all the way with this," she mumbled. "It's beautiful!"

"I had a little help," he said. "Champagne, my dear?" Hamilton walked over to the bucket and took the bottle and opened it with a pop.

"Don't mind if I do," Jacqueline said and took a glass and held it out for him to fill.

-xXx-

Jacqueline was amazed by what he had done. It was the most romantic thin anyone had ever done for her and she loved him ever more for it. She gazed out over the area that was filled with lit candles, chairs, rugs on the ground. She hardly recognized the place where she had first kissed him. She remembered that time as if it were yesterday. She had not been able to help herself but to kiss him. He had been so adorable clueless. They had been kids then. Now here they were again, all grown up and mature and together at last.

"To us," she said and held up her glass.

"To us," he smiled and let his glass carefully cling against hers. They took a sip. Jacqueline walked over to the edge of the roof and gazed out over the rolling hills that were Rawley Academy grounds. The sun was almost set and painted the sky in various pinks and lilacs. She sighed and took in the beautiful sight. She could sense Hamilton's presence behind her as he came closer. The warmth of his body beamed towards her back as he cradled her in his arms and held her close. She sighed once more, thinking she was the happiest woman in the world. She leaned back in his embrace. He kissed her neck and she felt shivers rummage through her body. Tingling sensations went up and down her spine. She put down her glass on the edge and turned to face him.

Her lips shivered slightly of anticipation as her face came closer to his. She looked into his deep blue eyes. His hands found her face and cradled it carefully. After what seemed like an eternity their lips finally met. She could taste the bubbly champagne on his lips and she eagerly explored his mouth.

-xXx-

"I wonder how they are doing up there," Bella said and raised her eyes towards the roof. They were standing outside the ball room to get some fresh air. Jacqueline was the talk of the party.

"I am sure they are fine," Will whispered in her ear. "Now, let's focus on us." He drew her in for a deep kiss.

"Will!" Bella squealed as his lips finally left hers a long time later. "What has gotten into you?"

"I am so sorry that I have been so preoccupied lately. This new book is completely different from my other work," he said with an honest look on his face. Bella's heart melted.

"It's fine. You are totally forgiven."

"Oh fantastic, because, I had this thought…" he said and kissed her neck, trailing down towards her shoulder.

"Will! Someone could see us!" Bella shivered under the soft kisses.

"Hamilton has inspired me," he whispered as his mouth worked his way over and down towards her chest.

"Uh huh," Bella could hardly breathe, let alone speak.

"I was thinking, perhaps we could ask Ham and Jackie if they would share their wedding day with us?" Bella's heart stopped for a moment, then it kick started again racing faster than ever.

"Will, are you saying what I think you are saying?" she took his face in her hands and jerked his head up so that his eyes were leveled with hers.

"Yes, Bella Banks, I am asking you to marry me," he said and kissed her on the mouth as he reached into his dinner jacket. He got down on one knee and peered up at her. "Bella Banks, will you do me the honor of being my wife?" He opened the velvet box and revealed a beautiful diamond ring. Bella felt her eyes watering and a tear slipped down her cheek.

"Yes, Will Krudsky! Of course I will!" Will got up and put the ring on Bella's finger and kissed her again.

-xXx-

Hamilton cradled her face with his hands and moaned into her mouth. His blood was burning. Her hands slipped under his jacket and explored his upper body. His breathing quickened and his body's response to her searching hands was explosive. He circled one arm around her waist and drew her even nearer. His mouth left hers and trailed down her jaw and neck. He could feel her pulse beat fast under the soft skin. She let out a moan.

Hamilton was completely lost in her. They were the only two that mattered in the world right now. He still found it hard to believe she was actually in his arms. Loving him, wanting him… Her hands found their way in underneath his shirt. Her hands against his naked skin set off a thousand of little fires. His hand found the zip on the back of her dress. He undid it and let his hand explore the nakedness of her back.

Laughter from below brought him back to his senses and he took a step back. Panting they stared at each other.

"I'm gonna need a little help," Jackie finally said and turned her back towards him so that he could redo the zip. Her pale skin shone in the dark. He took a step closer.

"Of course," he said and helped her with shaking hands. He placed a kiss on her shoulder.

"Got a bit carried away there, didn't we?" she giggled.

"Behaving like 15 year olds," Hamilton mumbled. Hamilton had to take several deep breaths to calm himself down. He took a sip of the champagne. He wanted nothing else than to rip the dress off Jackie's body and make love to her. He knew they would most probably not be disturbed, but he didn't want to risk anything.

Hamilton turned his face to the now starlit sky above for strength to ask the question he had brought her up there to ask. He shot her a look and saw that she also had turned her gaze to the sky. The moon fell on her delicate face and made her look almost unearthly beautiful. She took his breath away.

"Hamilton?"

"Hmm?" He realized she had turned her eyes to him.

"You are staring."

"Have I told you how beautiful you look tonight?" he smiled.

"Not in those words," she grinned. He remembered that he had called her 'foxy' and felt his face go red.

"Oh," was all he offered as response.

"But, I haven't told you that you look absolutely gorgeous in that tux," Jacqueline said.

"Why thank you, madam," Hamilton said and straightened his jacket. He drew a deep breath. He had to ask her. It was now or never. He took a step closer to her, gazed into her eyes. She smiled at him. He dropped to one knee and took her left hand. Her eyes widened.

"Hamilton, what are you doing?"

"Jacqueline Pratt, I am so glad that you are back in my life. I will not let you get away this time. I'm totally in love with you. I know this is perhaps a bit soon, but I cannot live without you. You are the one! Will you marry me?" He reached into his jacket pocked and took out the blue velvet box.

-xXx-

Jacqueline stared down at Hamilton where he stood on one knee, holding her hand. Her heart beat faster than ever before. Thoughts rambled through her mind. Hamilton let go of her hand and opened a small blue velvet box he had gotten from his pocket. She stared down at the beautiful diamond ring that was glistening in the box. She drew a deep breath.

"I don't know what to say," she stammered.

"Say yes!" he urged. She stared down into his blue eyes and felt her heart fill with bubbling joy. She dropped down in front of him and threw her arms around his neck.

"Yes, yes, yes," she said as she kissed his face. Hamilton grinned at her and kissed her hard on the mouth. He took the ring out of the box and put it on her finger. She smiled and held it up so she could admire the simple beauty of the champagne colored rock.

"I love you," Hamilton whispered and kissed her again.

"I love you too," she breathed into his mouth. There was no use holding back now. She let her hands find their way in underneath his shirt again. His skin felt so nice and warm under her hands. She followed the muscles on the back and sighed contentedly.

-xXx-

Hamilton couldn't believe it. She said yes! He believed himself to be the happiest man in the world. The ring suited her perfectly just as his mother had said.

He explored her body and soon they fell down on the soft rug on the ground. He didn't want to stop. He wanted her, right there right now. He had waited for so long. His hands found the zip on her dress again and this time his hands slipped in underneath the fabric. As his hands touched her naked skin he was rewarded with a soft moan from her mouth.

Her hands helped him out of his jacket and shirt. His hands freed her of her dress. His mouth explored her neck and trailed down towards her chest. She sighed with pleasure and he continued downwards. Her hands unbuttoned his pants and suddenly she was on top of him.

She smiled down at him. Hamilton felt like he was home.

**-TBC-**

_Sorry it took me so long. Hope you liked it._


	21. Nothing’s Gonna Change My Love For You

**Love; Lost and Found**

A _Young Americans_- story

By: jakeline

_Summary__: Jake/Jacqueline never told Hamilton her secret. Now they meet again 10 years later. How will Jacqueline tell Hamilton that Jake never really existed and that she was the boy he fell in love with? _

_Disclaimer__: I do not own the characters or the plot from 'Young Americans', but this story is mine. _

**Chapter 21: ****Nothing's Gonna Change My Love For You**

Jacqueline and Hamilton lay under a rug on the rooftop in each other's arms, gazing up at the stars above.

"That was definitely worth waiting for," Jacqueline said with a content sigh. Hamilton was the most attentive lover she had ever had. Then again, she had never loved anyone as she loved Hamilton.

"Totally," Hamilton answered and kissed her naked shoulder.

"Perhaps we should join the others," Jacqueline suggested. She longed to show off the ring on her finger.

"Later," Hamilton whispered and his kisses continued down underneath the rug. Jacqueline found that she was easily persuaded as he worked his way down her stomach. Her body trembled as he found the right spot.

-xXx-

"What is taking them so long?" Bella asked impatiently. "I thought Jackie was going to run down as fast as she could to show off the rock on her finger."

"Perhaps they are celebrating in their own way," Scout suggested with wiggling eyebrows.

"Ew! Scout!" Bella exclaimed and hit him with her purse.

"Bella, be honest, you just wonder because you want to show off your own ring," Will said.

"Perhaps a little," Bella admitted. "But I also want to ask her about your idea to have a double wedding."

"Why?" Will asked.

"Lot's plans to discuss."

"But, it's like a year away," Will remarked.

"Doesn't have to be. Why wait? We've known each other since forever."

"True," admitted Will. "But what's the rush? I'm sure Ham and Jackie wants to spend some quality time together before getting married."

"Perhaps. But I don't want to wait too long. I want you to be my husband, like yesterday," Bella giggled.

"Then maybe, we'll have two weddings instead," Will suggested.

"Yeah, well, we'll see," Bella said and kissed him.

-xXx-

"Now we really have to make an appearance downstairs, Hammie," Jacqueline said. Hamilton groaned inside but admitted that she was right. He knew the others were waiting for them, including his mother. They had the rest of their lives together. Tonight he could share her with the rest of the world.

"Yeah, you're right," he said. They scrambled onto their feet and started retracing their scattered clothes.

"I really hope the groundskeeper hasn't installed a camera up here," Jacqueline giggled as she put on her dress. "Otherwise we gave him one hell of a show."

"Wouldn't it be fun to find ourselves on youtube?" Hamilton sniggered.

"Yeah, I can see the headlines 'Former top model gets frisky during reunion. Sex video found online.'" Jacqueline said.

"With a gorgeous dark mysterious man," Hamilton added.

"You're not that mysterious, Hammie," Jacqueline protested.

"True, but you have to admit that I am gorgeous," he said and grinned.

"Yes, you are." She turned her back to him so he could help her with the zip in her dress.

"All set," he said and patted her on her shoulder.

"Yep, but what about all this?" she asked and gestured towards all the stuff on the rooftop.

"I'll take care of it tomorrow," Hamilton said and took her by the hand. "Come on my lovely, let's join the party!"

-xXx-

Jacqueline checked her make up in her little mirror before entering the ballroom again. She smiled at her rosy cheeks and glittering eyes. Nobody could be mistaking in what they had been up to. She put on some lipgloss and decided that she looked presentable.

"There you guys are!" Bella called as they entered. "We thought you've gone off to Vegas or something."

"No, not yet," Jacqueline replied. She suddenly noticed something sparkling on her friend's hand. "Bella! What is that?!" she pointed at Bella's left hand.

"Oh, this?" Bella said nonchalantly and held out her left hand for everyone to see. "Yeah, Will and I are engaged!"

"That is so wonderful!" Jacqueline hugged her friend. "You and me at the same day!"

"I know, can you believe it?!" Bella shone like the sun. "Finally!" She looked up at her fiancée with a grin.

"About freaking time," laughed Jacqueline.

"Tell me about it," Bella agreed and took her friend under the arm and led her outside. "Now tell me everything!"

Jacqueline looked at her, feigning not to understand what she was talking about: "About what?"

"The rooftop?" Bella rolled her eyes.

"You don't want every horny little detail," Jacqueline said with a smile thinking of all they had done up there.

"Yes, I do," Bella replied.

"No, you really don't," Jacqueline said.

"Ok, fine, I don't. But I want to know everything else!"

"What can I say, Hamilton is a hopeless romantic. And it was beautiful. I can't believe he did that for me. It's just too much."

"Nothing's too much for the person you love."

"No, I guess you're right." Jacqueline smiled as she gazed out in the night.

"So, have you set a date yet?"

"Oh, no not yet. There really is no rush," Jacqueline said. She wanted some time with Hamilton alone before sharing their love with the world.

"No you're right. Will had this crazy idea of a double wedding," Bella said.

"But you want to get married like tomorrow?"

"Yeah, I've been waiting for this for ages," Bella admitted with a slight blush.

"I know, and I don't mind really. The more weddings, the merrier?" Jacqueline smiled. She wouldn't mind having her wedding day all to herself. Competing with another bride… Nope, that was not for her. She liked the attention. She was sure Bella would think the same.

"I've been planning this wedding since, well, forever," Bella said.

"I know, and I hardly believed I was getting married at all," Jacqueline said with a laugh. They were so different.

"I know you didn't. But I'm so glad that you found Hamilton again. You are so meant for each other," Bella hugged her friends arm. "I am so happy for you."

"I'm very lucky that Hamilton got over his anger," Jacqueline said. "I don't know what I would have done if hadn't."

"Let's not talk about that now! Everything worked out for the best!" Bella said cheerfully.

"You're right."

-xXx-

Hamilton got congratulations from everywhere. His mother smiled happily as he told her Jackie had accepted him.

"I am so happy for you, Hamilton. You deserve the best," she said and squeezed him in an embrace.

"Thanks mom," Hamilton said and hugged her back. He had never been happier in his life.

"So, have you set a date yet?" his mother asked and peered at him.

"Jeez, not yet!" Hamilton looked slightly stressed. "I think we need to spend some time together first, before starting to plan a wedding."

"I'm just kidding," Kate said. "I don't want you to rush into anything. Well, more than the engagement, that is." Kate laughed.

"I've known Jackie ages, but there's stuff I want to do before we settle down and have kids."

"Oh grandchildren!" Kate clapped her hands excitedly.

"All in due time, mom," Hamilton said. "I don't even know where we'll live yet."

"As long as it's not too far from me," Kate said.

"Where are you gonna go?"

"I have no idea what so ever," Kate said. "I haven't had time to think about that yet."

"I really wouldn't mind raising my children around here somewhere," Hamilton said. The town was great for children. Especially since he was quite sure Bella and Will would be staying in New Rawley. Their kids could grow up together.

"No it's a great place for kids. But there's nothing for me here," Kate said. "Maybe I'll move to Carson. That'll be far enough."

"As I said, I haven't even talked to Jackie about this. It was just a thought I had," Hamilton said. It was still hard too believe that he and Jackie was spending the rest of their life together.

-xXx-

"Hey mom?" Jacqueline said as her mother answered her phone.

"Hey Jackie!"

"Glad I got hold of you," Jacqueline said, trying to remain calm before telling her mother the great news.

"What's up? How did it go last night? And with Mrs Fleming?"

"Ah, it was great. I held a little speech and everyone forgave me. Mrs Fleming is quite charming. She gladly forgave me."

"I'm glad. I told you everything was going to be fine."

"I know you did, but you know me. Always the drama queen," Jacqueline giggled.

"And Hamilton?"

"You are never gonna believe what he did, mom!"

"Not if you don't tell me!"

"You know how I told you about kissing him on the rooftop all those years ago?"

"Yeah…"

"Well, he had done a really romantic thing and put up candles and stuff up there for our special date," Jacqueline said.

"Really?"

"Yeah! And guess what?"

"What?"

"We're getting married!" Jacqueline squealed, looking down at the ring on her finger that glittered in the light. She was totally in loved with it.

"No! Really? He proposed? So soon?" her mother sounded shocked.

"Aren't you happy?"

"Of course I am, honey," her mother assured her. "But it's all so sudden."

"I know, but I've been in love with him since high school."

"I know, but are you sure about this. You hardly know each other."

"What is there to know more than that we love each other?" Jacqueline frowned impatiently. It was not like her mother to be this cautious.

"Well, I haven't met him since, well, I've never met him."

"Is that they only reason why you are hesitating?"

"Maybe," her mother's voice was now filled with amusement. "I want to meet the man who has been the capture of my daughter's heart since she was 15. Is that too much to ask?"

"Of course it isn't. We're coming to New York in a week ok? Will you be home?"

"I think I can ask for a week off," her mother said. "I'm sure they'll let me go meet the man my daughter is to marry."

"Or we'll come to you. We can figure something out," Jacqueline said. She wouldn't mind a trip to Europe to celebrate her engagement.

"Even better," said her mother pleased.

"That is settled then. Talk to you later! Love you." Jacqueline hung up and sat down. A rush of exhilarating joy flushed over her and she smiled widely. She was definitely the happiest woman in the world.

**-TBC-**

_I really have no excuse for taking so long with this. Have been working on other stuff, amongst all a new YA-fic. And on top of that I'm pregnant with my first child… A lot of my thoughts go in that direction at the moment! ;)_


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